Story of a Girl
by HealerAriel
Summary: Please forgive my writing skills in earlier chapters. I love you all, I think I may actually know how to finish this story, and without further ado, I bequeath to you Chapter 39. Formatting fixed!
1. Meet Millerna

Chapter rating: PG13 for language and violent themes. Author's note: I changed the formatting, so hopefully this'll be less confusing. Loveya! And gimme reviews!  
  
  
  
  
  
"I won't let him do it, Serenity," I said to my sister. Serenity turned her pained blue eyes on me. She knew how I felt. After all, when my sisters and I had first been given to Carlos's band of thieves, she'd been sixteen: the age at which we would each have to become that bastard's personal mistress. Serenity had put up with it for seven years, being forced to give him whatever he wanted, whenever he wanted. Now it was my turn.  
  
"What can you do to stop it, Millerna?" she asked softly. "It was the agreement Papa made with Carlos-"  
  
"Damn him! Don't you dare call him Papa after what he's done to us! Giving his daughters as whores, and for what? To bend the 'no-sons' curse that was put upon his ancestors by Carlos's own family?! I'll kill Carlos, then I'll make our father sorry!"  
  
"Millerna, please don't speak that way," Serenity begged. "If Lilliana and Dana were to hear you talk of murder..."  
  
"You would keep them ignorant of what's been done to us?" I demanded in outrage. "Carlos has raped you every night since your sixteenth birthday, Serenity! How can you not want him dead?"  
  
"I don't want my little sister becoming a killer, Millerna," Serenity said, tears welling up in her eyes. "Not for Carlos."  
  
"I would chose to be a murderer rather than to be bedded by that filth! I'll slit his throat before I let him have me! I'll slit mine!"  
  
"Millerna, no," she cried. "To take any life is to go against the gods, and to take your own life...Why would you do that to us? To your sisters? What would we do without you? You're the strongest of us all." I felt tears begin to stream down my own face now. I looked away from my sister.  
  
"I'll run away," I said. "I'll escape from here. Just as Ayden told me to."  
  
"I'm sorry about him, Millerna," she said, putting a hand on my shoulder. "It shouldn't have happened. I'm sure his spirit is watching you." I buried my face in my sister's shoulder.  
  
"He was the one male I trusted, Serenity," I sniffed, trying my hardest not to really cry. "He was my best friend. Why did he have to be-?" What had happened to Ayden those years ago had only made me despise Carlos even more. Ayden was his cousin! How do you justify 'accidentally' firing an arrow through your cousin during a raid?  
  
"Life's not fair," Serenity said. "Especially, it seems, for a woman. But what can we do? Like it or not, it's a man's world." I hated hearing her talk like this. Serenity had always been submissive, like our mother. If she didn't like something, she usually just put up with it because she felt that was what she was supposed to do. 'A lady's job is to do what she is told, nothing more, nothing less,' she had once said to me. I remember slapping her as soon as the words were out of her mouth, and cursing her subservience.  
  
I had always been Serenity's antithesis. I'll admit, I've had a bad attitude all my life. Ayden used to say, jokingly, that I could get downright bitchy at times. He saw that as a good thing, he'd said, as a meek girl would never have learned the things he taught me so well, much less have had the guts to use them: Ayden had taught me how to fight. Not just with daggers and swords and traditional weaponry, though. He had taught me how to fight with whip chains, steel fans, throwing knives, staff weapons, and my own body in martial arts. During my training sessions, we would plan our eventual escape from the thieves.  
  
"When we get out of here, Millerna," he said once, "we'll live as warriors. We'll creep around in the shadows, fighting crime, stealing from the rich and giving to the poor. We'll live in a dragon-guarded lair full of our treasures, and we'll bow down to no man! We'll be free to do as we please, until you marry, of course. Then it'll just be me, your poor, lonely confidante, living by myself as you're far off, pleasing your husband." I had then told him, in no uncertain terms, that if I ever hit my head hard enough to actually want to marry, my husband would have the duty of pleasing me, not the other way around. Ayden had laughed and said,  
  
"Just watch, Millerna. You'll marry one day, probably to some charming, heroic outlaw. Me, I've got my eyes on the girl who lives in there," he'd said, pointing to the castle many miles in the distance. "A lot of money in it for me if I pull that deal off."  
  
"You mean Zelda of Hyrule? Forget it. She's probably some spoiled, pompous brat, and not as pretty as they say she is. Most royals aren't, you know, at least the ones where we come from. I'll bet you couldn't win her over if you did manage to meet her."  
  
"You mean, my charm, finesse, and devilish good looks might not do the trick?" he'd asked, feigning shock. True, Ayden was the handsomest man I'd ever met. He'd had curly black hair, black eyes, skin the color of brown sugar, and perfectly chisled features. "Well, I'd better use plan 'B', then," he'd said. His plan 'B'? "I'll climb onto her balcony and seduce her, like the swashbuckling romantic hero I am." I wasted no time in telling him that his plan probably wouldn't work. He'd just laughed.  
  
I missed my friend so much.  
  
***  
  
A bit later that evening, I was instructed to bring refreshments to Carlos and a guest of his. A perfect opportunity to ensure the success of my escape plot, I thought. Being the genius I took myself to be, I used a handy little trick my Aunt Miranda had taught me: I mixed just enough poison into Carlos's wine goblet to render him unconcious for, oh, about twenty-four hours after it had worked its way into his system. He would just assume that he'd gotten incredibly drunk. God, I hoped he'd have a splitting headache for the next week after he woke up. Oh, I suppose I could've just kicked him in the head as soon as he got me into his tent, but poisoning his drink was much more appealing at the time.  
  
"Take that, you son of a bitch," I muttered under my breath, laughing maniacally inside my head. Anyone with half a brain would've noticed that I looked way too cocky under the circumstances, and figured that I was up to something, but since we were talking about Carlos, I wasn't too worried about that. He'd never been much in the way of brains.  
  
As I made my way out of the tent, smirking and marvelling at my brilliance, I noticed my younger sisters spying on Carlos and this guest of his.  
  
"What are you doing?" I demanded of them. They jumped in surprise and stared innocently up at me.  
  
"We were just looking at Carlos's friend," Lilliana said. She was thirteen, and Dana was ten. Both looked like shorter versions of Serenity. Only Aunt Miranda and I had green eyes.  
  
"He's cute," Dana agreed.  
  
"You shouldn't be looking at men, either of you," I snapped. "Especially ones he associates with. Stay in here." I heard Dana mutter something about me being "so mean all the time" as I pushed past them and made my way to where Carlos and his new 'friend' sat. The other man had his back to me.  
  
"Ah, Millerna!" Carlos said upon my arrival. Don't you dare smile at me, you vermin, I'll gut you alive. I walked past his guest and forced an incredibly fake smile as I handed him his goblet. I wanted to make sure the poison hit him as soon as possible.  
  
"Enjoy," I said, the fake smile turning into a very real smirk.  
  
"Thank you, my little beauty," he said. Must be pretty damn drunk already not to notice this big evil grin on my face, I decided. "Now turn around, girl, so our visitor can see you. A terrible crime, not to show off such loveliness." I'm going to kill you, you know that? I thought pleasantly as I obeyed. I'll rip your heart out and leave you for the scavengers.  
  
It was then that I caught my first glance of the other man. He looked about twenty, with long blonde hair and beautiful, dark blue eyes. Dana and Lilliana's proclamation that he was cute was a severe understatement: he was absolutely gorgeous! Somehow, he made me think of my old Spirit Guide, Amara. I hadn't seen her in several years, though, so anyone with blonde hair and an air of innocence probably would have reminded me of her. I shook it off.  
  
I noticed that he was looking at me, too. No need for that. I didn't have an unattractive face, but my favorite features, my muscular legs, were hidden under the tightly corsetted dress I'd been instructed to wear. Worse, the dress was fuschia. I detest fuschia. He was still looking at me, but strangely, I didn't mind much.  
  
"A prize, this one, don't you think?" Carlos prompted, grabbing my hips and pulling me to him.  
  
"You will take your hands off me, Carlos, or I will take them off you," I informed venomously.  
  
"Oh, you would speak to me in such a way, even tonight?" he purred, stroking my hair. The younger man shot Carlos a look that said, quite plainly, "Are you insane?" Carlos took no notice. I was very aware of the dagger I had hidden in the bodice of my dress. There was such a temptation to drive it to the hilt in his chest. "Remember, tonight you become a woman." I yanked myself out of his grasp.  
  
"You contemptable bastard!" I spat. "You will not so much as touch me! Not tonight, not ever! That is a promise!" That insufferable jackass laughed!  
  
"There's some of that spirit!" he crowed. "I do love a fiery young lady, don't you, Link?" Ah, so that was the insanely attractive man's name. Link opened his mouth to say something, then thought better of it and remained silent. Carlos found this amusing.  
  
"Left you speechless, has she?" he asked, chuckling. "I don't blame you, it takes a while to get used to a girl of her vigor."  
  
"You stupid son of a..." I muttered a long line of obscenities under my breath as I walked away from Carlos. I noticed an amused smile on the handsome young man's face as I passed him. He'd heard what I said, and nodded slightly in agreement.  
  
And despite everything, the fact that he didn't like Carlos either made me smile. 


	2. Hard to Handle

Chapter rating: PG13, again for language and violence, with some, er, suggestive stuff mixed in. Heh heh, enjoy!  
  
  
  
I crept out of Carlos's tent at around midnight. Oh, there'd been no fun for him. The poison had kicked in just as he was preparing himself. I love me.  
  
Unfortunately, though, I had to borrow some of his clothes for my escape, as one couldn't very well ride and climb and fight in a dress, could one? His clothes didn't fit me well: my hips were wider than the pants would comfortably allow, and the shirt was much too big, although an oversized shirt made it much easier to conceal weapons.  
  
It had taken me a good twenty minutes to get all my weapons together. I'd strapped my daggers to my thighs, tied my whip chain around my waist, and managed to hide everything else as well. Ayden had always told me never to let on that you're armed, and to keep weapons concealed where no one would think of looking. Hence, hiding a knife in a shoe, or the bodice of a dress, as my case had been.  
  
"Now, for a ride outta here," I muttered, once I'd gotten to the horses. "Choices, choices." There was a nice red mare I hadn't seen before. Probably a recent acquisition of Carlos's. Too bad.  
  
"Hey, honey," I said softly, cutting her free. "You'll let me ride you, won't you? That's a good girl." I patted her on the nose and proceeded to climb onto her back. Apparently she did not want to let me ride her. In a matter of seconds I went flying through the air and landed hard right on my far-to-confident ass.  
  
"Damn wretched beast!" I spat. "Ow!"  
  
"You know, Miss, stealing a man's horse doesn't qualify as a proper introduction," an amused voice said from behind me. I whirled around to give the jerk a piece of my mind - or rather, my fist -, and found that it was not one of Carlos's cronies, but the young man from earlier who was watching me with a cocky sort of amusement. Oh, shit, she's his horse? Millerna, you idiot! I scolded myself.  
  
"I'm Link," he said, his smirk turning into a heart-melting smile as he offered his hand to help me up. He was adorable, but I was not about to let on that I'd screwed up. I gave him my best 'don't-you-dare-try-to-help- me' glare and got to my feet.  
  
"I'm Millerna," I replied, "and if you don't mind, Pretty Boy, I've gotta get out of here, fast." "So you decided to steal my horse?"  
  
"Dammit, I didn't know she was yours, alright!? I need to get far away before his guys catch me, and yours was the first horse I saw, get it?"  
  
"So, you apologize for being a little thief?"  
  
"I will not waste time with you! I have to get away before that bastard regains consciousness and gets a chance at me!" Link looked confused.  
  
"Get's a chance at you?" he asked. Oh, God, I knew I sensed innocence in this guy. I decided to explain this very clearly.  
  
"If I do not get out of this place, I will become asshole's"- I jerked my head toward Carlos's tent - "little sex toy. Do you understand my motivation, here, cutie?" He looked embarrassed.  
  
"Uh, yeah, now I do..." he mumbled, looking at the ground.  
  
"Good boy."  
  
"Hey," he said, looking back at me, "I could help you get away, if you, you know, want me to. I know some women who'd let you live with them. Have you heard of the Gerudos?" Had I heard of them? They were legendary! And they hated men! Oh, it would be an honor just to be around them!  
  
"Y-you know them? Really?" I asked, my eyes widening with a new respect for the Pretty Boy. If the Gerudos liked him...he must really be something!  
  
"Yeah, no big deal," he said, shrugging. No big deal? The Gerudo women were like deities! "But I can't take you directly to them. I need to report back to the Princess about Carlos and his band first."  
  
"You know her, too?" I asked, amazed.  
  
"I'm technically her advisor-slash-bodyguard," he answered nonchalantly. My jaw dropped. Damn, this guy had friends in high places! How did he manage that?  
  
"You must be a pretty important guy," I remarked, trying to sound less impressed than I was.  
  
"Oh, legendary," he said, grinning. "Literally. I'll tell you about it later. Now kindly select a different horse, and we'll be on our way," he teased. Was it bad of me to notice the way his muscles rippled as he climbed onto the red mare's back? Was it bad of me to wish my outfit were a bit more form fitting in the legs and chest, for reasons other than comfort?  
  
I stopped admiring his body and cut loose Carlos's black mare, appropriately named Ebony. She liked me more than she liked him, anyway.  
  
"And she steals another horse," Link commented.  
  
"Oh shut up, Pretty Boy," I replied as I hoisted myself onto the horse. "Carlos can find a new horse, because Ebony's my baby, aren't you?" She snorted softly and shook her head up and down. "I taught her to do that," I informed, smiling.  
  
***  
  
Okay, so Millerna had a bit of an attitude problem and swore more than a girl was supposed to; Link couldn't help noticing how attractive she was. The glossy black hair that fell to her waist; the cat-like green eyes framed by long black eyelashes; the full red lips; the creamy skin that seemed to glow in the moonlight: the effect was stunning, and he found himself glancing at her more often then he should have. It wasn't proper for a man to admire a girl's looks as much as he was admiring Millerna's, and he felt guilty about it. Every now and then he caught her looking at him, but she would look away as soon as he returned her gaze.  
  
He couldn't help but smile when that happened. He knew he was handsome - he'd been told so many times, and it was all that could be assumed by the way the young women in the kingdom made eyes at him - but he tried not to let it get to his head. To be honest, it embarrassed him when women looked at him that way. He didn't like it when someone undressed him with her eyes.  
  
And yet, Millerna appeared to have done just that more than once, and it hadn't bothered him at all. In fact, it had almost flattered him. Maybe Millerna just wasn't a normal girl.  
  
***  
  
"So," I said, "exactly what kind of a name is Link?" We'd stopped to give the horses a break, and were now sitting under a tree as the sun began to rise.  
  
"What kind of a name is Millerna?" he countered.  
  
"My aunt came up with it, actually," I replied. "Apparently it means something in the Ancient Language, but I'll be damned if I know what. And apparently someone named you after chain maille."  
  
"Can we talk about something else?" I thought about this.  
  
"We could talk about your boss, Zelda," I offered.  
  
"My boss, Zelda?" he repeated. "Kindly refer to her as Princess Zelda, would you?"  
  
"We could talk about your boss, Princess Zelda - is that better? I want to know something about her before I have to meet her. So what's she like? Short, tall; fat, skinny; pretty, ugly; smart, dumb? Gimme a vague description of this broad." Link treated me to a look of utter disbelief, as though lack of respect for the princess was completely unheard of; which, I reminded myself, it probably was. He sighed as if I were draining him of all his patience, then said,  
  
"The Princess is a very kind and beautiful woman. I'm very honored to know her as well as I do."  
  
"Uh-huh," I said, giving him a sly glance. "I see."  
  
"You see what?"  
  
"You're having an affair with the almighty Zelda, aren't you?" I accused, grinning evilly.  
  
"W-what? Me? No way!" Link insisted. "We're good friends, that's all!"  
  
"Sure. I've never known a Pretty Boy to deny his relationships; you must just be special."  
  
"You know, I'm really beginning to wish I'd left you with Carlos," he grumbled.  
  
"I'm not too fond of you, either," I informed. Link groaned and got to his feet.  
  
"Alright, since you and I are most likely going to be stuck together for a while, I need to get some things straight with you: first off, you show me and the Princess a little more respect; secondly, I make the calls if we get into a dangerous situation; and thirdly - and most importantly -, if I need to fight someone or something for any reason, you stay back so you don't get hurt. Do I make myself clear?"  
  
"Wait...I stay back so I don't get hurt?" I repeated indignantly. "Exactly what the hell makes you think I will get hurt?" Link gave a small laugh.  
  
"Well, come on, Millerna," he said. "You're a woman. Women don't know how to fight." Link was soon corrected. In a matter of seconds I had knocked him to his knees, grabbed a handful of his hair, and locked my leg around his throat. I held him there.  
  
"You were saying?" I asked in my sweetest, girliest voice, tightening the grip on his throat.  
  
"Y-you win!" he choked.  
  
"I'm sorry?" I asked, still in feminine character. "I'm sorry; I didn't quite catch that?"  
  
"YOU WIN!" he yelled. I released my hold on him, pushed him onto his back, and pinned him to the ground. I leaned down close to his face.  
  
"Now let me get something straight with you," I purred. "I am not like the girls you know. I am not some helpless little bimbo who needs to be saved on a daily basis by a big, strong man. I do not cry if I break a nail, I do not wither and die if left to my own devices, and I do not break if I have to fight some stupid goon. I prefer to do the breaking." I tangled my fingers into his hair and pulled his face closer. "Do I make myself clear?" This, perhaps, was taking it a little too far. He was still bigger and stronger than me, and managed to flip me onto my back. He gave me a charming grin.  
  
"Don't start with me, Millerna." I threw my legs around his neck in a choker-hold. He may have been stronger, but I had technique, flexibility, and the element of surprise on my side.  
  
"Don't piss me off, Linkie-Boy," I shot back. "I could kill you like this."  
  
"There are worse ways to go," he panted, smiling at me, "than with a woman's legs around your neck."  
  
"H-how dare...? OOOHHH!" I kicked him away from me and scrambled to my feet.  
  
"Aww, did I make you nervous, Millerna?" he teased, still giving me that damn cute smile.  
  
"You," I snarled, pointing at him. "GO TO HELL!" 


	3. Not Such a Bitch After All?

Chapter rating is yet again PG13, for the same reasons. This gets a wee bit more suggestive, so read on if you dare. UPDATED! And to a beloved reviewer named Nabooru: if I do end up going past the sweet stuff, it'll be way, WAY into the story. Millerna may be from a disrespectable background, but she's not a slut.  
  
  
  
  
  
Millerna and I rode in silence for a few hours after that little scuffle. Alright, so it was a rude thing to say, but it had served the intended purpose of allowing me to breathe again. Millerna looked thoroughly embarrassed, shocked, and pissed off at the same time - more pissed than anything -, although she managed somehow to be absolutely beautiful even when she was considering ripping my lungs out. Okay, so she hadn't said she wanted to rip my lungs out, but when a woman yells at you to go to hell first thing in the morning and doesn't speak to you until almost sundown, it's all that can be assumed.  
  
"You're still angry, aren't you?" I asked when I couldn't take the silence anymore.  
  
"You bet your ass I am."  
  
"Ooookay, then." About five minutes of silence. "I don't get how you can stay mad at me for so long over something like that." Millerna looked like she was thinking this over.  
  
"Okay, maybe I over-reacted a little about that 'worse ways to go' thing," she admitted. "But it...it brought back unpleasant memories when you said that. Carlos said things like that."  
  
"Uh, yeah, I figured that may have been what was bothering you. Sorry. But I couldn't breathe, it was a last resort. You have very good moves, by the way. I withdraw the remark about women and fighting."  
  
"Because that was what pissed me off in the first place, and got your neck between my legs. If you hadn't said something so damn cheauvenistic, I wouldn't have felt the need to choke you."  
  
"I have learned my lesson, believe me," I said, massaging my throat.  
  
"I didn't do any permanent damage, did I?" Millerna asked, looking a little embarrassed.  
  
"I'm not sure. But I know that my neck hurts."  
  
"Sorry about that. I was a little overenthusiastic in my murderous rage. We can stop up here and I'll make sure you're okay," she said, nodding toward a stream a few yards ahead. When we got to the stream we let the horses go and do what they wanted, then settled down under a tree.  
  
"Okay, let me see what kind of damage I've inflicted," Millerna said in a much gentler voice than she used normally. She stroked her fingers lightly over my neck. That feels good, a voice in the back of my head stated. That feels very good. Maybe I should let her choke me more often- I tried to erase the thoughts from my head.  
  
"I don't think I've wounded you fatally," Millerna said, after she'd finished examining me. "I guess it's time for my dear Aunt Miranda's old standby of 'kiss it and make it better'." She leaned over and kissed my throat. That feels even better, the little voice in my head informed. I could get used to this. No, no it wasn't proper to have thoughts like that. A second kiss on my neck. I love this. This is heaven. I wasn't supposed to feel like this. What was happening to me?  
  
"I didn't kill you, did I?" Millerna laughed. I had closed my eyes, half in sheer terror, half in ecstasy.  
  
"Uh, no," I said, coming back to my senses. "I guess I zoned out for a minute. We should get going."  
  
***  
  
"You know what?" I announced at around midnight. "I'm tired."  
  
"So am I," Link replied. "But you don't see me complaining."  
  
"Yeah," I said, "but you're the big, strong, hero guy. I'm the sweet, innocent, damsel in distress, remember?"  
  
"Innocent? I beg to differ." He rubbed his throat. Maybe I'd gone a little overboard with the leg chokes today.  
  
"Sorry about the choking thing," I said, feeling a little guilty.  
  
"Uh, I wasn't really referring to the choking..." he mumbled.  
  
"Then what were you-? Oh." Had the kisses on his neck bothered him? Strange, when I was little it comforted me to have my mother or my Auntie kiss the various wounds I got. "Sorry," I said. "When I got hurt as a kid, that always made me feel better, so I figured..." I shrugged.  
  
"You kissing me didn't bother me," he said. "My reaction to it is what bothered me."  
  
"What was your reaction?" I asked, curious about this odd proclamation.  
  
"Nevermind," he said quickly, looking embarrassed. "It's not important."  
  
"Okay," I said. If he didn't want to talk about it, I wasn't going to make him. I hated it when people tried to make me talk about things I didn't want to talk about, so it would have been hypocritical of me to do so to him. I may be a bitter, self-righteous bitch, but I am not a hypocrite. "I can take a hint." I yawned and leaned on Ebony, closing my eyes.  
  
"Wait," Link said. "Get on with me. I don't want you falling off your horse." I gave him a look.  
  
"Why do you care if I fall off?" I challenged.  
  
"Because I'm a gentleman," he replied in an equally challenging tone. I shrugged.  
  
"I'll buy that," I said. We stopped, and I climbed on with him. Ebony followed us obediently like a little puppy. I'm so loved. I yawned again, and rested my head against Pretty Boy's chest (he'd had me get on in front of him, so I didn't fall off the back of the horse).  
  
"Don't let this go to your head," I said. "This doesn't mean I like you."  
  
"Really?"  
  
"Absolutely. You mean nothing to me." 


	4. Coffee Addictions, and Bemoaning Small B...

Chapter four! Same rating as last three chapters.. You know what? I'll only post a rating if the chapter is anything BUT PG13, how does that suit you? Remember, keep the reviews coming. Man, I feel for Link and Millerna though...I've just spent a few hours practicing posting on a quarter horse, and my butt hurts! OW! Wanna go back to Western saddle! And, for the love of all things sacred, gimme a Tenessee walker to ride, not this big, stubborn quarter horse!  
  
  
  
I woke up in the morning in a bed, wearing a white nightgown. I could smell fresh bread and bacon from somewhere, probably downstairs. I could see a dozen horses outside the window, fourteen if you included Ebony and Link's red mare. This had to be a farm or something.  
  
"Millerna?" Pretty Boy knocked on the door. "Can I come in?" I decided to be obnoxious: it was, after all, my strong suit.  
  
"I don't know, can you?" I asked. Link sighed loudly and came in.  
  
"You know, you really need to work on that attitude of yours," he informed. I gave him my best 'sweet-and-innocent' look.  
  
"Me? Surely you jest. And exactly where are we?"  
  
"We are at my friend Malon's ranch. She'll be up in a few minutes to...help you with all that girl stuff. After that's over with, you can come down and have breakfast. I'd guess that you're hungry; you've been asleep for more than a day straight."  
  
"Seriously?" I asked. He nodded.  
  
"Yeah. Although I had a marvelous time, not listening to you talk."  
  
"Bite me, Forest Boy," I yawned. The red-headed woman who had appeared in the doorway laughed. She looked a few years older than me, probably Link's age (which I had not been far off on: he was a few months away from his twentieth birthday), and much thinner than me, although she still managed to have bigger breasts than I had. I hated that.  
  
"Okay, Link," she said. "Out. We have female matters to attend to."  
  
"Dear goddesses, I hope you can handle her," he muttered.  
  
"She's only giving you a hard time because you're a boy, now go somewhere else," she commanded, sitting down on the foot of the bed as he left the room, closing the door behind him.  
  
"Good morning," she said cheerfully. "I'm Malon."  
  
"Millerna. Hi."  
  
"Link seems to be having a bit of trouble with you, but that's just because he's inept at understanding women," she said, smiling. I smirked back.  
  
"Oh yeah, he is. Thinks we're all weaklings who need men to take care of us. Well, screw that." Malon looked as though she didn't approve of my language, but didn't say anything about it.  
  
She said, maintaining her almost unnervingly pleasant demeanor, "I'll run you a bath. While you bathe, I'll look for some clothes for you to wear."  
  
"What's wrong with the ones I was wearing?" I asked.  
  
"Well, they needed washing, not to mention that they were mens' clothes, and didn't fit you very well. I'll find you some proper clothes to wear." As much as I hated dresses, I figured it would be exceedingly rude of me to refuse Malon's hospitality, so I didn't voice my opinion.  
  
***  
  
  
  
I can't even begin to express how grateful I was to take a bath. I had always been a very clean person, and it really bothered me when I was unable to bathe.  
  
I felt considerably better once I had gotten out of the bathtub. I wrang out and braided my wet hair, and wrapped a towel around myself to go out into the bedroom. Malon had left me several outfit choices. I decided on a plain brown skirt over a gauzy white dress (this was, believe it or not, the least girly combination) that looked like it really couldn't be worn without and overskirt, unless one wanted to look slutty, since it was almost transparent. Then again, I had no breasts to speak of, anyway, so I figured: What the hell? Why not wear something see-through? There's nothing to see.  
  
"For the love of all things sacred, Malon, please tell me there's coffee," I begged the moment I was downstairs. I had quite an addiction to coffee: if I didn't have it, I got a headache. That's how it had been since I was thirteen years old. I loved coffee, I needed coffee!  
  
"There is plenty of coffee, don't panic," Link said, lounging at the kitchen table with his own cup of coffee.  
  
"Oooohhh, thank you, all things sacred!" I sighed, relieved.  
  
"How do you like your coffee?" Malon asked, laughing at me.  
  
"Cream and sugar," I replied. "Caffeine and sugar just go sooooo well together."  
  
"You're going to be hyper as hell," Link commented.  
  
"No, actually coffee with sugar is what makes me normal. You don't want to see me when I can't have coffee with sugar. I even scare myself on such occasions." I gratefully took my cup of coffee from Malon and sat down across from Link with it. I took a sip. "Aaahhh, coffee! I love you, coffee!"  
  
"Millerna? I've established something," Link said.  
  
"What would that be, O Pretty Boy?"  
  
"You are downright insane."  
  
"Yeah, so don't piss me off."  
  
  
  
  
  
(A/N - Yeah, it's short, whoopdee friggin' doo. For reference, Millerna's coffee addiction is based on mine, as well as her small breasts being based on my own. Geez, I hate having tiny breasts, and so does Millerna, cuz she's my alter-ego! Well, one of 'em.) 


	5. Loathing Navi, and Welcome to Hyrule Cas...

(A/N- Now this is where Navi comes into play. Don't ask me where she's been the past few chapters - I don't explain annoying little fairies.)  
  
  
  
  
  
"Come on, up, up, up!" A perky little voice chirped in my ear. Ugh, it was too early!  
  
"Go 'way," I mumbled into my pillow. "Lemme sleep."  
  
"Now really, you need to get up," the voice said, sounding slightly annoyed.  
  
"Geez, would you go awa- AH!" Hovering near my face was what looked like an incredibly small woman with blue wings and hair, surrounded by a blue light. "What are you!?"  
  
"I'm Navi," she said. "I've been Link's partner since he was a little boy."  
  
"Link's partner is...a bug?" I asked skeptically. The little woman gave me a very irritated look.  
  
"I'm a fairy," she said, as though I was some kind of idiot for not knowing that.  
  
"Ah. Charming," I replied. "Now if you'll excuse me, I'm going back to sleep."  
  
"No! You and Link are going to the castle today! You have to get up and get dressed like a proper lady!"  
  
This did not sound good.  
  
***  
  
This was not at all good. A while later I was wearing a very ugly, ruffled, pink-and-purple dress. I looked like the biggest loser imaginable. I was going to murder that fairy.  
  
"Oh, Millerna!" Malon cried. "You look so pretty!" I forced a smile. It was more of a snarl, actually, but who's going to critique me?  
  
"Can I please wear something else?" I asked through my gritted teeth. "I feel like a complete ass." Malon again gave me her *I-don't-approve-of- your-language-but-I'll-pretend-I-didn't-hear-that* look.  
  
"No, it's best to dress properly for an audience with the Princess."  
  
"Ah." I didn't feel like challenging her again. Her tone had stated quite clearly that the conversation was over. Then she got perky again.  
  
"Come on! Let's see what Link thinks of you!" she chirped, practically dragging me out of the room and down to the kitchen. It was going to take a lot of coffee to make me feel okay with this. In fact, it would probably take a lot of coffee *and* a lot of chocolate. If the situation got even worse, ice cream would be in order.  
  
"What do you think?" Malon asked with a huge smile. Pretty Boy studied me, looking like he would burst out laughing any moment.  
  
"She looks, uh, great," he said, trying to hide his amusement (and failing miserably).  
  
"I look like a damn ornament," I muttered. Malon gave me that look again, and I decided to shut up.  
  
  
  
***  
  
And so it was that after breakfast (and not nearly as much coffee as I needed), the Forest Boy and I made our way into the wonderful, magical Princess's little city. The fairy was drilling me on behavior the entire time.  
  
"-And absolutely *no cursing*," she finished.  
  
"In other words," I translated, "act nothing like myself."  
  
"That'd do it," Link said, grinning. "Girls like you...well, they're not respected."  
  
"I personally don't give a damn," I said. "All these little Hylian bastards can bite me, because I am not a conformist."  
  
"I said no cursing!" Navi screeched. "Don't you listen to anything?" That pissed me off.  
  
"Back off, buggie. Don't make me get a fly-swatter."  
  
"LINK! She's doing it again! She's calling me a bug!" the annoying little fairy accused.  
  
"Millerna, don't do that," Pretty Boy said, laughing. "And please, no attacking me in front of these people. It wouldn't look right." Yeah, it might upset his admirers, who were now coming out of their little houses to greet him.  
  
"You're a regular celebrity, Pretty Boy," I grumbled, though I doubt that he heard me through the noise the townsfolk were making. Yes, it seemed they all knew and loved him. I was, of course, invisible to his adoring fans - well, unless you count quite a few girls giving me dirty looks. But other than that I was just there. In the shadow of a man. How did other women live like that their whole lives?  
  
I pondered that as we rode up to the castle. It felt like a very long ride, though it was probably because we kept having to stop so people could come up and greet their big hero. I felt like punching someone, and the sooner I got out of that damn ugly dress, the better. Then I reminded myself that in the castle I would probably be supplied with many more damn ugly dresses to suffer in. Why couldn't women just wear pants? What was so unholy about that?  
  
"Here we are," Link said, after what seemed like forever. "Welcome to Hyrule Castle."  
  
"Oh. Wow." I said dully. "How fu-"  
  
"Millerna," he warned.  
  
"How *freaking* wonderful," I said. "Is that better, O proper one?"  
  
"Not much, but it'll have to do," he muttered, climbing off the red mare. He then came over to me.  
  
"Helping little old me off my horse?" I asked. "How chivalrous." Of course, I then jumped off Ebony from the other side.  
  
"Fine then," he grumbled. "Forgive me for trying to be a gentleman. I should have guessed that you would never accept such a gesture."  
  
"HAH!" the bug crowed. "See what you insisted on saving, Link?"  
  
"Hey, Navi, watch out! There may be frogs around!" I snapped. "The world's a dangerous place for little buzzy things."  
  
"Did you hear that, Link? She's insinuating that I'm a bug!"  
  
"Navi, you started it," Forest Boy said. Wait a minute, he was defending me? Odd. Very odd. I made my way up to the castle door.  
  
"Outta the way, muscle head," I said to the guard, who was looking at me like I was some sort of lower life form.  
  
"Excuse me? And just who do you think you are, little girl?" he sneered. "Would you like to spend some time in the dungeon?"  
  
"She's with me." The guard instantly changed his tune upon seeing Link.  
  
"Oh, uh, forgive me, Sir," the armored dick head stammered. "I was not aware that this...er...this...*person* was accompanying you. My sincerest apologies to you, madam."  
  
"Bullsh-"  
  
"We are here to meet with Princess Zelda," Link interrupted. "As soon as possible."  
  
"Oh, she's been expecting you, yes, I'll take you to her now." With that, Bastard opened the door and led us inside. Link pulled me back.  
  
"Are you insane?" he hissed. "You don't just go up and provoke a guy with a huge spear!"  
  
"He's only got a big ass spear to compensate for his tiny-"  
  
"Do you have a death wish?" he demanded. "Would it hurt you to pretend to be a nice, normal girl around these people?"  
  
"Define 'normal'. Being subservient and meek? I'll pass. They don't like me, that's their problem. I change for no one." 


	6. Enter Zelda, and Hylian Torture Devices

(A/N- betcha were wondering when Zelda was going to stick her gilded blonde head into the picture, weren't ya? Well wait no more. By the way, I kinda don't like Zelda, so if she seems ditzy/whiny/self-important, it's just me getting a little carried away. Also, when I describe corsets: all I say is true. I wore one in a play once, and breathing is a chore, not to mention moving.)  
  
  
  
  
  
The guard, whom I had silently nicknamed Bastard, led us through the castle. And man, that place was huge! Despite the impressive size and decorations, however, it wasn't very pleasant inside the castle. It was the middle of the day, but the corridors were dark and the air was stale. No amount of windows would have helped. I shifted uncomfortably in URPD (Ugly Ruffled Pink Dress), and wondered just how nobles put up with this all the time. True, I wasn't a big fan of sunlight, but fresh air was something I enjoyed.  
  
And another thing: the place smelled awful. Without air circulation, the heavy scents of perfumes, colognes, and oils mixed together and positively reeked. Another reason was that I doubted if these people bathed every day. Bastard smelled like he hadn't in a few weeks. This was, then again, probably why so many oils and perfumes were used. Forest Boy, however, smelled pretty nice. He probably figured like I did: if you're outside all the time, you may as well bathe in a lake or something. Cleanliness was good. Being neurotically clean myself, I quite admired cleanliness.  
  
To take my mind off of how much I wanted fresh air, I decided to instead study the wall decorations and the scenery outside the few windows there were. Hell, Bastard was walking slow enough for me to examine stuff. I wondered if being taken to the princess was some kind of ritual, or if he was just a slow, bored son of a bitch who had nothing better to do. Nevertheless, I followed like a good little girl behind the two men (the pain was unimaginable) and took my time checking out wall hangings and other interesting things.  
  
"Oh, wow!" I whispered, stopping. I had spotted a courtyard outside one of the windows: there were several trees and flowers, and a crystal pond in the center dotted with waterlillies. This was, without a doubt, the best thing I'd seen so far in the castle. I felt a hand grab mine.  
  
"Come on," Forest Boy said quietly, pulling me away from my view of the beautiful courtyard. I couldn't help noticing how gentle his grip on my hand was. I wouldn't have expected that from a warrior. I would have expected roughness. I was proven wrong.  
  
After about five more minutes (the walk would have been faster had Bastard not been leading us) we arrived at an elaborately decorated door. This was, undoubtedly, the door to Princess Zelda. Bastard opened the door and Link went inside. I would have followed, but Bastard held me back and insisted that I wait outside the room until invited in.  
  
"Asshole," I muttered under my breath.  
  
"What did you say?" Bastard demanded.  
  
"I said, 'That's cool'," I replied quickly.  
  
"Hmph!" Bastard then left, and I was free to disobey his orders and eavesdrop to my heart's content.  
  
"Link! You're back!" The girl who had spoken was tall, skinny, and had light blonde hair. Her dress was made of pale pink silk, and she wore what must have been a crown of some sort. I automatically did not like her for three reasons: 1) her clothing was ridiculously ornate, 2) she deliberately wore pink, and 3) although she looked like she probably weighed less than a hundred pounds, she still managed to have breasts about three sizes larger than mine. Yes, that was the kicker. If bony girls could have huge breasts, why couldn't a I have normal-sized ones? That was so damn unfair. I scowled as Link bowed to the princess. I now knew why so many men spread rumors of her beauty: she had a big chest, and that's all men cared about.  
  
There was apparently a hushed conversation going on, but I couldn't hear any of it clearly enough to take a guess, until,  
  
"Who is *she*?" Zelda asked, just noticing me. I was partially invisible, after all, having stood there for five minutes without being seen.  
  
"So you've noticed her?" He went on, saying something to only Zelda. Whatever it was, she looked slightly amused. Pretty Boy then turned to me. "Millerna, would you like to come in and meet the Princess?"  
  
"No."  
  
"That was not a request, Millerna," he said, with obvious annoyance. "Please. Get. Over. Here."  
  
"Bite me, Forest Boy," I scoffed. There were a few moments of silence before Zelda burst out laughing. Oh, now I was here for her amusement?  
  
"I believe, Link," she giggled, "that you have your work cut out for you!" I wasn't sure what that meant, but Pretty Boy apparently knew.  
  
"Don't I just," he said through gritted teeth. "Don't I just."  
  
  
  
***  
  
  
  
*God, someone shoot me right now,* I thought. It was evening now, and Zelda had invited Pretty Boy and I to dinner. Well, she'd invited him, and he insisted that I come. Sadistic son of a bitch wanted to watch me suffer, no doubt.  
  
"Hold still, milady," the servant girl ordered, annoyed with my attempts to break free of the stiff undergarments she was trying to bind me into.  
  
"Is this *really* necessary?" I demanded, trying desperately to breathe as she cinched a boned torture device around me from my hips to just below my breasts. This was affectionately called a corset, but Squeezing Apparatus From Hell seemed SO much more fitting.  
  
"Yes," she said calmly. "All ladies wear one." The temptation to scream 'I ain't a lady, you stupid bitch!' was overwhelming, but I kept my big mouth shut as my waist came to approximately sixteen inches in circumference. One's waist is not supposed to match one's age. It is cruel, unusual, and just freaking wrong.  
  
"Thanks for breaking all my damn ribs," I muttered, as she scurried off to get something else to burden me with. I was already laden with a very uncomfortable garter belt, a full underskirt, and that God forsaken corset. How much more could she possibly need to put on me? In answer to this, moments later stockings were clipped to the garter belt and a gown was pulled on over my head. The gown was the color of champagne, embroidered with gold phoenixes. It was pretty, and at least it wasn't pink.  
  
As the girl ran off to get something else, I examined myself in the mirror. The dress was very low-cut, and, thanks to the corset, showed much more cleavage than I was comfortable with. Still, aside from my unnaturally small waist, I had to admit that I looked pretty good in it. My near- contentment ended when SG (Servant Girl) came back and insisted that I 1) let her put my beautiful hair (the one thing I truly loved about myself) into a very tight bun, and 2) wear these huge-ass, high-heeled shoes. That ruined my mood from then on.  
  
  
  
(A/N- sorry it's so short, but the next topic just has to be a seperate chapter. Don't ask me why, it just does.) 


	7. Not Fun, Not Fun At All

(A/N- okie dokie, time to see if our girl can fake everyone out and act like a lady. Anyone care to take bets? Anyone?)  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
"Why is this happening to me?" I asked my reflection. "What have I done to deserve this?" I could not breathe, my head hurt because of that damn bun, I could not stand in these shoes, much less walk, and makeup had been piled onto my face. At least SG had refrained from putting perfume on me after I threatened to beat her to death with my shoe.  
  
"Millerna...wow."  
  
"Don't start, Pretty Boy," I snapped. "I hate this."  
  
"Why?" he asked. I turned to face him.  
  
"Okay, one: there is no way in hell that I could ever hope to walk in these shoes; two: this bun is yanking my scalp in all the directions it is NOT supposed to be yanked in; and three: this dress-slash-corset is doing double-duty of breaking my ribs AND cutting off circulation to my breasts."  
  
"Uh...I can see why that would be...not good," he said. "So, do you think you can manage to sit through dinner tonight?"  
  
"Assuming I can figure out how to sit in this damn thing?" I grumbled. "Oh, SCREW IT!" I yelled, kicking off the huge shoes and trying desperately to get my hair out of the bun. It wasn't working.  
  
"Stop, let me do it," he said. "You'll end up pulling all your hair out like that. Turn around." I sulkily did as he said, and he began to undo my hair. "I really don't see the point of all this," he stated.  
  
"Join the club, Pretty Boy," I muttered. "I'm fine with a clean face and men's clothes."  
  
"No, I mean...your hair's so beautiful, it's a shame to put it up," he said, gently combing his fingers through my waist-length hair. "I don't see the point of squeezing you into a corset, either."  
  
"Something we agree on. I don't know about these Hylian broads, but I happen to like breathing."  
  
"Millerna, promise me that you will behave properly during dinner," he said. "No swearing, no sarcasm, no attacking me, no provoking the guards...you catch my drift?"  
  
"In other words, if I keep my mouth shut, I'll do just fine," I nodded.  
  
"That's about right," he said, smiling. He took a gold hair clip off the dresser and pulled my hair back with it. "So everyone can see your pretty face," he explained. My heart fluttered. He thought I was pretty?  
  
"So, do I pass inspection?" I asked, turning to him. He looked me over. Was it my imagination, or did his eyes linger on my bust? I dismissed it as my imagination. He was too pure for that.  
  
"You look wonderful," he said. "How about me? Do I look stupid?" His outfit looked like something a prince would wear: blue velvet with a silver cape.  
  
"Without the green hat you're almost unrecognizable, but otherwise you look fine," I assured. *The velvet matches your eyes,* I thought. He flashed his charming smile.  
  
"Ready?"  
  
"As ready as I'll ever be."  
  
  
  
***  
  
  
  
  
  
Dinner with the almighty Zelda taught me a very important lesson: Hylians talk too damn much. All night I was being asked things like,  
  
"Where are you from?"  
  
"How did you meet Link?"  
  
"How long will you be staying here?"  
  
Many of these came from Zelda, actually. Aside from asking me things, I had a feeling that her and Forest Boy's hushed conversations were about me. I wondered what he was telling her. If it had anything to do with Carlos, I would be kicking his ass shortly; my background was none of Zelda's business.  
  
The food was no good. I mean, apparently these poor schmucks liked it, but to me it was near-impalatable. The meat was dry, the vegetables were bland, and there was no salt anywhere to try to make up for it. Not to mention that whatever they served for dessert was damn close to being pure sugar: disgusting. I would have given anything for Aunt Miranda's cooking. Practically the only things that were digestable were the bread and the wine - I don't like wine, but the water tasted...well, not good. *I have seen Hell,* I thought. *It is big, fancy, and belongs to Princess Zelda.* Not to mention that the women sitting on either side of me were just scary.  
  
"Do you like it here?" the blonde on my right asked in a sugary voice, smiling. God, she was so freaking cutesy. She had curly hair, huge blue eyes, and was, of course, stick-skinny.  
  
"Uh, well," I replied. "It's...er...big." Okay, what was I supposed to say? 'No, actually I'd boil my head in acid rather than sit here with you imbeciles'?  
  
"What's your name?" Cutesy asked, still giving me that sickly sweet smile. I wanted to knock all her teeth out.  
  
"Millerna," I said, trying my best to force a convincing smile.  
  
"I'm Marisol," she chirped. "It's really so nice to meet someone from another place, I mean, you must have so many interesting stories about your homeland. It really does get quite dull around the castle, all this luxury- " Oh, she went on and on, not even checking to see if I was listening, which I wasn't. Someone tapped on my shoulder. I turned to the woman on my left.  
  
"I am Brunhilde," she said. The woman was, by the looks of it, at least a foot taller than I and outweighed me by about a hundred pounds. She looked mannish, and certainly did not belong in her pink satin gown. "How are you?" she asked in a heavily accented voice.  
  
"Um...I'm fine, thank you," I replied in a very small voice. Cutesy I could take if she pissed me off. This woman I could not. I may be reckless, but I'm not stupid enough to provoke someone who could crush me.  
  
"Vas ze food to your liking?" she continued.  
  
"It's...it's different than what I'm used to," I said.  
  
"Ja, it is not what I am used to, either," she agreed. "Vat my mother cooked ven I vas a little girl vas much better zan zis." I dared not ask what her mother cooked. I instead caught Pretty Boy's eye and gave him a pleading look. He slowly shook his head. I would have to sit this one out. Oh, he was getting his ass kicked.  
  
  
  
***  
  
  
  
"Do you have any inkling of how excruciating that was!?" I hissed at him once we'd been allowed to go. "I was sitting next to a ditz and a giant!" The terrible food had left me hungrier than I was before, and I was not in a good mood with Pretty Boy for making me go.  
  
"Millerna, sometimes you just have to deal with things," he said, leading me into my room and closing the door behind us. "You can't always have your way."  
  
"YOU'RE ACTING AS THOUGH I'M BEING SELFISH!" I yelled. "I FOLLOWED YOUR STUPID INSTRUCTIONS, SO WHAT THE HELL MORE DO YOU WANT?!?"  
  
"Would you be quiet?"  
  
"I'LL BE AS LOUD AS I WANT TO BE, YOU SADISTIC BASTARD! YOU KNEW DAMN WELL THAT I'D HATE IT THERE, BUT YOU MADE ME GO ANYWAY! DO YOU *ENJOY* SEEING ME MISERABLE? DOES IT *AMUSE* YOU?"  
  
"Millerna, calm down."  
  
"OH, FUCK OFF!" I bellowed. He stared at me in shock. I took a few deep breaths, then continued. "You know what I'm going to do? I am going to get out of these clothes, I'm going to take a nice, long bath, and maybe once I've done that, I will not feel the need to dissect you alive. Excuse me." I shoved him out the door, then attempted to get out of my dress. It did not work. I opened the door again.  
  
"Help," I commanded.  
  
"Whatever you say," he said quietly, coming back in. There was complete silence as he unbuttoned my dress (what kind of idiot puts buttons down the back of a dress?) and untied the knots in my corset (again, what kind of dismally brainless person makes clothes with fastenings in back?). He took the clip out of my hair and laid it back on the dresser and picked up a silver brush.  
  
"I'm sorry I made you come," he said, slowly brushing my hair. "And I'm sorry they put you in all this...ridiculous underwear. I didn't know it would be so bad for you." He rubbed my back. My eyes closed. That was making me feel better. I sighed.  
  
"Can you forgive me?" he asked softly. I shook myself out of it.  
  
"I'll think about it," I snapped. "Now get ou while I take a bath."  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
(A/N- what do you think? It's a bit longer than the last one, at least. And my little doggy, Cleo is the cutest puppy in the world! End of transmission!) 


	8. Sorting Her Thoughts

(A/N- Hello, my wonderful, wonderful readers! How are you? To be honest, I'm not sure why I'm writing this... but, whatever. Thanks to Dekustar for the plot twist idea, by the way. I like that, I can use that.)  
  
  
  
  
  
The bathroom in my room surprised me. It actually smelled better than the hallways, probably because not many people used it. The whole room was impeccably clean, and there were several plants in ceramic pots around the bathtub in the center of the room (which was quite large and circular, and was surrounded by a gauzy white curtain). I was suddenly struck with a burning question: if these people could take baths, why didn't they? Wasn't that totally defeating the purpose of having bathtubs?  
  
"Well, whatever suits them," I said to myself, starting the water in the tub. It was good to be able to control your water temperature. Malon's idea of a comfortable bath had required me to refill half the tub with cold water just to make it bearable. Hot water was not good unless it was freezing cold outside, and even then , warm water was just fine for me.  
  
  
  
  
  
***  
  
  
  
Relaxing in the bathtub was improving my mood, at least. I no longer wanted to rip Link's lungs out of his chest. I could settle for simply kicking him in the balls. Yep, that would work. I wouldn't kill him, I'd just make him incapable of reproducing.  
  
"...a strong and hansome hero from afar...make you a wife and a mother..." Amara's words entered my mind. What had she meant by that? Why had she deserted me?  
  
"...the man they spoke of, Millerna, is my son. The Goddesses have selected you to marry my son..." What had she said his name was, again? God, I couldn't remember, it was so long ago.  
  
"What was it?" I muttered. "What was her son's name? Come on, Millerna, you *know* this...What was his name?" I closed my eyes and tried to remember. What letter did it begin with?  
  
"...You know, Miss, stealing a man's horse doesn't qualify as a proper introduction..." Why was *that* coming back to me? I mean, memories of things Link had said were a little off-topic.  
  
A vision of Amara's spectral face flashed into my mind. Sparkling blue-gray eyes, blonde hair, and a warm smile. She'd been patient with me, a sarcastic little child. Nevertheless, I was often reminded to improve my disposition.  
  
"...You know, you really need to work on that attitude of yours..." His face replaced Amara's. Deep blue eyes and long blonde hair...that charming smile... "...No cursing, no sarcasm, no attacking me, no provoking the guards...you catch my drift?..." Why the hell was this relevant to the subject at hand? Why did thoughts of Link invade my mind when I was thinking of Amara? There was no connection between them.  
  
Was there?  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
(A/N- you guys thinkin' what I'm thinkin'? This subject is directly related to Spirit Guide, which I have just posted. It's technically the prequel to this story, but who's gonna judge me on that? Read it, I swear this chapter will make sense. Maybe.) 


	9. Midnight in the Courtyard

(A/N- Did the last chapter confuse you? Too bad. It may make sense later on in the story, for those of you who haven't already worked out an educated guess. By the way, this chapter might be R-rateable because of Millerna's colorful vocabulary.)  
  
  
  
  
  
My thoughts were still all jumbled once I'd gotten out of the bathtub and slipped on a nightgown that had been put into the closet, among other articles of clothing, for my benefit. Most of these I wouldn't wear if I could help it, but there were a few things that looked semi-wearable.  
  
With the notion that spending some time outside in the courtyard I'd spotted earlier mights help to get my thoughts in order, I rooted through the closet for shoes of some sort (I found white slippers. They were heavily embroidered, but at least they didn't have heels) and managed to find my courtyard quite easily. The moonlight glittered on the pond. This place was even more breathtaking at night. I stared up into the sky.  
  
  
  
***  
  
  
  
  
  
She was looking up at the stars, didn't know he was there. Her long black hair blew in the breeze. *She's so beautiful,* he thought. *How can anyone so mean be so beautiful?*  
  
He'd never felt this way before, not ever. He wanted to go up to her, slip his hands around her waist, and - actually, he'd wanted to do that earlier when he was helping her get undressed, but wasn't quite sure how she would take it. It was entirely possible that he would have ended up in another of her leg-chokes. Which, honestly, could have been worse... *Why am I thinking like this?* he demanded of himself. *What's wrong with me?"  
  
  
  
***  
  
  
  
I was being watched. I could feel it. Whoever - whatever - it was was in for more than they'd bargained for. I removed the knife I'd hidden in the bodice of my nightgown and spun around.  
  
"Damn it, Pretty Boy," I sighed, greatly relieved that I wouldn't have to get blood on my pretty knife just yet. "You just about gave me a fucking heart attack!" He groaned.  
  
"Was it really necessary to add 'fucking' to that?"  
  
"I can't help it," I said. "I've spent most of my life around bad language. But damn, don't sneak up on me like that. I could have killed you," I added, displaying my knife.  
  
"Millerna, it's midnight, everyone in their right mind is asleep. Why do you have a knife?"  
  
"Actually, I have two more on me," I informed, returning my knife to its hiding place. Forest Boy stared at me like I was insane, or paranoid, or both.  
  
"One knife in the cleavage of your bodice; where, may I ask, are the other two?" I gave him my best evil grin.  
  
I showed him the small knife in my slipper, and pulled the skirt of my gown up to reveal the dagger strapped to my right thigh. "What do you think?" I asked.  
  
"Nice legs - NO! That's not what I meant! I meant that - uh -" He was blushing bright red. I had a feeling I probably was, too, but I was very pleased nonetheless. He looked like he wanted to disappear.  
  
"Goodnight," he said in a small voice, before running like hell back into the castle.  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
(A/N- yes, it's short, but hopefully you found it....interesting. Till next time!) 


	10. A Nightmare

(A/N- Hello again! I trust you all found chapter 9 to be...intriguing. Keep in mind, I'm not good at getting inside Linkie-Boy's head, since he's a semi-adult male and I'm a fourteen-year-old girl, but I am trying my best. Hope these little segments don't confuse you!)  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
How was it that this was happening? He was the great Hero of Time, destined to protect his land and his Princess. He wasn't supposed to feel this way about anyone. Especially not Millerna. It made no sense why it had to be her: a sixteen-year-old girl with a bad background and a worse attitude.  
  
*I'm losing my mind,* he thought, laying on his back and staring at the ceiling above his bed. *I'm just losing my mind. Otherwise I'd have feelings for someone normal. Malon, maybe, or Zelda. Not Millerna. Definitely not her.* But the way she'd looked in the moonlit courtyard...the way the strands of shiny hair blew around her pretty face, the way her skin seemed to glow even brighter than the full moon above...those long, shapely legs...  
  
"I am so messed up," Link muttered, covering his face with his hands. "Goddesses, why can't I just go back to feeling the way I did before? Why do I feel so strange?"  
  
  
  
  
  
***  
  
  
  
The bed in my room was huge. Two people could have fit in it, maybe three. It was fancy, too, with a lacy canopy above it. Everything was white and lacy, the quilt had gold embroidery as well. I really couldn't see why everything had to be so decorative with these people, but at least the bed was nicer than the food had been.  
  
"Sleep is good," I said to myself, slipping under the covers.  
  
  
  
  
  
***  
  
  
  
  
  
***Trapped! Trapped in nothingness by that royal bimbo and those damn Sages. And that boy. The boy needed to die! He had tried to escape, but his attempts had been futile.  
  
"RELEASE ME!" he bellowed into the emptiness. "RELEASE ME FROM MY PRISON!" And for the first time, there came a reply.  
  
"What would be in it for me if I did?" a voice asked. The voice came from a man who had appeared beside him. He was tan skinned and black haired, in all the regality of an accomplished thief.  
  
"Excuse me?"  
  
"You heard me: what do I get if I free you?" the man said, smirking. "I demand payment for my services, Mr. Ganondorf..."***  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
Link suddenly bolted upright. Had that been a dream? It had felt so real! Was it possible for someone to break Ganondorf out of the evil realm?  
  
"Take it easy," he said to himself, taking a few deep breaths. "You were dreaming. It was just a nightmare." He lay back down and eventually fell asleep again.  
  
  
  
  
  
***"What sort of payment?" Gandondorf snarled. "What services?"  
  
"You want him dead, the boy Link? I want him dead, too. I'm willing to help you kill the little bastard."  
  
"Enlighten me, why do *you* want him dead?"  
  
"He stole my whore! And once we kill him, I. Want. Her. Back. That is the payment I want."  
  
"A tempting offer. What is your name, again?"***  
  
  
  
  
  
***  
  
  
  
"Millerna!" I sat up in bed and gave Pretty Boy my best glare. Why was he waking me up so damn early? It must have been two in the morning!  
  
"What?" I snapped. I am not now, nor have I ever been, a morning person. He ran a hand through messy blonde hair and started off on a long explanation of the dream he'd had.  
  
"Pretty Boy," I groaned. "You had a nightmare. Didn't your parents explain to you that nightmares aren't real?"  
  
"I never knew my parents." Complete and total silence. Me and my big mouth.  
  
"I...I'm sorry about that," I said. "I didn't know..."  
  
"No. It's fine. It doesn't matter." Yes it did. His eyes showed as much pain as Serenity's always had. I stepped out of bed onto a rug made of the long, white fur of some animal.  
  
"Come here," I said gently. He hesitated, then obeyed. I wrapped my arms around him. He stood rigid. "I'm sorry, honey," I said. "I guess I don't think before I speak." A few seconds of silence. "The idea is generally to hug back," I teased. He did so rather timidly.  
  
"You're right, this is nice," he said softly, his body relaxing slightly. I couldn't have agreed more. I pulled away a couple minutes later and gently took his face in my hands.  
  
"Maybe you should tell me about all this stuff, sweetheart," I said. "So I don't say something stupid again."  
  
"Yeah, that's a good idea," he agreed. 


	11. A HearttoHeart Talk, and Leaving The Cas...

(A/N- First, I wanna say that I love all of my reviewers. You guys make staying up till 3am every night totally worthwhile. Actually, I kinda like staying up till 3am, but...you guys gimme a reason to do so. Besides, I'm at my most creative at night - wait a minute.............Okay, I'm back. My little brother and I had to make coffee. We have to stay up all night. By the by, this chapter should probably be rated R to be safe. Millerna has some, uh, interesting things going on in her head.)  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
For hours I sat with Link on my bed as he told me all about his "Hero of Time" ordeal. And what did I think of this? He'd never had any time to just be a kid! I mean, day and night, doing Zelda's bidding, trying to find and stop this loser, Ganondorf. And he hadn't even killed the guy! The "Sages" just locked him in some other dimension. Yeah, *that'll* keep a homicidal psycho away for a long time.  
  
"Explain to me again how you got stuck with this," I said. "It doesn't seem fair."  
  
"It's not," he said. "But it's this stupid ancient prophecy, and apparently I was chosen to fulfill it from the day I was born." He shook his head and sighed.  
  
"So I take it you didn't apply for the position," I remarked.  
  
"No. And - I've never told anyone this, but - I wish the position weren't mine. Wish it every day of my life. The battles, the killing, the chance of being killed...I never wanted that." I ran my fingers through his hair, trying to comfort him a little.  
  
"And you can't tell anyone that either, can you?"  
  
"Of course not," he said bitterly. "I'm the Hero of Time. I'm not allowed to get angry, confused, scared, or otherwise fuck up in any way, shape, or form. But my God, Millerna, it's scary as hell living like this. And nobody cares, as long as I do what I'm supposed to."  
  
"I care," I said, taking his hand in mine and kissing his fingertips. He gave me a half-smile.  
  
"And you have no idea how grateful I am for that," he replied, his other hand stroking my cheek.  
  
"Helps to vent your frustrations, doesn't it, Pretty Boy?"  
  
"Yes, it does." He leaned in and kissed my forehead. "Thanks for listening to me. I'll let you sleep now." He touched my face one last time, and went back to his room. I fell back on my bed and sighed, enamoured. The fluttering of my heart, the warm feeling... Ayden had told me about this when I was younger.  
  
It was how you felt when you were falling in love. And with that notion, I crawled back under the blankets and fell asleep.  
  
  
  
***  
  
  
  
  
  
***...Our bodies pressed together. I could feel his breath, hear his heartbeat, taste his lips. He kissed my neck and stroked my breasts. It was wonderful. He gently forced his tongue into my mouth, and at the same moment, he entered me-***  
  
"Millerna, get out of bed." I bolted upright.  
  
"Oh...uh...it's you," I said stupidly, with the distinct feeling that I was blushing like crazy. It's not preferable to be woken up by the person you were just dreaming about having sex with. "Why exactly are you waking me up?"  
  
"Because it is almost ten o' clock and time for breakfast."  
  
"Oh. Shit," I mumbled groggily. "Look, do I have to go down there? I don't wanna get all dressed up, and it's too early for me to be around lots of people."  
  
"I could have food brought to you. Being surrounded by servants has its advantages, after all," he said, smiling.  
  
"I just want coffee, man," I said. "Lots and lots of very strong coffee. No offense, but the food here sucks. I need to give the chefs a lesson in cooking properly."  
  
"Yeah, the food definitely could be better, but you get used to it," he said. "At least they cook better where you're going." Huh? Oh, yeah, he was taking me to live with the Gerudos. I'd forgotten that...  
  
"Mmm," I mumbled. "That's a good thing, I guess."  
  
"What do you mean, you guess?" he teased, sitting down beside me and finger-combing my hair. "You still want to live with the Gerudos, don't you?" Actually, I wasn't so sure anymore. I shrugged. He smiled.  
  
"I'll go have someone get your coffee."  
  
  
  
***  
  
  
  
"Can they make nothing properly around here?" I asked sadly, staring down at the coffee.  
  
"It doesn't seem like it," Pretty Boy replied, looking thoroughly amused. The coffee tasted awful, and it had taken a hell of a lot of sugar to make it palatable. "You see why I don't drink the coffee here?"  
  
"Yes, yes I do," I said. "But when you're a caffeine addict, you can't be picky." I downed the rest of the coffee in one gulp and shuddered. "Okay!"  
  
"Well, now that you're all caffeinated," he said, laughing, "we should get going."  
  
"Get going where?"  
  
"The Princess thinks that I should show you around Hyrule. Let you get used to it here."  
  
"Works for me," I said. "I was getting damn tired of this place," I added, waving my hand around the dark room for emphasis.  
  
"And for the occasion, the Princess had this made for you," he said, handing me something wrapped in brown paper. I opened it, finding brown pants and a tan shirt.  
  
"No more dresses," I sighed, relieved. "Oh, thank God."  
  
"Don't get too happy, she also gave me some girly stuff for you. Not that I expect you to use any of it, but it was nice of her," he added. "Now you get dressed, and I'll saddle up the horses." 


	12. The Bitch is Back

(A/N- my God...Millerna's being nice. This has to stop, I'm ruining her! Oh well, she's got a split personality. Yeah, yeah that's a good excuse! Split personality, like Pink's song! And Asarhia: Hyrule probably doesn't have coffee, but since I'm a caffeine addict, I took some creative liberties ^_^ And Deku Scrub: not only guys have dreams like that, you know....)  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
Needless to say, my new outfit was much more comfortable than those damn dresses. I could move, I could breathe! Life was good!  
  
"Ah, finally, something that doesn't squeeze my hips, cinch my waist, and push up my tits!" I said happily as Pretty Boy and I made our way into the city. "I'm free!"  
  
"Millerna, do you have to discuss this with me?" he asked, looking uncomfortable.  
  
"What? I can't help it if I'm honest," I said indignantly, as once again the townspeople emerged from their houses, to bid farewell to their hero (their reluctant hero. I felt bad for him, just a little, though. I'm not going soft, or anything. No way). This time, however, I seemed to be getting much more attention. Especially from the men. There was a lot of whistling.  
  
"Goddesses, do they have to do that?" Link grumbled. "Don't do anything you'll regret, Millerna," he added, noticing my expression. I gritted my teeth.  
  
"Stupid peasant folk," I reminded myself, "stupid peasant folk, stupid peasant folk, stupid peasant-"  
  
"I'd love to get her out of those men's clothes and into my bed," some jerk said. I froze. Link gave me a worried look.  
  
"Millerna-!" Too late. I had jumped off Ebony.  
  
"Alright, boys," I said in the low, silky voice I only heard myself use when I was utterly pissed off. "Who wants to confess to that last remark?" The guy stepped forward with a cocky smirk.  
  
"Millerna, I told you not to do anything you'd regret," Link warned.  
  
"I won't regret this, Pretty Boy," I said, sizing up my enemy. He was only a few inches taller than me, heavily muscled. I gave him my sweetest smile. "This I will thoroughly enjoy." Seconds later my fist connected with Asshole's face. Blood now ran freely from his smashed nose. There was a pleasing look of horror on his face. I kicked him in the balls for good measure, gave the rest of the frightened crowd my girliest smile, and climbed back onto Ebony.  
  
"Now we can go," I said happily. I turned back to my bloodied and very pained new friend. "Learn some respect, you sleazy son of a bitch," I advised. There was a hint of a smile on Link's face.  
  
"That was incredibly nasty of you, Millerna," he said. "Nice work."  
  
  
  
***  
  
  
  
  
  
"So, what's the first stop on my tour of Zelda-land?" I asked.  
  
"I'm taking you to meet the tribe of Gorons who live up there," he said, nodding toward a huge mountain. "I'm under the distinct impression that Darunia is going to like you a lot."  
  
"Darunia..." I prompted. "Any important information?"  
  
"He's the head of the tribe, the Sage of Fire, too, by the way. He calls me his 'Sworn Brother' - it's an honor for their race."  
  
"Why are you so special to the Gorons?"  
  
"I...took care of a lizard problem for them," he said. "Two lizard problems, actually. They appreciated the effort. Darunia went as far as naming his son after me." I smirked.  
  
"So now I'll have to deal with Link *and* Goron Link. Splendid."  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
(A/N- once more, I apologize for chapter shortness, but the next chapter will be longer. Just to warn you, there won't be updates for a few days, because I'm going to North Carolina with my family. At least I'll get to drive my gandfather's ATV ^_^! ) 


	13. To Goron City

HealerAriel- For my readers, I have today a special surprise!  
  
Millerna- You call my being here for the introduction a special surprise? What have you been smoking, Erin?  
  
HealerAriel- Dammit, Millerna, when we're here my name is HealerAriel, and I am a divine force! I am your creator, worship me!  
  
Millerna- yeah, and in real life you're a lowly fourteen-year-old kid named Erin with a dorky brother and bad grades, so what?  
  
HealerAriel- Hey! I'm gonna try harder this year! I'm gonna have a GPA this time!  
  
Millerna- (evil laugh) I bet it'll be the lowest GPA in your high school, too.  
  
HealerAriel- Oh, shut up! Just read my damn story, okay! You're the main character!  
  
Millerna- (rolls her eyes and reads over it) I'm this much of a bitch?  
  
HealerAriel- Yep.  
  
Millerna- Awsome.  
  
HealerAriel- Yeah, I thought you'd like that. Now get lost, I have to type up this chapter.  
  
Millerna- Fine. I'll go get some coffee.  
  
HealerAriel- Bring me some.  
  
Millerna- Okay.  
  
  
  
  
  
(A/N- Well, back to the main theme of this! In this chapter, Millerna shall meet the Gorons. Man, I like the Gorons, they're so cool. By the way, I think of the Gorons as having Jamaican accents, so if their speech looks a wee bit weird, that's why. Loveya! And if you guys like Millerna, I'll call her back to give some introductions with me. If you don't like her...Well, don't tell her where you live, okay? She's insane.)  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
We had to go through a village to get to Death Mountain (ominous, don't you think?). Meaning that we had to go through a crowd of pointy- eared admirers to get to the Gorons.  
  
"I am quickly tiring of being surrounded by all of your fans," I grumbled, watching several teenaged girls swoon at the sight of Pretty Boy. I hated it when women did that. God, the show of weakness!  
  
"Remember, Millerna, pretend to be nice," he replied through a forced smile. At least we were on our horses so we were high above the crowd. "Don't attack, kill, or maim anyone, okay?"  
  
"It will not be easy," I muttered as a few guys started their whistling and catcalling. Link glared at them, and they shut up. He grinned at me.  
  
"Like magic," he said.  
  
"Yeah, so's my PMS," I growled, giving the guys a complementary hand signal as we started on the deserted path up to the mountain.  
  
"Your what?" he asked, looking confused.  
  
"PMS," I replied. "You know, pre-menstrual syndrome? When women get really bitchy around their periods?"  
  
"I have no clue what you're talking about," he said helpfully, "and you are almost always bitchy."  
  
"Yeah, I'll give you that much," I laughed. "But I'm worse when I've got PMS. You seriously don't know what I'm talking about?" He shook his head. "Your innocence amazes me, O pretty one."  
  
"It seems to amuse the castle guards," he informed. "They treat me like a kid, just because I haven't done the things they've done."  
  
"And what have they done?"  
  
"A lot of stuff with women, apparently. They talk about it all the time, but they never explain it to me." Man, he *was* innocent. I didn't know it was *possible* for a nineteen-year-old male to be so innocent.  
  
"So you don't know anything at all about sex?"  
  
"Not really," he replied. "If I ask any questions they just laugh and say something like: 'You'll understand when you become a man'. In what way am I not a man already?" he demanded, looking annoyed.  
  
"You're a virgin," I said simply. "I mean, you're a man in my book, but I know from personal experience that guys have different forms of classification. Even my friend Ayden used to believe that boys and girls became men and women through sex, and he wasn't some dumb ass like your guard buddies, either."  
  
"Your friend *used* to believe that? What changed his mind?" It was an innocent enough question. But the answer was that Ayden hadn't changed his mind, he had died.  
  
"Let's talk about something else," I said quickly. I didn't need pity from Forest Boy because of my dead friend. I didn't need anyone's pity.  
  
  
  
  
  
***  
  
  
  
"Millerna, I present to you: Goron City," Link said. All I could do was stare. An entire, multi-layer city was carved inside the mountain.  
  
"Oh," I breathed. "This is...*amazing*!" I had only a few moments to take in this architectural marvel, however.  
  
"Brother Link!" a voice exclaimed happily. "You've come to visit!" The being speaking looked like a mix between a gorilla and a rock, and had huge, round, purple eyes. It was kind of cute, in a weird sort of way.  
  
"Hello, Koroc," Pretty Boy replied. "How have you been?"  
  
"Oh, we've all been fine, Brother!" Then I was noticed. "Who is this?" Link pushed me forward.  
  
"Koroc, this is Millerna. Millerna, this is Koroc."  
  
"Pleased to meet you," Rocky (I can't help it, I give everyone nicknames) said, holding out a massive hand.  
  
"Uh...likewise," I said, shaking his hand.  
  
"Come!" Rocky said to us. "I'll take you to Big Brother!" He proceeded to lead us downward.  
  
"Big Brother?" I asked Link under my breath.  
  
"That's what they call Darunia," he informed.  
  
"Ah." After about fifteen minutes going down stairwells, we reached the bottom floor, and Rocky ushered us into what was, self-evidently, Darunia's throneroom.  
  
"BROTHER!" Okay, this guy was much bigger than Rocky. He had lots of hair and what looked like war paint on his face. Despite this, he looked like a pretty nice rock-dude.  
  
"Hey, Darunia!"  
  
"Where have you been all this time? I've been wanting you to visit, but you never come."  
  
"I'm too busy most of the time," Pretty Boy said. "I *am* the Princess's bodyguard."  
  
"Heh! The Princess, all she ever does is get herself into trouble."  
  
"It's what makes my job eventful," Pretty Boy said, laughing. Again, I was noticed several minutes into the conversation. Man, what am I, transparent?  
  
"Who's the girl, Brother Link?" Darunia asked.  
  
"This is Millerna," Link replied. "I'm showing her the kingdom." Darunia gave him a sly look.  
  
"You sure that's all you be showing her, Brother?"  
  
"Darunia!" Pretty Boy exclaimed, blushing.  
  
"Sadly yes," I said. Darunia laughed. It was a very loud, very joyful laugh. The kind you hardly ever hear.  
  
"I like her!" he practically roared. "Come, Brother! You've come in time for our summer festival!" 


	14. MantoMan

Millerna- Do I get to blow shit up in this chapter?  
  
HealerAriel- Geez, Millerna, how many times are you gonna ask me that?  
  
Millerna- I can't help it! I want FIREPOWER! MUWAHAHAHAHA!  
  
HealerAriel- You need therapy.  
  
Millerna- No, I NEED flamethrowers, bazookas, and missiles.  
  
HealerAriel- Link has bombs. Use them.  
  
Millerna- He says I'm too violent to be around anything with the possibility of spontaneous combustion.  
  
HealerAriel- And when do you actually listen to anything he says?  
  
Millerna- Never, but the point is that he keeps 'em hidden.  
  
HealerAriel- Oh, please! Everything he has is hidden in his clothes somewhere! The second he takes his clothes off you'll find all his weapons.  
  
Millerna and HealerAriel- O_O *drooling*  
  
Millerna- Hell, I don't care about his weapons as long as I get to see him naked. ^-^  
  
HealerAriel- Heh heh, me neither! Take it off, Link, baby!  
  
Millerna- Erin, you're too young to visualize Link naked.  
  
HealerAriel- I'm only two years younger than you! I can lust after him all I want!  
  
Millerna- Sheesh, when you're a little older we can share him, okay?  
  
HealerAriel- ^-^ OKAY!  
  
Millerna- So...Do I get to blow shit up in this chapter?  
  
HealerAriel- Why not?  
  
Millerna- HELL YEAH!  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
(A/N- I apologize for Millerna, if you don't like her in the introductions. Truth to be told, she won't shut up, and I kinda have to let her talk. Otherwise she'd hurt me ^_^;; (and I really don't enjoy leg chokes as much as Link does, hee hee!) But anyway, more with the Gorons!)  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
The Goron summer festival was like nothing I'd ever seen before. It ruled for several reasons: 1) I was not forced into any uncomfortable clothes; 2) the Gorons liked you for who you were; and 3) the entire point of the festival was to have fun.  
  
"This is so much better than being in the castle," I remarked. Darunia smiled at me.  
  
"The castle folk try to be proper," he agreed. "The Gorons, we love life!"  
  
"And alcohol," Pretty Boy laughed. There were indeed several huge barrels of wine and various other alcoholic liquids around.  
  
"Ah, but we have only the good stuff," Darunia said proudly, holding up a huge-ass mug. "None of that watered-down garbage the Hylians like. Try it, my Brother!" He passed Link a shot glass, which he eyed suspiciously.  
  
"What is this, Darunia?"  
  
"Drink it," the big guy prompted. Link gave him another look, and downed it. He made a face.  
  
"That's disgusting!" he coughed. Darunia laughed.  
  
"It's about a thousand proof, too," he informed, slapping Link on the back.  
  
"Ewwww," Link shuddered. "That is not something I want to try again, ever. I'll stick with wine, thank you."  
  
"To each his own," Darunia said, chuckling. "I'm rather fond of hard liquor, myself. How about your friend? What does she prefer?"  
  
"I'm good with water," I said. "I'm not really a big fan of alcohol." Darunia smiled.  
  
"You're young," he said. "You may like it someday." I somehow doubted it. All the wine I had tried so far had tasted pretty nasty.  
  
"Miss Millerna!" I turned around to see a group of teenaged-looking Gorons coming toward me. "Would you like to join our game?"  
  
"What game?" I asked.  
  
"Well, we use bombs to see who can-"  
  
"Bombs!?" I asked excitedly. "Count me in!" The young Gorons smiled.  
  
"Millerna-"  
  
"Sorry, Pretty Boy," I said quickly, "but blowing shit up is my life's calling. Seeya!"  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
***  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
"She's not bad," Darunia commented, watching Millerna and the young Gorons play their game, the object of which was, indeed, to 'blow shit up'. Link said nothing. "You're quiet tonight, Brother. Is there something on your mind? Or rather, someone?"  
  
"Why do you say that?"  
  
"It's obvious that you have feelings for her," Darunia replied, gesturing toward Millerna. Link sighed.  
  
"Strange feelings," he said, "like I've never had before. I can't stop looking at her, even though I know it's not proper."  
  
"That's quite understandable. She is a beautiful girl."  
  
"Even by Goron standards?"  
  
"Brother, beauty is beauty, no matter what race you come from. There are no standards."  
  
"Hmm." Link gazed absentmindedly at Millerna. Even with explodable objects at her disposal, and a slightly psychotic grin on her face, she was breathtaking. "I don't know what to do, Darunia," the young hero stated. "I keep having impure thoughts about her."  
  
"Like what?"  
  
"I...I want to touch her," he answered, blushing, "in ways that I know are wrong. I feel awful about it later, but..." Darunia smiled at him.  
  
"You're not a child anymore, Brother. You're grown. You're going to feel like that about women, it's normal."  
  
"Then why do I feel so strange?" the boy asked softly. "What do I do, Darunia? I think I'm falling in love with her."  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
(A/N- whatchathinkies? Gimme reviews, guys, tell me! "Sing it from the mountain, sister!" Sorry, my friend Daren always says that! Anyways, reviews, reviews, reviews! And tell me whether or not you want me to let Millerna help with the introduction, kay?) 


	15. Hangovers, and Man, This Is Kinda Embarr...

Millerna- I got to blow shit up! Joy! ^_^  
  
HealerAriel- Hee hee, how many Gorons did you end up killing, though?  
  
Millerna- None, thank you very much. I happen to have excellent aim with explodable things. I like explodable things. *psychotic look* They make me happy!  
  
HealerAriel- You scare me sometimes.  
  
Millerna- Scaring people also makes me happy. It's right up there with explosives, chocolate, and of course-  
  
Both- COFFEE!! ^_^ ^_^  
  
HealerAriel- *dreamy look* Coffee's the best thing on Earth.  
  
Millerna- Definitely. I could use some coffee.  
  
HealerAriel- Hello! Why do you think I had THIS put in?! *pushes a big red button and a wall revolves, revealing a fully-equipt Starbuck's*  
  
Millerna- *clunks HealerAriel upside the head* Why didn't you TELL me we had a Starbuck's at our immediate disposal?  
  
HealerAriel- ^_^;; Heh heh, musta slipped my mind.  
  
Millerna- Moron. I'm getting some cappucino, you want anything?  
  
HealerAriel- Caramel macchiato.  
  
Millerna- Venti?  
  
HealerAriel- Naturally.  
  
  
  
  
  
(A/N- Aha! The plot thickens! I think... Ah, well. CARAMEL MACCHIATOS RULE! And this chapter might be R- rateable. You'll see why.)  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
"Wake up, big guy," I said into his ear. He moaned and rolled onto his back.  
  
"Whatimeisit?" he mumbled almost incoherently.  
  
"Two in the afternoon," I replied. I was greeted by a pair of pretty blue eyes.  
  
"Seriously?"  
  
"Yep."  
  
"Why didn't you wake me up earlier?"  
  
"I didn't feel like it," I said. Honestly, I didn't have the heart to. He'd looked so sweet.  
  
"Ah," he said, sitting up. He clutched his head. "Man, I've got such a headache."  
  
"Yeah, a hangover'll do that to you," I responded. He winced.  
  
"Funny, I don't remember drinking much," he muttered, still holding his head. I laughed.  
  
"That's understandable," I said, pushing several strands of messy hair out of his handsome face, "you were so wasted, we could have had wild sex all night and you wouldn't remember. ....We didn't," I assured quickly, catching sight of his current expression.  
  
"Why is it that I'm none too reassured?" he asked suspiciously. I sat down next to him.  
  
"Think about this for a minute, Pretty Boy," I said. "Why would I have wanted to take advantage of you when you were drunk and wouldn't remember any of it? Personally, I'd rather seduce you when you're dead sober, so I can be sure that you, and not the liqour, find me sexually attractive. And I'd want it to stick in your head for a long time afterwards, so I could have the immense pleasure of watching you beg for more. Does that make sense?"  
  
"Actually, it does," he said, blushing. "Ugh, my head hurts like a moth- nevermind."  
  
"Poor baby," I said. "You wait here, and I'll make you some of my Auntie's headache medicine, okay?" I kissed his forehead. "Lay down. Rest."  
  
  
  
***  
  
  
  
  
  
"Okay, honey," Millerna said as she reentered the room fifteen minutes later with a steaming mug of something that looked - and smelled - incredibly like sewage. "You have to drink this." Link sat up and looked at what she had given him.  
  
"This is nasty," he said, matter-of-factly. Millerna sat next to him and rubbed his back comfortingly.  
  
"Yeah, and it tastes like shit, but it works," she said, grinning.  
  
"Oh well," Link said sadly, gazing into the swirling sludge. "It's gotta be better than this headache." He took a deep breath and downed the whole thing. This led to quite a bit of disgusted coughs and gags, but a moment later his headache was nonexistant.  
  
"See what I mean?" Millerna said, handing him a glass of water, then moving behind him to massage his shoulders. "Tastes bad, but it does what it's supposed to do."  
  
"Mmmm..." He liked the massage. In fact, it made him completely forget about the bad taste in his mouth. Shivers went up and down his spine.  
  
"Feel better?" Millerna asked a few moments later.  
  
"Yes," he sighed. She kissed his earlobe.  
  
"Good," she said. Then she realized, "You sleep naked, don't you?"  
  
  
  
  
  
***  
  
  
  
Damn that sheet. If it hadn't been there I could have seen *everything*. Still, the view of his muscular chest, stomach, and arms wasn't at all unsatisfactory. I couldn't believe I hadn't figured out until now that he was naked. I'd been too busy taking care of him to notice, probably.  
  
But my God, was he gorgeous! Every inch of him was perfectly sculpted; he looked like a statue you'd see of a deity. My heart started beating like crazy. I wouldn't have minded joining him in that bed, and we certainly wouldn't be sleeping, either.  
  
"Oh! I'm- I'm sorry," he said, blushing scarlet. "I...forgot."  
  
"No, that's fine," I breathed, barely able to control my various urges and desires. "You have nothing to be ashamed of, I can tell you that much."  
  
"It's not proper for a man to be naked around a lady," he said quickly, looking incredibly embarrassed.  
  
"Good thing I'm not a lady, then, huh?" I said, studying his beautiful body. I couldn't help it, teenage guys aren't the only ones who get horny. In fact, I probably got horny more than most teenage guys did, I just didn't let on.  
  
"Uh, I should get dressed," he said. I snapped out of it.  
  
"Um, okay."  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
(A/N- can you guess what kind of mood I was in when I wrote this? Yes, I confess, I am not immune to lust, especially for Link, and Legolas from LOTR. He's a babe, heehee.) 


	16. Goodbye to the Gorons

Millerna- Erin's starting school, Erin's starting school!!  
  
HealerAriel- You have to remind me? -_-; Geez, you don't know what hell is until you've been inside Westminster High. I don't even know where my classes are!  
  
Millerna- Heh heh, too bad! ^_^  
  
HealerAriel- You like seeing me suffer, don't you, Millerna?  
  
Millerna- ^________________^ *nods vigorously*  
  
HealerAriel- You sadistic bitch.  
  
Millerna- *baby voice* But you're a big girl now! My little baby's all grown up and starting 9th grade *sniffle* It's so beautiful!  
  
HealerAriel- What the hell do you mean, 'your little baby'? *I* created *you*! BOW TO ME, VARLOTRESS!  
  
Millerna- .....What the fuck?  
  
HealerAriel- Something you pick up from various stupid movies ^_^;; And you're not allowed to say 'fuck' in the intro.  
  
Millerna- You just did.  
  
HealerAriel- That's because I'm specialer than you.  
  
Millerna- Specialer?  
  
HealerAriel- Hey! I'm not in school YET, so I don't have to use proper English yet, either!  
  
Millerna- Moron.  
  
HealerAriel- I'd be less of a moron if you'd get me some coffee.  
  
Both- Ahhhhhhhh. Coffee! ^_^ ^_^ YAY!  
  
Millerna- Coffee is the greatest gift ever given unto womankind.  
  
HealerAriel- Yeah. Mankind can just drink their nasty, nasty Mountain Dew. Womankind gets the good stuff!  
  
Millerna- HELL YEAH! I love saying that! ^-^  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
(A/N- ......Sadly I have started school now, and updates won't be as frequent as I'd like them to be, but worry not: I'll stay up till 4 in the morning on weekends to appease you if I must! A true fanfic authoress doesn't let her fans down!)  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
I think it bothered Forest Boy that I had seen him (almost) naked. Hell, the only thing that bothered me was that he'd had something covering his - er - *special equiptment*. I would have liked to see that. I would have liked to have that at my disposal whenever I said "Go", too, but some things just aren't in the cards....Ahem, back to the subject.  
  
"I'm sorry you saw me...like that," he said embarrassedly as he emerged from his room, fully clothed. Damn, I was hoping for another look at that delicious body of his. A girl can dream...naughty, perverted dreams with no shortage of gratuitous sex scenes, but still. Ahhh, nice dreams.  
  
"Don't apologize," I said. *It got me hot,* I added silently, simply because he probably wouldn't have taken it well if I'd said such an improper thing out loud. Knowing him, he'd have run away. *Any time you wanna show me your stuff, sexy, feel free.* Nasty thoughts. I had to shake them out of my head.  
  
"No, I have to apologize," he said. "It was very improper."  
  
"Really, it didn't bother me," I replied. That was the understatement of the year. It seemed to make him feel a little better, though. That was a good thing, I guess. Maybe I'd accidentally-on-purpose see him like that again. One can only hope.  
  
  
  
***  
  
  
  
I found it strangely depressing to leave the Gorons later that day. They were so cool, and they liked you for who you were, not your social rank. Still, there was a lot more to do.  
  
"So," I said. "Where are we headed now, and how long is it going to take to get there?"  
  
"We are going to visit the forest I grew up in," he replied, "and it will take two days." I made a face.  
  
"Yay, more sleep deprivation," I cheered sarcastically. Pretty Boy smiled.  
  
"Maybe not," he said.  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
(A/N- Yes, it's short, and I apologize, but...well the next thing needs to be a seperate chapter. Don't question me!) 


	17. Night Falls

(Sabrina is from my story The New Girl in the Animorphs section. Marco is an actual character from the Animorph books, so, sadly, I don't own him. I'd LIKE to (hint, hint) but I don't. He is, like Link, Legolas form LOTR, and Raziel from Soul Reaver, one of those guys I will never be able to keep chained in my room for my own....purposes. Although...It'd be fun if I could....^___________^ )  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
HealerAriel- I would like to make it known that today, I got my first bad review on a story.  
  
Millerna- Heh, you suck!  
  
HealerAriel- Shut up, Sabrina's touchy on the subject! *has her arm around a pretty girl in all black clothes and Goth jewelry* She got dissed by a reviewer.  
  
Sabrina- *sniffles*  
  
Millerna- Nobody's ever said anything bad about me. Sabrina's just lame because she's dating a cynical Hispanic guy who turns into a big monkey at will.  
  
HealerAriel- Marco turns into a gorilla, moron. There IS a difference.  
  
Millerna- What is it?  
  
HealerAriel- ...Erm...monkeys have tails and gorillas don't? Either way, different primate. ^_^;;  
  
Millerna- Oh, this from the chick who calls the Forest Temple Moblins big gerbils? Gimme a break.  
  
Sabrina- Oh shut up, Millerna. Go screw Link.  
  
Millerna- And THIS from the tattooed Goth chick who we saw make out with the previously mentioned cynical Hispanic monkey dude in explicit detail?! I don't get no respect!  
  
HealerAriel and Sabrina- You stole that line from Rodney Dangerfield, ass!  
  
Millerna- So what? Erin gets her ideas from Mel Brooks and Monty Python.  
  
HealerAriel and Sabrina- The masters of comedy! HAIL!  
  
Millerna- Oh good God, they're speaking in unison again.... -_-;  
  
Sabrina- Erin and I happen to be very similar. Like sisters. *mood has improved slightly*  
  
HealerAriel- Yes we are! *she and Sabrina hug, and smile cheesily at Millerna* Can we be sisters who share cynical Hispanic guys?  
  
Sabrina- Don't count on it. You're too young for Marco. He knows that the guys and I would kick his ass if he ever touched a girl younger than him. It shows bad morals.  
  
Millerna *derisive snort* Again, this from YOU? Since when are you the queen of morality? I bet you and Marco have another graphic make-out scene before the end of the week, if not a graphic sex scene!  
  
Sabrina- *haughtily* I got carried away. YOU are always horny. You'll jump Link the first chance you get!  
  
Millerna- Probably, but that's not the point! The point is, I'm allowed to be obsessed with sex: I'm sixteen!  
  
Sabrina- So am I. *they exchange glances*  
  
Millerna- Wait a minute, why are Erin's protagonists always sixteen years old? *they stare at HealerAriel*  
  
HealerAriel- ^_^; Heh, call it the desperate longing for a driver's liscence!  
  
Sabrina- *dreamily* I want a Harley....  
  
HealerAriel- *dreamily* I want a T-Bird, AND a Harley....  
  
HealerAriel and Sabrina- Yeah....T-Birds and Harleys....*sigh*  
  
Millerna- Am I the only sane one here?  
  
HealerAriel- Temporarily. *she and Sabrina slap themselves* Okay, we're better now!  
  
*The man-of-the-hour himself walks in. Geez, convenient, isn't it?*  
  
Marco- Hey, HealerAriel, hey Sabrina. *sees Millerna* Who are you?  
  
Millerna- Someone who doesn't like Erin. WHY IS IT THAT SABRINA'S LOSER BOYFRIEND GETS TO BE HERE, AND LINK DOESN'T??!!  
  
Marco- Oh. You must be Millerna.  
  
Millerna- *hisses* FEAR ME, CYNICAL HISPANIC MONKEY DUDE!!  
  
HealerAriel- *pulls Marco away from Millerna* She has PMS, you'd do well to stay out of her reach. She gets really nasty when she has cramps. Sometimes her PMS results in burning corpses and people running and sceaming.  
  
Marco- Ah. Gotcha, HealerAriel.  
  
HealerAriel- *to Sabrina and Millerna* SEE!? Marco calls me HealerAriel! Why can't you guys do it?  
  
Millerna- We're your characters. It's an unwritten rule that we can't show you too much respect. I mean, hell, we live inside your head. We know everything that goes on in your twisted mind.  
  
HealerAriel- I was wondering whose voices I kept hearing all day telling me what to do...  
  
Sabrina- Yep. Millerna's the horny, psychopathic voice that tells you to kill, maim, and have dirty thoughts about guys. I'm the worldly, mysterious, creative voice that inspires you. Remember when you wrote that skit for drama? That was me, all the way. I guess you could call me a muse! *happy anime face* ^_^  
  
Marco- Uh....not following....  
  
HealerAriel- You wouldn't, you're almost normal.  
  
Marco- *nods, looking at HealerAriel like she's a moron* Yeah. Turning into animals and fighting aliens is SO normal.  
  
Sabrina- She said "almost", baby. She meant that we're weirder than you.  
  
Millerna- Pshh, he's a guy. All guys are bound to normality. FOOLS! MUAHAHAHAHA!  
  
Marco- She is so hot, and so scary.  
  
Millerna- SILENCE! I AM NOT AN OBJECT FOR MEN TO STARE AT! LOOK AT ME AND DIE, HORMONAL ADOLESCENT MALE! LOOK AT ME AND DIIIIIEEEE!!!!  
  
HealerAriel- Millerna? You didn't have any coffee this morning, did you?  
  
Millerna- NO!  
  
HealerAriel- That explains this. *pushes Starbuck's-producing button* Marco? Since you're the lowly male slave, go ask the nymph behind the counter for...uh, tell her to give us three of those things that boost Millerna's mood. *recieves a questioning look from Marco* Just do it, man.  
  
Sabrina- Not to be ANNOYING (damn that reviewer!!), but what exactly are "those things that boost Millerna's mood"?  
  
HealerAriel- Huge mugs of pure espresso, laced with cream and sugar. *sigh* Some of the best stuff on Earth.  
  
HealerAriel, Sabrina, and Millerna- Coffeeeeee....coffeeeeeee's goooooooood.....  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
(A/N- sorry about the long intro. Sabrina was depressed, and wanted to get her two cents in. Reviewers can be so cruel to Goth chicks. In fact, people are cruel to anyone who doesn't like babies. What's up with that? And yes, my Starbuck's server is a nymph. Her name is Penelope, and she has blue hair. Thank you very much.)  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
"So, what's the deal?" I asked. This warranted a strange look from Pretty Boy.  
  
"Excuse me?" he replied, most likely assuming that I'd lost my mind. I decided to specify.  
  
"I mean, in every single fairy tale concerning a helpless princess, a vicious psychopath bent on world domination, and a stupidly brave teenaged hero, it turns out the exact same way: The bad guy kidnaps the princess as bait; the loyal hero-boy goes in, kills the bad guy, saves the world, and marries the princess. Just about all of this coincides with your naive existence, Forest Boy, except for killing the bad guy and marrying the princess. Now, I get that the bad dude is currently unkillable because he has the Triforce of Insanity-"  
  
"Power," Link corrected. "But close."  
  
"-But why aren't you married to the Almighty Zelda? I mean, you do whatever she says, anyway. Why not marry her so being her pawn would make a little more sense?"  
  
"I am not her pawn," he said sulkily. I rolled my eyes.  
  
"Oh, you are SO her pawn. You're her little chess piece, riding around on your little horse, thinking you're in control of your own life, when, in actuality, Zelda is your puppetmaster. I mean, have you ever NOT done exactly what she told you to do?"  
  
"No," he grumbled. "My entire life's been pre-ordained, remember? My place in life is to follow orders. Nothing more, nothing less."  
  
"Oh. Right." I thought for a moment. To have no say in what you did with your own life...Man, it must have sucked. I'd been forced into slavery myself, but I had never actually followed orders. Well, with the exception of Ayden's commands of "Jump higher! and "LOOK at your target!" Even then I'd been stubborn as hell, especially if I was tired or in pain (which was pretty common after hours of training). But Link... He was more of a slave than I'd been. And he knew it. I couldn't help feeling kinda bad for him.  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
***  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
The sky was almost pitch-black. I yawned, and blinked my eyes rapidly, trying to rehydrate them. That's the only thing I hate about staying up later than I should - my eyes dry out.  
  
"Tired?" Link asked.  
  
"No," I lied. I felt like I needed to prove my toughness to him. I'm not even sure toughness is a word, but I was tired at the time, so I really didn't care. Link gave me a skeptical look.  
  
"Yes, you are," he said.  
  
"No, I'm not," I yawned. "I'm w-wide awake." He smiled slightly.  
  
"Come on, we'll sleep over there." He indicated an area surrounded by a circle of trees, with a slow-moving river nearby. You had to give the boy credit for his choice of location, I decided, as we dismounted our horses.  
  
"You sure can pick the spots," I commented, examining our surroundings.  
  
"Catch," he called, before tossing me a canvas bag that he'd untied from Epona's saddle (she was a workhorse, after all, and could carry more weight than Ebony). I gave him a look.  
  
"What is this?" I asked.  
  
"Stuff for you, from the Princess," he replied. I examined the contents of the bag, and found a brush and comb, a white nightgown, a change of clothes (a skirt and blouse, but I'd take what I could get if the situation got bad enough), and various other things a girl might need (hence, underwear and...er...well, stuff). I was suddenly very ashamed of my intitial impression of Zelda. She wasn't bad, really.  
  
"Why would she do anything for me?" I asked. "She hardly knows me. Hell, the people who DO know me hardly ever go to any trouble for me."  
  
"Not all people are bad, Millerna," he said simply, laying out bed- like stuff.  
  
"Not all people are good either," I said softly, gazing up at the night sky. It was a warm night, but I felt a chill as I began to count all of the bad people in my life. My father, for giving me as a whore; my mother, for not doing anything to stop him; Carlos and his minions; a certain ex-friend I didn't care to even think about. Just picturing that fakey-sweet smile, those rosy cheeks, those coniving blue eyes...it made me sick, how she'd betrayed me. Pretending to be my friend, when in reality she was spreading rumors behind my back. That evil slut, Genevieve...  
  
I sighed, and counted the good people. My sisters; my Aunt Miranda, whom I loved more dearly than any relative, who had given me the small silver ring I treasured, as well as the knowledge to use plants and flowers to heal - or to cause harm; the Zora princess who'd been my friend as a child, who had tried so hard to help me escape from my fate, but failed nonetheless; Malon, who had given me coffee and a place to sleep (you give me good coffee, you're automatically on my "Good" list); Link, who, though I hated to admit it, I owed a hell of a lot to; Zelda, who had been generous to a girl she didn't even know.  
  
And Ayden. I stared straight up into the blackness, trying to blink back the tears. Ayden. The man who had taught me how to protect myself, to survive. The best and truest friend I had ever had. The first man I had ever trusted. The one I couldn't help, even with my knowledge of healing, as he lay dying from the arrow wound. I could still see the blood in my mind. Hear his labored breathing. I still had nightmares.  
  
"Millerna," Link said, sounding shocked, "you're crying." I wiped my eyes violently.  
  
"I am not crying," I snapped. A lie is no good if your voice is shaking and tears are still streaming down your face.  
  
"Yes, you are," he said, taking my face in his hands. God, he was so gentle. He looked at me with concerned blue eyes. "What's wrong?"  
  
"You wouldn't understand," I said, jerking away from him. His hands were comforting, and I wasn't in the mood to be comforted.  
  
"No, I won't, not if you don't tell me," he said logically. I wasn't in the mood for logic, either.  
  
"And I don't intend to tell you," I said, grabbing the nightgown out of my bag. "I intend to get changed, and go to sleep. That's it."  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
(A/N- there will be very interesting things in the next chapter, I assure you. I just had to cut this short, because it's getting late, and I wanted to get a chapter posted so you didn't think I was deserting you. Loveya!) 


	18. Fear and Desire

HealerAriel- Ugh. Tired.  
  
Millerna- Then go to bed, stupid. Geez, it's not like someone's forcing you to stay up till the wee hours of morning. You chose to do it!  
  
HealerAriel- But I can't let my fans down!  
  
Millerna- *rolls eyes* Erin, you let me down all the time. By not letting me see Link naked!  
  
HealerAriel- I don't know if I can let you see him naked. Fanfiction.net is putting all these crazy censors on stories. NC-17 fics aren't allowed anymore. And those were some of the good ones! You may not get to see him naked, and you may not get to do him.  
  
Millerna- So unfair! *pouts* Hmm...maybe I could see him while he's bathing in a pond or something...He'd still be naked, but the water would cover him.  
  
HealerAriel- That would depend on how deep the water was, though.  
  
Millerna- ...Just a few inches below his belly button. Perfect water level. Mmmmmmm...  
  
HealerAriel- Oooooh, imagine that perfectly toned stomach. Yummy.  
  
Millerna- And all nice and wet, too... *shivers*  
  
Both- O_O *drool*  
  
  
  
  
  
(A/N- Ahem! Enough of that! *blushes* Sorry it took this long for an update, but I was dead tired last night, and couldn't stay awake even to finish the intro! By the way, I saw "Jekyll and Hyde: The Musical" tonight at a dinner theater, and I swear to you, it is awsome! I didn't expect to like it half as much as I did (I had to see a professional play and do a write-up on it for my Drama class.) Anyway, I had quite a bit of high- octane coffee during dinner, so I'm wide awake right now at 1:33 AM. ^_^ Coffee is a wonderful, wonderful thing. I don't know what I would do without it. Oh, and by the by, it's a full moon, so OWOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! Heh heh. No, I'm not entirely sane. Although I'm not as psychotic as Millerna is *dodges a few punches and kicks* Sheesh, Millerna, sorry! Onto chapter 18, which should definitely be rated R.)  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
Link was laying on his back with his arms behind his head when Millerna returned, wearing her new nightgown. And, as Link noticed soon afterwards, it was a very thin, very white nightgown that really didn't conceal much, despite its length. And he really didn't mind... Millerna, however, was a little dissapointed that the only clothing he'd taken off was his baggy green tunic, hat, and boots. She'd been rather looking forward to him wearing much less.  
  
"So, where'd you bug get to?" Millerna asked, noting the complete absence of the annoying fairy.  
  
"She has gone to tell the Kokiri of our arrival tomorrow and, apparently, to meet up with some old friends," he answered. Millerna rolled her eyes.  
  
"Ah, an insect convention," she said, laying down in the makeshift bed next to him. "How charming." He laughed.  
  
"Goodnight, Millerna." There were about three minutes of silence, before,  
  
"Uh, Forest Boy?"  
  
"Mmm?"  
  
"There aren't, like, any...*things* that come out at night here in Zelda-Land, are there?"  
  
"Probably not," he said nonchalantly.  
  
"But...but if there ARE, are they dangerous? Will they attack us?" Link smirked and looked over at her.  
  
"Are you afraid of the dark, Millerna?" he teased.  
  
"NO!" she insisted defensively. "I'm just a little nervous about sleeping outside...on the ground...with no protection against whatever creepy Hyrulian monsters come out at night. With...big teeth and...glowing red eyes." She gasped as a howl rang through the air. Looking at her now, Link was reminded that, as dangerous, sarcastic, and reckless as Millerna was, she was still just a young girl.  
  
"Millerna? Would you feel safer if you were closer to me?"  
  
"Maybe."  
  
"Get in with me then," he said. She did so, not sure how well he could protect her, but grateful nonetheless. She jumped as another howl sounded.  
  
"Y-you're sure you can fight those things off if you have to?"  
  
"Millerna, it's okay. I'll take care of you," he said softly, wrapping an arm around her to emphasize this. "Just get some sleep, okay?"  
  
"Okay," she said. She cuddled up to him, lay her head on his chest, and was asleep within seconds. Link smiled and stroked her silky hair.  
  
"Right now," he whispered, "you could almost be mistaken as sweet." As much as he wanted to go to sleep, he couldn't seem to stop looking at her. And he wanted desperately to see what was under that thin nightgown. Wanted desperately to explore her. It was wrong to have such thoughts, though, and he tried to push them out of his mind, but they didn't go away.  
  
After a few minutes, curiosity got the better of him. He pulled the blanket off of her slightly, and admired her. Her breasts weren't at all concealed by the paper-thin, white fabric. He'd never seen any woman's chest so exposed before, and he was (being a fairly pure, but teenaged male) captivated by what he was now seeing.  
  
"You're so beautiful," he breathed, slowly sliding his hand from her shoulder to her hips, feeling all of her pleasant curves. "And paranoid," he added, as his hand struck the knife she'd fastened to her thigh. Assuring himself that it couldn't possibly be comfortable to sleep with a hard metal object strapped to one's leg, he removed the knife. His hand lingered between her thighs for longer than it should have, though, and he felt guilty for enjoying the feel of her soft flesh so much. He felt guiltier still for the intense longing to move his hand further up. To taste her, and to hear her moans of desire and rapture as he did so.  
  
*No,* he told himself firmly. *Stop thinking like the castle guards!* He (reluctantly) covered her with the blanket again. He couldn't resist kissing her face and neck a few times before going to sleep.  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
***  
  
  
  
  
  
I woke up in the middle of the night, and was initially freaked out by the fact that I was sleeping with a man. The reason behind my sleeping with him soon came back to me, though, and I calmed down. I liked having his strong arms around me; feeling the warmth of his body against mine. It was nice. Beyond nice. I loved it.  
  
Knowing that he was asleep, I slipped my hand under his shirt. My fingers found his belly button, his perfect stomach muscles, his nipples. I was getting somewhat less than composed at the moment. That, of course, being a ferocious understatement. I wanted him so badly. I had the crazy urge to wake him up right then and beg him to have me.  
  
*He would panic,* I decided, pushing his shirt aside, and bending to place a long kiss on his belly button. I smiled, wondering if he'd feel it in his dreams. I'd had very...explicit dreams that night. Mostly about him. I smoothed the his shirt back down, and kissed his nipples through the fabric. Don't even ask me why. I explained before that I get really, really...yeah. I'll stop there. I snuggled up to him, and went back to sleep.  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
(A/N- again, guess what kind of a mood I was in when this chapter came into being? ^_^;; I'm a teenager, after all...) 


	19. Navi Finds Out, and A LongAwaited Talk

Millerna- *reads Chapter 18 and blushes* He thinks like that? About me? Heeheeheehee! ^_^  
  
HealerAriel- Dammit, don't tell me you're going to be acting like a cheerleader with a crush all day.  
  
Millerna- Oh shut up. Oooooooh, I'd let him do all he wanted! *giggles girlishly*  
  
HealerAriel- Good lord... -_-; What happened to the sadistic bitch I once knew?  
  
Millerna- She found out the Hero of Time has naughty thoughts about her, that's what. *dreamy grin she usually only gets from very strong, very good coffee*  
  
HealerAriel- *groans* Since Millerna's going to be acting like a lovesick schoolgirl all week, we may as well cut the intro short. Sheesh, Millerna!  
  
Millerna- *drools, imagining Link naked, as usual* Uh huh.  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
(A/N- I knew Millerna was unstable. I knew it! I knew it! Ahem. Onto chapter 19!)  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
"WHAT DID YOU DO?!" Link and I bolted upright at the same time to face a very pissed off Navi. I wondered what she could possibly be so bitchy about, before realizing that she had just seen her partner - whom she had been with since he was ten years old - cuddled up with me.  
  
"Navi, it's not what it looks like," Link said quickly, sounding remarkably like a little boy whose mother had caught him doing something very naughty. Navi ignored him and ranted on,  
  
"Ooh, I should have known better than to leave you alone with this...this little tramp!" I felt my cheeks burn.  
  
"Watch your language, you filthy mosquito," I snapped. "If I had a flyswatter with me you'd be dead by now."  
  
"You've been on my list from day one, sister; don't push your luck!" the bug replied.  
  
"Oh, you want a piece of me, little gnat? I'm right here, come and get me!"  
  
"WOULD YOU BOTH SHUT UP!" Link yelled. I had never heard him yell, nor, apparently, had Navi. We both got real quiet, real fast, and just kinda stared at him. He took a few deep breaths and continued, "Navi, stop jumping to conclusions, and Millerna, stop being so hostile." Me? Hostile? But the bug had started it! He knew that!  
  
"But-" I started to protest, but he cut me off.  
  
"Navi, would you please allow Millerna and I to speak privately?"  
  
"WHAT?! After what happened the last time I left you alone with her? Do you think I'm crazy?!" the bug raged.  
  
"Stop treating me like a child, Navi," he said calmly. "I'm not one anymore." The insect sputtered in shock and anger, before zooming away, looking incredibly pissed off.  
  
"Inch-high annoyance," I muttered.  
  
"She doesn't like you either, Millerna," Link pointed out. I snarled.  
  
"Yeah, well the next time she calls me a little tramp, I'm trapping her in a bottle and finding a frog to feed her to," I grumbled. He put his hand on my shoulder.  
  
"I know. She shouldn't have called you that. I was the one who invited you to sleep with me."  
  
"Well, damn, it's not like we did anything," I said. *That you knew of*, I added silently. He looked embarrassed.  
  
"Still...we shouldn't do that again. Sleep together, I mean. There are certain...temptations that might arise." He was blushing. Why the hell would *he* be blushing? He was the picture of purity! I was the one who had considered...nevermind.  
  
"We should...get going," he said, breaking the rather uncomfortable silence.  
  
"Uh...yeah," I said. No sooner had I gotten to my feet than,  
  
"Millerna! You're bleeding!" And indeed, there was a bloodstain on my semi-transparent nightgown. And I knew exactly why.  
  
"Fuck!" I hissed. "Excuse me a minute, would you?"  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
***  
  
  
  
  
  
(A/N- Ah, a scene long-awaited: It is explained to Link the...erm...workings of nature. No sleazy stuff, though. Just a sex-ed lesson. I think.)  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
I hate having my period. It is the bane of my existance. But even worse, once I'd washed the blood off of myself, taken care of blood- catching supplies (which had graciously been given to me by the Princess. I now officially almost liked her), and gotten dressed, I found that I would have to explain what was going on. The first thing out of Link's mouth when I got back was,  
  
"Are you okay?"  
  
"I'm fine," I assured.  
  
"But...but you were bleeding. What happened? Did you get hurt?"  
  
"No. The bleeding thing...it's natural for girls. It's supposed to happen. I hate it, but it's normal." This made Link look even more confused, if that was possible.  
  
"Why does it happen?" he asked. I felt myself start to blush. Hoo boy, this was going to be embarrassing.  
  
"Well, um...it...it means that a girl...can have children."  
  
"Oh. Does it happened all a girl's life?"  
  
"No. It starts when she...well, I had it for the first time when I was almost thirteen. And," I held up my left hand, "my Aunt, she gave me my ring to celebrate that I'd become a woman. It's kind of silly, making a celebration out of me being able to get pregnant, but...I don't know. It made me feel pretty special. And I love my ring," I added, mostly to myself, as I admired my beautiful silver ring, made up of a pattern of swirls.  
  
"Um, Millerna?"  
  
"Yeah?"  
  
"H-how would you get pregnant? I mean, does it just happen?"  
  
"Uh...no...not...exactly," I said nervously. "Um...maybe we should sit down, this may take a while." I sat down on a patch of very soft grass under a tree, and motioned for him to join me. And I explained in very gentle terms exactly what had to happen for a girl to become pregnant (I was quite proud of myself, actually. I winded up making it sound...kind of romantic. Then again, I had simply explained to him the way Ayden had explained to me, and Ayden had always been a romantic).  
  
"Oh," he said, looking even more embarrassed. "That explains a lot..."  
  
"What?  
  
"Nothing."  
  
"Ah. Any further questions?"  
  
"Not at the moment, no," he replied, still blushing.  
  
"In that case, shall we pack up our horses and get outta here? We'll make it to the forest by nightfall, right?"  
  
Yeah," he said. Thus, we gathered our stuff and got our furry friends ready for a long day of walking on their part. I noticed him glancing at me from time to time. Then finally, after having ridden for about an hour (with the bug still nowhere in sight), he voiced what he'd been thinking.  
  
"Why do you have those?" he blurted.  
  
"Why do I have what?" I asked. He blushed again, then motioned quickly toward my chest, and repeated,  
  
"Why? I mean, I know about a million terms for them - from the guards - but I don't know what they're for."  
  
"I...I...God, Forest Boy, isn't this something you could have asked Zelda about?"  
  
"Are you kidding? She'd either think I was a pervert, or think I was coming on to her. Either way, the option isn't very attractive. The only women I can ask about things like this are the Gerudos and you." Okay, that made me feel kinda special, in a weird way.  
  
"Okay then," I said. "See, if, strictly hypothetically, you and I had a baby, my body would make milk to feed it and...yeah, it's the same thing as with cows, only instead of udders I have very small breasts."  
  
"Ah."  
  
"...Why do you ask?"  
  
"No reason. And...don't complain about your breasts. They're pretty." Unbelievable. The boy could say something that would make any other guy sound like a jerk, and he could make it sound sweet, and strangely innocent. I blushed.  
  
"Thanks."  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
(A/N- Stay tuned. Kokiri Forest in the next chapter!) 


	20. Kokiri Forest and Bad Dreams

Millerna: One question, Erin.  
  
HealerAriel: What would that be?  
  
Millerna: Why is it that you can update other stories during the week, but you only update MY story at night on the weekend?  
  
HealerAriel: Ah, there are two good reasons for that, my semi-psychotic friend; One is that it takes me more time and effort to write this story-  
  
Millerna: Well, yeah, I'm complex, man.  
  
HealerAriel: -And two is that I can write whatever I want once Mom, Dad, and Mark are asleep. Otherwise I feel weird about writing graphic stuff. That's why.  
  
Millerna: The scary thing is, that almost made sense to me. But I still don't like that you spend more time on that Zoids story of yours. Van's been bragging all week about getting more attention. I'm about to kick his ass!  
  
HealerAriel: Not a good idea. Van is two years older than you, has a body like a rock, and also has a big ass robot kitty at his disposal.  
  
Millerna: Yeah? And I've got martial arts training and my period. I'll cream him. And whenever you start another Zoids story - because I know you will - I'll cream Bit, too! Although...he's...hot.  
  
HealerAriel: I know....  
  
Both: (begin daydreaming about Link, Bit, and Van in minimal clothing...VERY minimal clothing...) *sigh*  
  
HealerAriel: You know, the only reason I watch Zoids is because the guys are so damn sexy - for anime characters, I mean.  
  
Millerna: Uh huh. I'll watch it with you from now on. But for the time being, can you get to MY story?  
  
HealerAriel: Bossy...  
  
  
  
  
  
(A/N- Yaaaaay! A new chapter!)  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
Navi seemed to have taken personal offense at Link's request for privacy, because I didn't see her all the rest of the day. Not that I was complaining. It was quite nice not to have her around, squeaking out orders. We reached the forest by midnight without fairyish intervention.  
  
We left our horses outside the entrance to the forest (the Kokiri had a thing about horses, Link had explained), and...well...entered. One note: the Kokiri Forest is absolutely gorgeous. I instantly liked it, not only for the clear, shallow ponds, soft green grass, and cute houses, but for the overall sense of peace in the air. I know I'm not usually a 'peace' person, but still, it was cool.  
  
"This is where you grew up, huh?" I said. Forest Boy smiled.  
  
"Yep."  
  
"It's nice."  
  
"So are the inhabitants," he informed, pointing to a few children dressed in green clothing.  
  
"They're little kids!" I said, shocked.  
  
"Yeah. You see, the Kokiri are immortal, they never grow up," Link explained. "Never die, either, to the extent of my knowledge." Immortal. God, what I'd give to be immortal.  
  
"Link!" a little boy yelled, running up to him. "We missed you!" Then, of course, he saw me. Stated again: What am I, transparent?  
  
"Who's the lady, Link?" the boy asked, eyeing me suspiciously. For a second I thought of doing something to scare the little guy, but reminded myself that it was time to start acting like an adult. Still, it would've been a hell of a lot of fun. Yeah, so I'm a bitch, who cares?  
  
"This is my friend Millerna, Jacob," Link said, subconciously bending down to the boy's level. Jacob nodded.  
  
"She's pretty," he said. I smiled, mainly at Link's expression.  
  
"Pretty frightening is more like it," Link muttered. "Well, anyway, it's getting late. The pretty psychopath and I should get some sleep." Jacob's face lit up.  
  
"Oh! We've fixed your house up, too!" he informed proudly, leading us over to a house that couldn't be seen from the entrance of the little village.  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
***  
  
  
  
  
  
The Kokiri had, indeed, fixed up Link's house. The original thing was now a sort of loft, with a bigger house built onto the bottom.  
  
"This is great, Jacob!" Link exclaimed. "I'll have to thank everyone tomorrow." Jacob smiled.  
  
"My idea," he said, looking very pleased with himself.  
  
"You're a talented architect," Millerna complimented, looking around the house. Now Jacob was positively beaming.  
  
"Thank you, milady!" he chirped. "Ah! I should get to bed, too. Remember, Link? Tomorrow night's the Moon Festival!"  
  
"I remember, Jacob. Thank you."  
  
"Goodnight then," the boy said, backing out into the moonlit forest. He bowed to Millerna, blushed, and ran off. Link found this very amusing.  
  
"Looks like you have an admirer, Millerna," he teased as he laid back on the new bed, testing it.  
  
"He's cute, but he's way too young for me," she replied, flopping down next to him. "Oooh, comfy. Then again, anything's comfy when your ass has been in a saddle all day." Link groaned.  
  
"Not that I don't agree whole-heartedly, but try to use language that's a little less harsh around here. The Kokiri are very innocent."  
  
"Gotcha," she sighed, closing her eyes. "Mmmmm, so tired..."  
  
"Millerna?"  
  
"Yeah?"  
  
"We can't sleep in the same bed."  
  
"God, Forest Boy, screw the damn fairy, I really don't care if she gets bitchy about it again. I just want to go to sleep." Link shook his head.  
  
"No. There's still a bed upstairs. You can sleep there."  
  
"Geez, fine then," Millerna grumbled, picking herself up and grudgingly climbing into the loft. "And I WILL remember this if YOU ever need a favor from ME!" she called down.  
  
  
  
***  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
"Why must we wait so long?! Can we not just kill him now?!" Ganondorf rolled his eyes at this outburst.  
  
"I truly cannot believe I'm working with you, Mr. Carlos," he said. "You are quite a stupid son of a bitch. I wouldn't do that, if I were you," he added, as the other man's hand flew to the machete tied at his waist. "You don't want me as your enemy." Carlos paled and withdrew his hand.  
  
"Then answer me, King of Evil," he said. "Why do we wait to kill the boy?!"  
  
"I'll have you know, I find the boy's escapades to be quite amusing," Ganondorf admitted. "Though he is my enemy, I do find him fascinating to observe."  
  
"You watch him? How?"  
  
"Like this." Ganondorf produced a large sword (A/N- the sword he has in Super Smash Brothers Melee, by the way), and cut a slash into the very air. The slash began to glow, and at the same time spread apart to show clearly a handsome young man.  
  
  
  
  
  
***  
  
  
  
  
  
"No....." he mumbled. Link had been talking in his sleep and thrashing around wildly for a while.  
  
"Hey," I whispered, taking him by the shoulders and gently shaking him. He gasped and sat upright, breathing hard.  
  
"Wh-what happened?" he asked. Then, "Oh, I was just...dreaming." I sat down next to him and put my arm around him.  
  
"You were having another nightmare?"  
  
"Yeah," he muttered, rubbing his eyes. "Ugh, not good to dream about getting hacked to pieces."  
  
"I guess not," I said as gently as I could. Then I realized he was shaking. I hugged him.  
  
"Millerna?" he said.  
  
"Hmm?"  
  
"Can...can you stay with me?"  
  
"Oh, sweetie, of course I can." I lay down with him and propped myself up with a few pillows behind my back. Then he surprised me by wrapping his arms around my belly and, like a small child, laying his head on my breast. I let him.  
  
"Thank you," he whispered.  
  
"Shh," I said, stroking his hair. "Just go to sleep, baby, okay?" I bent and kissed his head. He was so sweet. I couldn't help adoring him when he was like this. Maybe I have some deep-rooted maternal instinct after all...  
  
Then again, maybe I just liked holding him.  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
(A/N- So sorry it took so long, but my internet's been acting weird, and my dear sweet mother just fixed it today. My apologies.) 


	21. Kokiris Are Very Observant

Millerna: Oh, thanks, Erin. Now they'll all think I've gone soft.  
  
HealerAriel: Hey, you got to cuddle Link, which is more than I get. Be grateful.  
  
Millerna: *grumbles* Why can't I kiss him?  
  
HealerAriel: Because I said so.  
  
Millerna: You say a lot of things! Does anyone listen?  
  
HealerAriel: No. But only because they don't understand my true superiority! HAHAHA! Bow to me, puny mortals!  
  
Millerna: -_-; Erin, you are so strange at two in the morning.  
  
HealerAriel: *deep in thought* I still really, really, really want to write a Bit/Leena lemon...  
  
Millerna: They don't allow NC17 shit, and WOULD YOU SHUT UP ABOUT THOSE DAMN ANNOYING ZOIDS PEOPLE??!! Those guys piss me off!  
  
HealerAriel: Why?  
  
Millerna: ....'Cause Bit won't let me drive his robot kitty....neither will Van....or Irvine....*sniffle* All I wanna do is drive a robot kitty, dammit!  
  
HealerAriel: Oh, please. It's easy to weasel the guys into letting you drive. I've done it loads of times.  
  
Millerna: Don't make me hate you.......How did you do that?  
  
HealerAriel: Watch and learn, Millerna. *opens up a shibby little compartment on the arm of her chair. There are little red "call buttons" inside, labled with the names of Zoids, Harry Potter, Animorph, Zelda, and Soul Reaver characters. HealerAriel pressed the button labled "Bit"*  
  
Millerna: Again, a cool feature you never told me about...  
  
*a really cute blond guy with green eyes comes into the room*  
  
Bit: You rang?  
  
HealerAriel: Yeah. I have to ask you something. *goes up to him and puts her arms around his neck* Can I pretty please drive your big kitty?  
  
Bit: *grins in that uber-charming way he has* What'll I get out of it?  
  
HealerAriel: Hugs, kisses, and all the junk food you want. *bats eyelashes*  
  
Millerna: Oh my God...*rolls eyes*  
  
Bit: That works for me, babe. Can I get a few cookies in advance?  
  
HealerAriel: I'll have Penelope send some cookies to your room. *motions toward the nymph at the Starbucks' counter who is boredly leafing though Glamour* Does that work?  
  
Bit: Can I have one more thing in advance?  
  
HealerAriel: What did you have in mind? *Bit leans in and kisses her*  
  
Millerna: And she says I'm horny...  
  
*HealerAriel and Bit are still kissing*  
  
Millerna: I mean, God, she should write a lemon between Bit and herself.  
  
*yep, still kissing*  
  
Millerna: This is no fun when you don't have anyone to talk to.  
  
*they haven't stopped yet*  
  
Millerna: You know, he only finds her attractive because she wrote herself that way. In real life she's awful plain. Here she's Aphrodite, for crying out loud. Vain little...  
  
HealerAriel: *through Bit's lips* Shut up, Millerna.  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
(A/N- Bit. Yay. I love him, even though he is an idiot sometimes on the show. I love Van and Irvine, too. Millerna would, but she has yet to learn the art of manipulation to get rides in big kitties. Oh well. It'll click eventually. Anyways, onto a new chapter!)  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
Eventually I was woken up by the pale sunlight coming through the blinds. I couldn't quite bring myself to get out of bed, though. I was too comfortable, for one thing; and for another, the most beautiful boy in existance was still cuddled closely to me. I ran my fingers through his soft hair as he began to wake up.  
  
"Hey, sweetie," I said as quietly as I could.  
  
"Mmmmm....'morning," he replied groggily, his head still resting on my chest. He hugged me tighter around the middle. He reminded me so much of a young child sometimes. So sweet and innocent and trusting. Not to mention the fact that he'd had me in his bed twice, and nothing had happened between us. Well, I take that back, things had happened, but he wasn't awake at the time. 'Man, now I feel dirty,' I thought guiltily. 'He's such an angel, and I'm such the opposite.' I shook off my guilt.  
  
"How'd you sleep?" I asked. 'Good lord, what's happening to me?' I demanded of myself. 'Am I being NICE?! This boy's poisoning my mind!' Eh. I didn't really care at the moment.  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
***  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
Zelda sighed, staring out her window. It had been a week since Link and Millerna had set off, and the Princess of Hyrule missed her best friend.  
  
"Your best friend," she said to herself. "Stop fooling yourself, Princess. Goddesses, what can I do? It's not fair. Why does SHE have to be the one to win his heart?" But of course, she knew why. Link had no idea, but it was all part the prophecy. His prophecy. Zelda slammed her fist down onto her window seat.  
  
"Something wrong, Your Majesty?" a soft voice called from the doorway. Zelda turned and smiled at the young redhead.  
  
"Just Zelda, Malon," she said. "We are friends. I didn't know you were coming today." Malon shrugged.  
  
"I had to deliver the milk. Dad's been sick, so he couldn't bring it."  
  
"Oh, I'm sorry."  
  
"He's getting much better, don't worry," Malon replied, smiling. "So, back to my previous question, is anything bothering you?" Zelda motioned for her to sit down.  
  
"Not really. Well, there has been a bit of something on my mind, but..." Malon gave her a knowing smile.  
  
"I'm a little jealous of her, too," she said. Zelda blushed.  
  
"You are...referring to Link's friend Millerna?"  
  
"Of course I am."  
  
"Ah. So...how do you know her?" Zelda asked. Malon giggled.  
  
"Link brought her to the ranch soon after he'd found her," she said. "Pretty little thing. Mouth like a sailor, though," she added, shaking her head disapprovingly.  
  
"And that habit she has of dressing like a boy," Zelda added. "There's nothing remotely ladylike about her."  
  
"Link seems to like her," Malon said. "He seems to like her a lot."  
  
"And do you know what I think I hate most about her?" Zelda quizzed. "She's perfect for him."  
  
"I know."  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
***  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
"You have such pretty hair, Miss Millerna," one of the Kokiri girls (Marianne) said. Two of the girls were in the house, preparing me for thier little festival thingie. Actually, we were moreso sitting around talking, except for the girl who'd insisted upon doing my hair. Forest Boy was out doing something.  
  
"Thank you," I replied. Marianne and her apparent twin (Ilana) sighed.  
  
"You're so lucky," Marianne said. "You can get married and have babies someday."  
  
"We can't," Ilana added.  
  
"Yeah, but you don't get your period, or have...confusing feelings about certain people," I said, blushing. They both remained silent for a few moments, studying me.  
  
"Are you going to marry Link?" Marianne asked, as she put another braid in my hair. I laughed.  
  
"Why do you ask?" I replied. Geez, little girls and romance...  
  
"Because he's in love with you," Ilana said simply. I felt my cheeks burn.  
  
"He is most certainly not in love with me," I insisted. "Your Affection-O-Meters are malfunctioning spectacularly." Ilana shook her head.  
  
"You don't see the way he looks at you, do you?" she said. "I've never seen him look at anybody like that before."  
  
"Sure," I said. Let the kids believe what they want to. Never did anyone any harm.  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
***  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
Meanwhile, in the Lost Woods, Link was hanging out with the boys while they tried (somewhat vainly) to catch a few fish for dinner. He was there in case they actually caught something, since none of them liked gutting fish very much. To tell the truth, he found it gross too, but he didn't mind doing it if he had to.  
  
"Grrrrrrr!" Mido growled, as another fish got itself off his hook. Link chuckled.  
  
"I see now why you guys are predominantly vegetarian," he teased, laying back on the grass near the pond.  
  
"Well, you try it, then!" Mido snapped irritably.  
  
"Hey, I don't care one way or the other," Link replied. "I don't like fish."  
  
"They're not so bad," Jacob said, baiting his hook once again. "I wouldn't want fish everyday, but it's a change from having vegetables all the time."  
  
"I would want fish everyday," a boy named Todd spoke up. "I love fish."  
  
"What does Miss Millerna like? After all, she's our guest, and we should make a good impression... Don't you think?" Jacob asked Link, blushing. Link grinned.  
  
"If I didn't know any better, Jacob," he said, "I'd think you were developing a crush on Millerna."  
  
"M-me?" Jacob stammered. "N-no, of course not!"  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
***  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
I stood on the hill over the village, leaning on a wooden fence to watch the Kokiri do their little festival dance-y thing. The feast preceeding had been compiled entirely of vegetables and fruit (from which I had purloined a ripe pomegranate to bring with me up on my lookout. Pomegranates good. Coffee better; but pomegranates still good), since the boys had virtually no fishing skills, therefore there was no cooking of fish. Not that that bothered me. I hate fish, unless it be shellfish or sushi, which are very tasty.  
  
"Hey," Forest Boy said, coming to stand next to me. I nodded, and we stood in silence for several long moments. "You look nice tonight, by the way. I didn't tell you that earlier." My cheeks warmed considerably. It seemed that everyone I was meeting - with the exception of the Gorons - wanted to dress me up like their own personal doll. My outfit consisted of a fairly thin green sheath that came to my ankles, a sash around my waist in another shade of green (the Kokiri like green, by the way), and plain sandles that, upon inspection, were obviously made of various plant fibers woven together. I honestly didn't find it all that breathtaking, but as long as he liked it...Well, I could put up with it for a while.  
  
"Aw, that was a compliment, Pretty Boy," I teased, more gently than I'd intended to. I could have smacked myself with a frying pan! I was losing my edge! He grinned.  
  
"Yeah, I guess it was," he replied. Then he let out that deep, soft chuckle that made me want to melt. "You'd better watch out, though. Jacob's become positively smitten with you." I laughed.  
  
"As previously stated, he's a little young for my tastes," I said. "It's kind of flattering to have a 'secret admirer', though." Link made a point of not looking directly at me, and said,  
  
"You probably have more admirers than you'd expect."  
  
"Oh, really now?" I replied, breaking my pomegranate open and popping a few of the seeds into my mouth (A/N- and for those of you who don't know, the seeds are what you eat. They're each incased in a little pouchy of juice, and they're yummyful). "Like who?" He blushed slightly.  
  
"How would I know?"  
  
"Well, you're my source of information here," I explained, scooping out some more pomegranate seeds and offering them to him. He reached out to take them. I decided to feed them to him myself. He didn't seem to mind in the least. Which launched me into some damn romantic daydream that I wanted dearly to escape from.  
  
"Oh, so now I keep tabs on every single person who finds you attractive?" he teased. "That's not my job."  
  
"No, I guess not." Complete and total silence. I looked up at the black sky and watched those little dots of light hover around. Maybe they were fairies...? Nah, they weren't pissing me off. Forest Boy was looking at me strangely. A shock went through my body. Was Ilana right about him?  
  
"Uh," he started. "I'm...I'm gonna go check on the horses. You should get to sleep."  
  
"Okay. Whatever," I replied. He began to walk away, but came back. He put his arms around my waist, and I literally stopped breathing. He kissed my cheek.  
  
"Goodnight," he said. I looked up at him, probably blushing bright red.  
  
"Uh-huh," I replied stupidly.  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
(A/N- Heh heh, looks like Jacob's not the only one with a crush! ^_^ Ooooooooooooooooh!) 


	22. Near Kisses and More Navi Hatred

A/N- I AM SO SORRY! You can all hit me if you like for not updating in such a long time, but I had no inspiration! And I'm sorry this chapter sucks so bad, but I'm having a bit of a writer's block, and I don't know how to escape from it. I'd written meself into a corner, and this utterly awful chapter was the only way to get the story moving again! Please forgive me! I still love you all!!!  
Link got into his house as quietly as possible after checking on the horses. He'd somewhat expected Millerna to claim the downstairs bed, and she had. He didn't mind that much, really, since Navi was preoccupied with the other fairies and wouldn't come in to be a pain.  
  
'Goddesses, she's beautiful,' he thought. The moonlight streaming in from the window near the bed shone on Millerna's fair skin, making her appear to glow, and her long hair was spread out on the pillow like a jet black halo. 'Amazing, how something so mean can be so beautiful. But...she's been sweet lately. Well, at times, at least.'  
  
He proceeded to pull off his outer clothing and disarm himself, then climbed into bed. Millerna opened her dark green eyes at him.  
  
"No fair, I call the bed tonight," she complained. Link smiled.  
  
"You wanna fight over it?"  
  
"You couldn't take me, Pretty Boy. I'd kick your ass in five seconds."  
  
"Speaking of, can you please remove the knives I'm sure you have on you? I don't want you to stab me if you have a bad dream." Millerna pouted.  
  
"Ruin all my fun, why don't you," she grumbled, nevertheless extracting the first knife from her bodice and pulling up her nightgown to unfasten the second from her thigh. She handed them to him.  
  
"Just out of curiosity," Link said, as he placed the knives under the bed, "why DO you sleep with knives?"  
  
"Paranoia," Millerna yawned, snuggling up to him. Link shrugged.  
  
"That works," he replied, wrapping his arms around her and holding her close. "Goodnight."  
  
"Mmm..." was the only response as Millerna found a comfortable place to lay her head on his chest and closed her eyes. After only seconds, her deep breathing showed that she'd already fallen asleep.  
  
"I wish I could get to sleep that quick," Link muttered (A/N- you're not alone, man), looking at the girl in his arms. Not for the first time, he wondered if maybe he was falling in love with her. Then again, he wasn't sure how you could tell that you were in love. Maybe it had something to do with that funny feeling he kept getting in his stomach whenever he thought about her, or the way his heart skipped a few beats when she smiled? Or perhaps the fact that her smooth lips looked more and more inviting with every passing second...  
***  
"How DARE he, that damn kid! SHE'S MINE! HE CAN'T HAVE HER!" Ganondorf rolled his eyes at this outburst.  
  
"Calm yourself, sir," he said, rubbing his forehead in agitation. Why was the mighty King of Evil cursed to have such incompetent imbeciles in his service? 'If they'd been any good the first time,' he lamented, 'the boy and the princess would be dead, and I would reign supreme. Why do I get the sinking feeling that this stupid son of a bitch is even LESS competent then the others?'  
  
"CALM MYSELF?! THAT LITTLE BASTARD IS CLAIMING HER RIGHT IN FRONT OF MY EYES, AND YOU TELL ME TO CALM MYSELF?!" Carlos raged. "SHE'LL BE NO GOOD BY THE TIME I GET HER BACK!"  
  
"If all you care to do is sleep with a young girl, Carlos, why don't you simply find a village maid to rape?" Ganondorf suggested. "I assure you that it would be easier, and I would be much less likely to get pissed off and kill you."  
  
"You would kill the one who saved you from your imprisonment?"  
  
"I am THIS close," Ganondorf assured, stroking the hilt of his sword. All the color drained from Carlos's face. He swallowed hard.  
  
"Y-yes, I see. I will go find that village maid now..."  
  
"Very good."  
***  
"Millerna? It's time to get up," Link informed, shaking me gently.  
  
"No 's not," I mumbled into my pillow. "Go 'way. You're worse 'n the damn bug."  
  
"How can you sleep this long? I woke up three hours ago. We need to get going. I have to get back to the castle in two weeks, and I have direct orders to show you the kingdom first, so we really don't have much time to waste."  
  
"Whoopie-friggin'-doo," I replied grumpily. "If there ain't coffee, I ain't moving from this spot."  
  
"The Kokiri are children. Children don't have coffee."  
  
"Then leave me alone," I yawned, pulling the blankets over my head. "Coffee is the only thing that has the power to get me out of bed, you should know that by now."  
  
"Millerna, get out of bed, or I'll be forced to resort to desperate measures."  
  
"Bite me," I said, treating him to a very unladylike hand signal. Within seconds he'd grabbed me and started tickling me.  
  
"UNFAIR BATTLE TACTIC!" I shrieked, giggling uncontrollably as I tried to escape him. No such luck. I decided on the only other course of action: I tickled him back. Any other guy I would probably have punched, but he was...special, somehow. I couldn't explain it, really, but Link made me feel...well, not normal.  
  
I'm not sure how, but somewhere along the line our ferocious battle caused us to fall off the bed (it was about a foot off the floor, so nobody was hurt). I landed on top of him. When I was lying there, gazing into his beautiful blue eyes and feeling his warmth beneath me, it was like the world stopped turning. I was vaguely aware of our faces coming closer together. I could feel his breath on my lips. A little closer and-  
  
"IT'S TIME TO LEAVE, YOU KNOW!" The shrill voice from outside took me from way up in the heavens and brought me crashing back to reality, landing me very hard on my figurative ass when I got there.  
  
"Uh, yeah," Link stammered, blushing. "She's, uh, right. We'd better get going."  
  
"Okay," I said, reluctantly climbing to my feet, and feeling my own cheeks burn. "Um, I should get dressed."  
***  
For probably the first time in my life, I was absolutely silent for more than an hour. Okay, I'm exaggerating, but come on. Link had almost kissed me! At least, I thought he had... Maybe I'd been imagining it?  
  
I shot a glance at him. He was so gorgeous... And with his profile silhouetted against the orange-and-red sunset he looked...well, like the hero he was. Could a man like that really have liked me enough to kiss me? Nobody'd ever kissed me before... Amazing, as perverted as my thoughts about him got sometimes, the mere thought of him kissing me got me so flustered. I don't explain myself.  
  
God, what if he really would have, though? And Navi ruined it! That damn little winged bitch! Did she have to barge into everything?! Okay, so she didn't like me - it was even fair to say she hated me - but WHY, OH WHY DID SHE HAVE TO BE SUCH A PAIN IN THE ASS?! I would really like to know what kills fairies. Whatever it was, I could've used some. That bug was now officially on my "People To Kill" list. She wasn't technically a person, but I didn't feel like making a "Fairies To Kill" list just for her.  
  
Needless to say, I was not paying much attention to my surroundings at the moment. So I didn't see the big log in front of me until I tripped over it. I would have done a face-fault into the ground if it hadn't been for the very person I'd been so distracted by catching me in his arms just as I lost my balance.  
  
"Are you okay?" he asked, looking incredibly concerned. Gee, I wonder why - not only was I not paying attention to anything around me, but I had made not one sarcastic or rude remark the whole time.  
  
"Uh, yeah," I replied, steadying myself and aiming an angry kick at the log. "Why wouldn't I be?"  
  
"Well, you just... seem a little out of it today," he said. Boy, was that the understatement of the year.  
  
"Yeah, lack of coffee," I joked in all lameness. I could have smacked myself for making such a stupid wisecrack, but then Link would have thought I was insane in addition to being spacey. That wouldn't work out too well for me, so I refrained from physically striking myself, and instead launched a few mental frying pans at my head. Great, now I'd have an imaginary migraine all day.  
  
"You're sure you're okay?" he asked again.  
  
"I swear, I'm fine," I said. "So, where are we going?" He smiled, apparently convinced that I wasn't insane or high. Finally.  
  
"It's a surprise," he informed, flashing the ever-so-adorable grin that meant he would tell me absolutely nothing. I shook my head.  
  
"You're such a boy," I accused. Actually, I didn't mind walking through the forest with him, it was just a little irritating not knowing where we were headed. Ah, well, at least Navi was nowhere in the vacinity. That was always a plus. Little blue freak... "How much longer?" I asked.  
  
"We're almost there," he said, leading me through yet another dark tunnel in the forest. Well, they certainly called this place the Lost Woods for a reason; It was like a giant maze. Luckily, my pretty companion seemed to know his way around. And anyway, if we DID end up getting lost, the scenery kind of set the mood for...things. Ah, I treasure my dirty thoughts. They give me happiness.  
  
"Millerna? Why are you blushing?"  
  
"Um, no reason," I replied frantically. Well, sometimes my dirty thoughts give me happiness. Other times, they just get me in trouble. Damn you, hormones. Oh well, at least I wasn't having my period anymore, that was an upside of sorts.  
  
"No reason?" he replied skeptically. "Millerna, I like you a lot, but you are weird."  
  
"Well, duh," I shot back. 'Wait, he likes me a lot?' I thought. 'Does he mean that in a "just friends" way, or in an "I-love-you" way? ARGH! SO MANY FUCKING QUESTIONS!' I yelled inside my head, executing a particularly nasty side kick on the nearest sapling. Link sort of stared at me.  
  
"WHAT?!" I demanded, pointing at the poor, bent tree. "IT WAS MOCKING ME!" Then he did something completely unexpected. He smiled and laughed. "WHAT IS SO FUNNY?!"  
  
"You're cute when you're mad, you know that?" Okay, now my face was about as red as was humanly possible. Cute? He thought I was cute? Did that mean he liked me - like, in a romantic kind of way? I was compelled to jump up and down and randomly hug things, but I decided against it. Hugging trees looks really, really weird. 


	23. The Forest Temple

Millerna: Bitch.  
  
HealerAriel: *innocent look* What did I do?  
  
Millerna: Don't play dumb with me! Just as we were getting to the good part, you let that fairy come in and RUIN IT!  
  
HealerAriel: Oh, come on, Millerna. You know I had to do that. If I let you guys get intimate too quick, you'll look like a slut, and there will be no anticipation to build up for the audience.  
  
Millerna: I DON'T CARE! THE SEXUAL TENSION IS KILLING ME! *pulls hair* I WANNA DO IT! I WANNA DO IT! I WANNA DO IT!  
  
HealerAriel: You will do it when I think it's time.  
  
Millerna: Okay, who here besides me thinks it's a little screwed up that Erin controls MY sex life?  
  
*crickets chirp, and Penelope the nymph rolls her eyes and pops her chewing gum loudly*  
  
Penelope: Freaks. Oh my God! My nail polish is CHIPPING! *scurries off to do her freaking nails, completely abandoning her duties as Starbucks personell*  
  
HealerAriel and Millerna: -_-;  
  
Millerna: You hire some strange people.  
  
HealerAriel: I didn't hire her. She came with the underwater lair. I think the Atlanteans wanted to get rid of her.  
  
Millerna: Gee, can't see why.  
  
.  
.  
  
"I'm dead serious, where are we going?" I demanded for about the eighth time. At first the walk through the forest was kind of cool, but now it was getting dark, and I was feeling the symptoms of caffeine withdrawal. Besides that, we'd been walking since morning (well, as "morning" as one PM could be, since it had taken Link that long to actually get me out of bed), and I was getting tired.  
  
"And I'm dead serious that you will find out when we get there," he answered for about the eighth time. I scowled at him.  
  
"Don't make me hurt you, Pretty Boy," I warned. An empty threat - I liked him too much to hurt him. Badly. "Now tell me where we're going!"  
  
"You're acting like a little kid, Millerna," he informed.  
  
"Am not," I pouted. He laughed at me, and led me through the last passage in the gigantic maze of hedges we'd entered fifteen minutes earlier, and up a series of stone steps. This was followed by a grassy landing and, lo and behold, more stone steps. "Steps must die," I grumbled to myself. "Steps are evil."  
  
I continued my tirade about steps until we reached the top. We were now in a big meadow. It would have looked perfectly normal but for a small stone platform in the center with a weird symbol on it, and what looked like the ruins of an ancient staircase, which was now broken off at the top and covered in vines. All in all, it was actually very pretty.  
  
"Not that this place isn't cute," I stated, "but was it really worth the long walk?"  
  
"Well, actually," Link began, pulling out a little flute-ish thing (A/N- yes, I realize he gave the ocarina back to Zelda at the end of the game, we are assuming that this is a different one, and that they all have cool powers. Work with me here). I recognized that. I'd seen him use it to call Epona. "I COULD have just played a little tune and warped us here..."  
  
"You mean to tell me that you made me hike for hours - without my morning coffee, I might add - when we could have been here in seconds?"  
  
"Yeah," he replied. I smacked him upside the head. "OW!"  
  
"Moron."  
  
"Hey, I don't even know if it works with two people, I've never tried before!"  
  
"Well, what's the worst that could have happened? It warps only you, and I sleep until you get back! That would have been a lovely scenario!"  
  
"Why?"  
  
"Okay, what part of the word 'sleep' do you not understand?" He rolled his eyes at this comment and chose not to respond. "Anyway," I continued, "what's the significance of this place?"  
  
"This place is called the Sacred Forest Meadow."  
  
"Yay," I replied sarcastically. He shot me a look. "It's out of my system now. Please continue."  
  
"Thank you. Anyway, the wrecked staircase up there is the entrance to the Forest Temple. I thought you'd like to look around inside."  
  
"This place was part of the 'saving the world' gig, huh?"  
  
"Of course. I could go into the details, but it's too weird."  
  
"That works for me. So, are there a lot of temples here in Zelda- land?" I asked.  
  
"Are you kidding? I swear, sometimes it seems like this place has more temples than people."  
  
"Do I get to explore all of them?" I asked hopefully. I love temples. Actually, I basically love ancient buildings of any kind.  
  
"No. There are a couple of them that I will not take you to."  
  
"Why not?"  
  
"Some of them are too dangerous. And I'm not saying that you're weak," he assured when I'd opened my mouth to comment. "There are just some places you shouldn't go if you can avoid them. And I'll be damned if I'm going to let you get burned alive in the Fire Temple or something." I blinked a few times. Was it just me, or did that sound like honest-to-God affection there? Well in that case, there was only one thing I could do.  
  
"Aww, you DO love me!" I teased, clasping my hands over my heart. He blushed.  
  
"Oh, shut up," he mumbled. He was so cute when he was like that! I just wanted to kiss him! I really, really, really wanted to kiss him... Okay, I had to get my mind onto another subject.  
  
"Um, how are we going to get up there?" I questioned, pointing to the remains of the staircase. There was no way in hell that we could climb onto that thing. Link looked pretty pleased that we were on a different conversational topic, as well. Ah, I'd embarrassed the boy enough for one day.  
  
"You're not the only one who's armed to the teeth," he commented, producing a freaky little device.  
  
"A grappling hook?" I asked. He smiled, now looking pleased just to find a girl who understood weapons.  
  
"It's called a longshot. But, yeah, it's basically the same thing as a grappling hook. Only you really don't have to have any skill whatsoever to use it properly."  
  
"No fair, I want one," I whined.  
  
"You and sharp, pointy things," he sighed, shaking his head.  
  
"See, you make jokes, but sharp things and explosives are my life," I said seriously as my pointy-eared buddy took aim at a branch above the former staircase. Then he stopped.  
  
"Okay, how exactly are we gonna pull this off?" he asked himself, apparently acting out a few different scenarios in his head. "Ah, this thing should still work with both of our weight."  
  
"And you thought it wouldn't?"  
  
"Well, like with the ocarina, I've never tried it with two people before."  
  
"So nice to be a guinnea pig for these things," I muttered, visualizing the little chain snapping and me falling down and breaking my ass.  
  
"Stop complaining, and just hold onto me," he directed. I complied and wrapped my arms around his waist. 'Ooh, this is kinda nice,' I thought. 'Check out these muscles! Of course, it'd be better if he were naked, but this will do for now.'  
.  
  
***  
  
.  
  
.  
  
One longshot ride later (and boy, was that nerve racking), we entered another meadow, with two huge trees, one on either side, and straight in front of us what I guessed was the entrance to the temple. You know, big stone thing with a door that has vines and moss all over it? Yeah, one of those.  
  
"Haha! Time for me to explore!" I cried gleefully, practically skipping to the door.  
  
"Millerna-!" Link started.  
  
"What?"  
  
"That's weird..." he said, looking around. In doing so, he caught the look I was giving him. "It's nothing," he assured. "It's just that... well, usually there's a pair of Wolfos that guard the temple. And I don't see them."  
  
"Yeah, whatever. Just come on!" I replied. Who cared about creepy Hyrulian thingies? I wanted to see the damn temple! "So, are those things you were looking for something like wolves?" I asked, letting myself into the temple. "The name sounds similar."  
  
"I guess so," he answered, finally giving up his search and following me into the temple. "What are wolves like?"  
  
"Sort of like dogs, but bigger and wild. You don't see one unless you're really lucky, because they're afraid of people most of the time," I explained.  
  
"Well, Wolfos are kind of like that," he agreed. "Except they're... nastier. You don't see a Wolfos unless you're incredibly UNlucky, because very few people are stupid enough to go to places where they live, and they don't come out unless they're hungry."  
  
"That sucks," I stated. "I like normal wolfies. They're cute."  
  
"Yeah, you've got the cute animals where you come from, we've got the mutated ones that try to eat you here," he grumbled. "That's unfair, Millerna."  
  
"Life's a bitch, Pretty Boy," I grinned, wrapping an arm around his shoulders. His very, very muscular shoulders. Damn, that boy was cut! I was probably drooling, but I really didn't care. We came into a room with four gold torches in the center, each one with a differently colored flame burning on top: green, red, blue, and purple. "Oooh! Pretty!" I ran toward the torches and examined each of them. Link was laughing at me.  
  
"If I'd known this was all it would take to make you happy..." he said, shaking his head, that ultimately adorable smile on his face.  
  
"What do you mean?" I asked.  
  
"Your eyes just lit up when you came in here."  
  
"I didn't know you spent your time gazing into my eyes," I replied slyly. That was the brightest I'd ever seen Link blush.  
  
"I don't!" he insisted. "I just happened to notice, that's all. It's not like all I ever do is stare at you." That last part was mumbled as he stared down at the floor, by the way.  
  
I finished my inspection of the torches, and looked around. Lots of doors in this place.  
  
"Can we go in there?" I asked excitedly, pointing to the door I finally decided upon.  
  
"There's just a courtyard out there-"  
  
"Cool!" I grabbed his hand and pretty much dragged him along with me. I can't help it, I'm like a little kid with weapons and ancient temples. I flung the door open and stepped out into the courtyard. It was basically another huge meadow, with a stone bridge going over a blue-green creek, some various stone ruins, and the entire courtyard was surrounded by very high stone walls with vines and ivy all over them, naturally. "Even prettier than the cool fire," I said, staring at my surroundings in awe.  
  
"Millerna? Can I have my hand back?" Link asked. Oh yeah. I was still holding onto him. I let him go, and saw him shaking his hand violently out of the corner of my eye. "I now have no blood circulation in my hand," he said simply. "Thanks, Millerna."  
  
"No problem," I replied somewhat absently, still checking out the pretty temple courtyard. So much cool stuff to play with! I ran over, hopped onto the railing of the bridge, and began to walk the length of it. "What are you doing?" I demanded, as he started to walk beside me on the bridge itself.  
  
"Making sure you don't fall," he answered, as though this were the most obvious thing in the world. I laughed.  
  
"Ha! Unlike some girls, O Hero of Time, *I* do not need a big strong man like you to make sure I don't get hurt. Besides, I happen to have EXCELLENT balance."  
  
"Be that as it may, it couldn't hurt to be careful."  
  
"Why?"  
  
"A man can never be too cautious when he has a beautiful girl to look out for," he replied. For the first time in my long history of balancing on narrow surfaces, I tripped over my own feet. And Link caught me in his arms. He grinned. "I rest my case," he said. I narrowed my eyes at him.  
  
"You were distracting me," I hissed.  
  
"Possibly, but at least I'm true to my word. I caught you, and you didn't get hurt."  
  
"Yeah, well you don't speak for my pride," I growled as he set me on my feet. "It'll take years to live this one down."  
  
"Especially after that comment about your excellent balance," he reminded, leaning against the railing.  
  
"I DO have excellent balance," I insisted hotly, hardly noticing as he slipped an arm around my waist. "It was just temporarily AWOL at the time." He smiled.  
  
"You're still cute when you're mad," he said softly as he tilted my face upward. For the second time that day our lips inched closer. My heart was pounding. And then-  
  
*CRASH*  
  
The rail Link had been leaning on broke, and we both fell into very cold water. I gave him a death glare once we'd surfaced.  
  
"That was graceful. I mean, how brilliant do you have to be to f-f- figure out that you shouldn't put too much w-weight on really old stuff?" I demanded, shivering.  
  
"It was as m-much your fault as m-mine," he informed. "Damn, it's c- cold!"  
  
"You th-think so?" I mocked. "Aren't we the g-genius."  
  
"Oh, stop whining," he groaned as he climbed out onto the grass, then proceeded to help me out.  
  
"I have every right to whine," I informed, laying back on the grass. "And I have every intention of staying right in this spot until my clothes dry."  
  
"Works for me," he replied, laying down next to me. It was a cloudy day, but the air was warm and not at all humid, so our clothes would probably dry quickly enough. I inhaled deeply.  
  
"What's that smell?"  
  
"Honeysuckle. It's all over the place."  
  
"I knew I recognized it from somewhere," I said. "My aunt has lots of honeysuckle bushes at her house. She's the medicine woman in her village, so she really just has a lot of plants. It's so cool, she has this stone cottage right in the middle of all her gardens. Then there's this sort of cross between an arbor and a gazebo on the hill where you can see the sunset over the ocean."  
  
"You love it there," he stated. I nodded.  
  
"It's the only place that's ever really felt like home. I can't explain it, but when I would go there as a little girl I always felt so safe and peaceful. I never felt like that with my parents, and I definitely never felt like that among Carlos and his flunkies. Well, unless I was with- " I stopped.  
  
"With who?" he asked. I sighed.  
  
"With my friend, Ayden. He was the only person who made life there bearable. And he also happens to be the one who taught me to fight, in case you were wondering."  
  
"I was wondering about that, yeah," he agreed, giving me that charming smile. "How old is he?"  
  
"Why do you want to know?"  
  
"Well, I finally know who that nameless friend you kept talking about is, and I want to know more about him," he explained rationally. "So, how old is he?" I did some math in my head.  
  
"He'd be about your age, I guess. Probably a little older."  
  
"Would I like him?"  
  
"Maybe."  
  
"When do I get to meet him?"  
  
"Never."  
  
"Never?" Link repeated. "Why not?" I got to my feet and started walking back inside the temple.  
  
"Let's go now," I said. "You have to get back to the castle soon, right? So let's get going." He followed after me.  
  
"Millerna, you are deliberately avoiding the question."  
  
"Really? What could have possibly given you that idea?" I replied sarcastically. He caught up to me, grabbed my hand, and turned me to face him.  
  
"Millerna," he said gently, touching my face, "if something's bothering you, you can tell me."  
  
"You wouldn't understand."  
  
"But I'll listen. And you'll feel better once you talk about it, I promise."  
  
"No I won't, I'll feel worse. And I'll probably start crying, or something equally pathetic."  
  
"Then I'll hold you while you cry," he said. That struck a chord in my heart, and right then I came to a very important conclusion: I would never, ever deserve him. He was too good, too kind for someone like me. And I was getting my hopes up. I took in a somewhat shakey breath.  
  
"Please, let's go." I was almost begging by that point. And he finally gave up.  
  
"Okay."  
*  
(A/N- I know, the ending of this chapter's kind of sad, but there was no other way to end it. It'll get happier later, at least this is a long chapter.) 


	24. Danger at the Temple

(A/N- Hello everyone! I just got Windwaker - yeah, the one with the goofy graphics. But, once you get used to the graphics and you start to notice the facial expressions and stuff, it's probably the most adorable Zelda game there is. And Link's just the cutest little thing ever! ^_^ You actually get to see him smile, and he's soooo precious! You just wanna hug him! Oh, and you can pick up weapons your enemies drop and use them to whack at stuff, which is fun, especially when you take out some of those big dudes with the huge-ass Kwandos. And best of all , the Princess of Hyrule hasn't reared her head yet, and I'm in the second.... well, I GUESS you could call it a dungeon (Okay, so Zelda annoys me, big deal!). But, even with all the cuteness considered, it will never replace Ocarina of Time's place in my heart. I can't help it, I love OoT dearly, and always will. Windwaker's really cool though, once you get used to the oddly-drawn cartoon look of it, and it is unrivalled in sheer kawaii-ness. Okay, I'm done with my lecture on cute things.)  
What was up with that girl? All I'd done was ask about her friend, I hadn't known it would upset her so much. I hated seeing her upset.  
  
It occured to me once or twice as I followed her on the way out of the temple that maybe I should apologize for...whatever it was that I had done...but then, that might have made her even more unhappy. I settled for the simple conclusion that I would never understand women of any age, and resolved not to try to. I focused instead on what I could do to make her feel better. What did women like? Well, there were things like flowers and jewelry for most of them, but Millerna didn't really seem like the kind of girl to be interested in those sort of things. She'd probably value a weapon over roses any day, but the thought of giving her something sharp and/or spontaneously combustible made me more than a little nervous - for good reason. Besides, where would she put another addition to her vast arsenal? It blew me away that she could hide the weapons she had already. It kind of impressed me, too, even though I'd never tell her that.  
  
I cursed my shyness. Why couldn't I just tell her...? How the hell did I get to be thought of as such a big hero when I was such a big coward around girls? How did that make any sense at all?  
  
"Goddesses, I'm a loser," I grumbled under my breath as we finally went back out through the entrance of the temple. Millerna stopped suddenly.  
  
"Um, question," she said, a hint of nervousness in her voice. "Are those guys our friends?" And sure enough, she was pointing at the two very large Wolfos who had just reentered the meadow.  
***  
  
(A/N- This will be violent, so if you don't like a lot of blood, skip to the next chapter.)  
"Damn!" he hissed, unsheathing the sword he always wore. Okay, so those puppies were NOT our friends. Although such would have been apparent immediately upon noticing that the wolfies were eyeing us like we were juicy steaks.  
  
"Alrighty," I said. "You take the one on the left, and I'll-"  
  
"You'll stay back and let me protect you," he informed, stepping in front of me. Okay, chivalry good; treating me like a china doll, bad.  
  
"There is no way I am going to stand back and let you do all the work!" I yelled. He ignored me and went to fight the monsters. But it didn't look good, each of them was so much bigger than him, and they were teaming up. "To hell with this!" I snapped, untying the whipchain around my waist. I may have been kind of small, but I was damn good with my whip chain. I could definitely take at least one of them!  
  
By the time I got down to where they were, adrenaline was already pumping through my blood. Maybe Ayden had been right about me being crazy, but at this moment, it was a good thing.  
  
"HEY, MUTT!" I yelled at the top of my lungs. The smaller monster turned his head in my direction. Glowing yellow-green eyes fixed on the new prey: me. He licked his big, sharp teeth and galloped toward me. *Okay, Millerna, not your brightest idea ever,* I decided, spinning my whip chain and backing away slowly. As he began to close in on me, I shot out the chain, sending the metal dart at the end sailing straight into one of those creepy eyes. He howled in agony as blood gushed from where his right eye used to be. I'd feel sorry for him later, but right now my main goal was to kill his ass.  
  
As he clawed wildly at the ruined eye, I took the opportunity to land a flying sidekick to his head, then backed away a bit. He stumbled around, dazed from the blow to the head and the rapid blood loss. I felt a pang of sympathy for some unknown reason, so I did the only humane thing I could at that point. I pulled out a dagger, walked over to where he had now fallen, and cut his throat in one quick motion.  
  
"Sorry," I said, for no real reason, as a new sound of pain cut through the air. I whipped around. The larger monster was minus an arm and bleeding profusely from many blows from the sword, but had managed to slash his wicked claws right across Link's chest. For the first time, I felt true rage. That furry bastard had to die. Before I knew what I was doing, I jumped on his back, drove my dagger straight into his skull, and twisted it for good measure. It took three seconds for him to die after I'd yanked my dagger back out.  
  
"I told you....to stay....back," Link scolded me. He didn't look too good. His face had gone white and blood poured from the gashes in his chest, even through his valiant attempt to hide the injury with his free hand.  
  
"That THING almost killed you, and you're yelling at me for helping?"  
  
"You're exaggerating," he said. "I'm fine. I just...need...to sit down." The sword dropped from his hand and landed on the grass that was quickly being stained red.  
  
"Let me see," I said, gesturing to the source of the blood. He shook his head weakly.  
  
"I...told you. I'm fine. It's just...a scratch."  
  
"Would you stop being a typical male and let me try to help you!" I demanded. He complied and sat down.  
  
"I'm tired," he said, his words becoming slightly slurred. He looked like he was fighting to keep his eyes open. God, he was scaring me.  
  
"That's because you're bleeding to death," I croaked, remembering vividly how Ayden had died as I dug around in my medicine bag for something - anything - to stop the bleeding. I should have brought more raeyuka leaves with me, what I had wouldn't be enough! (A/N- yes, I am making up the names of herbs, so shut up and work with me.) I hissed various obscenities under my breath as I extracted the small pouch of leaves and began crumbling them onto his wounds. He was lying down by now.  
  
"Don't you fucking die on me, Forest Boy," I ordered, trying in vain to fight back the hot tears forming in my eyes. The raeyuka leaves were slowing the bleeding, but only a little.  
  
"Don' cry," he said quietly. "I'll be okay. Jus' lemme sleep for a while..."  
  
"No, NO! Don't you dare close your eyes! You hear me? Dammit, stay awake!" I yelled at him as he closed his eyes. "Shit, don't do this to me! WAKE UP!"  
(A/N- Dontcha hate me?) 


	25. So, Does This Mean You Love Me?

He blinked his eyes groggily. A few red and gold beams of light were coming in through the window next to the bed. *Wow,* Link thought. *That was the freakiest nightmare yet.* He tried to sit up, but a sharp pain stopped him.  
  
"You shouldn't try to get up so soon, you know."  
  
"Oh. Hi, Saria," he said. "What are you doing here? You're usually in the forest somewhere." Saria tucked a stray strand of green hair behind her ear and sat cross-legged on the foot of the bed.  
  
"She told me to watch you and make sure you were okay," she explained.  
  
"Who did? Millerna?"  
  
"Yeah. She was really upset when you got hurt by that Wolfos."  
  
"I wouldn't have gotten hurt if I hadn't been paying so much attention as to whether or not she was okay," he informed. Saria frowned.  
  
"I'd be more grateful if I were you. You would have died if it weren't for her. She's been taking care of you."  
  
"Oh, come on, Saria, you deserve some of the credit," Millerna said as she entered the house. "You found the herbs I needed."  
  
"Yeah, but you knew how to use them, and I didn't," Saria reminded. Link grinned.  
  
"That's kind of sad, considering the whole Sage thing, Saria," he teased. Saria pouted. Millerna rolled her eyes.  
  
"Well enough to be mean, I see," she said, gently placing a hand on his forehead. "At least you're not cold as death anymore."  
  
"You scared us all really bad," Saria added. "You just about bled to death. It's a good thing raeyuka leaves work fast."  
  
"Um...never heard of them."  
  
"They look like this," Millerna informed, holding up a green, purple, and gold leaf with lacy edges. "They stop bleeding almost instantly, if you have enough."  
  
"Okay, I have to get back to the temple," Saria said quickly. "Bye!"  
  
"Why's she in such a hurry?" Link asked, watching his friend scurry out of the house. Millerna studied her hands as a pale pink blush lit her cheeks. "And what's that look for?"  
  
"I...believe Saria has her own idea of exactly what our relationship is," she said.  
  
"And, exactly what is her idea of it?"  
  
"Take a wild guess, and you'll probably be right."  
  
"...Oh, hell. Why does everyone think that?"  
  
"Oh, and I'm supposed to know? Damn, Link, I'm not psychic."  
  
"What did you say?"  
  
"I said, I'm not psychic."  
  
"No. What did you call me?"  
  
"I called you Link, moron, it's your name, isn't it?"  
  
"But you never call me Link," he reminded.  
  
"So?"  
  
"So, does that mean you love me?" he asked, grinning mischievously. Millerna went bright red.  
  
"All that blood loss made you woozy," she insisted. "Anyway, do you want anything to eat or drink?"  
  
"Fine, I'll let you off for the time being," he surrendered, giving her a dissapointed look. "But food would be nice. I feel like I haven't eaten in two days."  
  
"Actually, you haven't eaten in a week and two days."  
  
"WHAT?! I have to get back to the castle!" he yelped, trying to get up.  
  
"Don't you dare, you'll open your wounds!" she said sternly, pushing him back down. "I'm dead serious, those big old gashes in your chest just closed a few days ago, and I'll be damned if I'm letting you go anywhere until I'm absolutely certain that they won't open again! Trust me, Zelda will understand if she's a decent person. Just relax, and I'll get you something to eat, okay? Stay in that bed."  
  
***  
  
It was good to see him back to normal. Well, considering what the circumstances had been, it was good to just see him alive. It made me feel cold inside to know that I'd almost lost him. Losing my best friend had broken my heart, but to lose Link... Oh shit, I was getting all teary-eyed again. Damn feminine emotions...  
  
I wiped my eyes violently as I went outside to the big old pot the forest kids had set up (they had this habit of always setting that pot outside to cook in). I was surrounded almost instantaneously by people half my height.  
  
"Miss Millerna, is Link okay?" Jacob asked anxiously.  
  
"Can we see him?" a little girl named Kalli added, clasping her hands and staring up at me with big blue eyes.  
  
"He's fine," I assured. Cue collective sigh of relief from all forest- dwellers. "He's just going to need to rest for a while."  
  
"Don't you have any other magic plants that'll make him get better faster?" Marianne begged. I thought about this for a minute.  
  
"As a matter of fact," I began, pulling out my medicine bag again, and removing a green stem with shiny blue flowers sticking out at odd angles, "if you could find me some more of this-"  
  
"'Kay!" Ilana shouted, plucking one of the flowers - for reference, most likely - off the stem and yanking Marianne off into the forest with her. Several of the others followed suit, and pretty soon I had a whole legion off in the Lost Woods to find more kinokiva flowers for me.  
  
"I love these guys," I decided as I ladled some of the soup from the pot into a bowl and made my reentry to Link's little house. He looked at me.  
  
"It got quiet all of a sudden," he stated.  
  
"And I told you not to strain yourself," I reminded, giving him a look similar to the one Aunt Miranda gave me when I did something she'd expressly told me not to.  
  
"Sitting up in bed is not going to kill me," he said, all but snatching the bowl out of my hands.  
  
"And don't eat so fast, it's not healthy," I scolded, sitting down on the foot of the bed.  
  
"What are you, my mother?" he mumbled through a mouthful of food.  
  
"Well, someone has to take care of you, and no one else seems to be offering to take the job."  
  
"That's sweet, Millerna, I didn't know you cared so much."  
  
"Oh, shut up and eat your damn food," I snapped, blushing. He continued to wolf down the contents of the bowl. I shook my head. He was such a typical guy sometimes.  
  
"So, where'd they all go?" he asked after he'd finished.  
  
"The Kokiri? Out into the forest to fetch me some herbs to make you better, so that you can get to the damn castle."  
  
"Will they work fast?"  
  
"You'll be fine by tomorrow morning if I've got enough."  
  
"In that case, may I pose a question? Why didn't you give them to me earlier?"  
  
"Because they happen to be very painful when they are taking affect, and if I'd used them on you while you were asleep, you might have woken up and jerked around, thus reopening your wounds and defeating the purpose. That would be bad."  
  
"Yeah, and putting me through excrutiating pain while I'm awake is good," he grumbled.  
  
"It's not my fault men can't handle pain," I informed, smirking.  
  
"We'll see about that." 


	26. Heading Back to the Castle

"Umm...how exactly are those used?" Link asked nervously. I knew he hadn't meant to sound nervous, but, like I said, men can't handle pain. And I think watching me crush the kinokiva plants - which he KNEW would hurt like hell when they were used - was making him very anxious.  
  
"You smash them, mix them with hot water, and drink them," I explained, still grinding the plants into a very pretty, shimmery, blue- green paste.  
  
"Uh huh," he said. "And, do they taste as bad as your headache medicine?" I laughed.  
  
"They taste kind of like blood." Link shuddered.  
  
"Would it hurt you to find some magic cures that taste GOOD?" he demanded.  
  
"The cure for menstrual cramps tastes like strawberries," I offered, giggling.  
  
"I hate you."  
  
"Oh, come on, Link. It's medicine, it's not supposed to be good."  
  
"Well, it should be," he pouted. Then he grinned at me. "That makes two times you've used my name. You sure there isn't just a little bit of affection for me deep down in that heart of stone?" I was very glad I had my back to him at the time, because I'm sure I was blushing like hell.  
  
"If I didn't know any better, I'd think you were flirting with me," I shot back.  
  
"I never said I wasn't." This situation was quickly becoming uncomfortable. I mixed some hot water into the kinokiva paste, which turned red and fizzed as soon as the liquid hit it. "That sound is none too comforting," Link informed. I gave him a wicked smile. "Neither is that look," he added. "You never fail to strike fear into the hearts of men, Millerna."  
  
"I'm kind of proud of that," I said, nodding, as I poured my concoction into a cup. I handed it to him. He studied it warily.  
  
"You're sure this'll be worth it?" he asked, sniffing the liquid. He coughed and turned his face away from it.  
  
"It doesn't taste AS bad as it smells," I assured. "Now drink it before it cools. It'll be useless if you don't down it when it's hot."  
  
"So, it'll heal me painfully AND burn my tongue and throat," he grumbled. "I'm beginning to hate it when you make me better, Millerna." Nevertheless, he swallowed the whole thing at once. Then he looked at me. "You said it would be painful."  
  
"It will be," I assured. A moment later I saw him grit his teeth. "It just takes a second to work."  
  
"I...noticed," he hissed, starting to breathe hard. I sat down beside him and put my arms around him.  
  
"I guess you're tougher than I gave you credit for," I said.  
  
"How...so?" he managed, through the searing pain I knew was shooting throughout his body.  
  
"Whenever I got hurt and my aunt gave me kinokiva potion to make me better, I cried," I confessed, hanging my head.  
  
"There's no...shame...in...letting people...know how you feel."  
  
"Yes there is."  
  
"You are...messed up," he informed helpfully. I laughed.  
  
"Yeah, maybe I am. Not exactly the picture of mental health, am I?" He shook his head, then blinked a few times.  
  
"Wow. It doesn't hurt anymore."  
  
"Works quick, doesn't it?"  
  
"Yeah." He turned left and right, probably testing to see if the cuts were still going to be painful. "That's cool. Can we leave now?" I gave him a look.  
  
"You are very dedicated to your job, aren't you?" I asked incredulously. He gave me this cute smile and shrugged.  
  
"It's what I do best," he admitted. "It kind of sucks, but it's my sole purpose in life."  
  
"Well, if you want my opinion, you need to find a new one," I said. "A new purpose in life, I mean. Get up, let me take your bandages off," I commanded. He did so.  
  
"So, what's your purpose in life, Millerna?" he asked as I began to undo the wrappings.  
  
"Currently, it's to be your personal nurse," I teased. He rolled his eyes.  
  
"Why did I see THAT one coming?" he asked rhetorically. "But, seriously, what do you think your purpose is?"  
  
"At one point someone told me it was my destiny to fall in love, get married, and have kids," I responded. Well, that's what AMARA said my purpose was. Link laughed.  
  
"You?"  
  
"Yeah, go figure. I more or less told her she was insane after she handed out that little piece of wisdom." I pulled away the last piece of cloth and inspected him. I ran my fingers over the faint scars - the only evidence left that he'd been hurt.  
  
"You're good at what you do," he remarked. I shook my head.  
  
"If Aunt Miranda had treated you, you would have been better in half this time and there would be no scars. Compared to her, I'm pretty bad at taking care of people."  
  
"Well, compared to everyone I know," he said, giving me a warm smile, "you're brilliant. So stop putting yourself down." He kissed my cheek. Why did I feel like fainting whenever he did that?  
  
"Um, okay," I said stupidly, feeling my face heat up. God, he made me such a ditz! His smile brightened.  
  
"I'm gonna go take a bath," he said, tilting his head in the direction of the forest. I just nodded.  
  
***  
  
"You're sure we have to go now?" I asked, taking a long, last look around the forest before following him out to the horses. I'd grown pretty attached to the Kokiri, and to be honest, I wasn't too excited about going back to the dark, gloomy, foul-smelling castle with bad food and worse coffee. Not to mention, the annoying people around every corner.  
  
"Yes," he said. "It takes a few days to get to the castle."  
  
"Stupid castle," I muttered. "If only they made decent food..."  
  
"You'd like it?"  
  
"I wouldn't LIKE it, but I'd be able to suffer through it a little better."  
  
"Well, I can't make them cook better, but I can promise that no one will make you wear a corset this time," he offered, swinging himself up onto Epona's back. I followed suit with Ebony.  
  
"You possess such power?"  
  
"Hey, I'm the Hero of Time. They have to listen to me, after I saved their asses from certain doom."  
  
"Well, we aren't getting a little cocky, are we?" I teased. He grinned.  
  
"I speak only the truth." Then he got this mischievous look in his eyes. He pointed to a tree a mile away. "You wanna race?" I gave him my most evil smile, and took off at a flat-out run, leaving him behind me yelling, "You cheated!"  
  
Needless to say, I got to the tree before him, but only by seconds. It was amazing how fast a big, bulky, farm horse like Epona could run when given proper incentive.  
  
"That was unfair," Link informed when he'd caught up to me.  
  
"Unfair, but so fun," I responded, giving him my sweetest smile. "For me, anyway."  
  
"Yeah, I bet." He looked up at the sky, now almost completely dark. "Well, your call: do you want to set up camp somewhere, or keep going?"  
  
"It would probably be better in the long run if we just kept going," I said. "No, 'cause I think our furry friends back in the forest kinda ruined me for camping."  
  
"Understandable. I was expecting you to be a little apprehensive about it, but...well, moreso because of the whole situation that played out last time," he informed, blushing a bit.  
  
"Yeah, we probably shouldn't do that anymore," I said, studying my hands and feeling more than a little guilty for my own actions that night. Stupid hormones, they were the source of all my problems. Didn't help that I was constantly in the company of an insanely gorgeous man with a killer body and a surprisingly sweet personality, either. And then there was the fact that I was becoming oddly prone to seeing him without a shirt on: something very enjoyable, of course, but it was hell trying to contain myself. "That would be a bad thing to get into again," I added as an afterthought. Link nodded.  
  
"Definitely," he agreed, looking like he was hiding some sort of inner guilt, as well. Hell if I knew what HE could possibly be ashamed about, I'd practically molested him. And I probably would have done it again if I'd gotten the chance.  
  
WHY did he have to be so sexy? 


	27. Navi Makes a Reentrance

Good things never last long. They either get lost or interrupted. In my case, my ever-so-cherished alone time with a certain charming Hyrulian hero was that good thing. And the reason it didn't last long? Well, it's a small, annoying reason that buzzes around like a fly.  
  
"FINALLY I caught up to you!" she cried in her shrill little voice as she zipped up to Link. Wow, didn't the buggy look worn out. She was bent over her tiny knees and panting as though she'd just run a thirty-mile race at top speed. Geez, she had wings, how strenuous could THAT be?  
  
"Oh, hi, Navi," Link replied, looking a little confused. "Where were you all this time?" Uh oh. I attempted to shrink down into my saddle.  
  
"I TRIED to come see you after you were hurt!" she insisted, before shooting a death glare right at me. "But unfortunately," she added venomously, "that wasn't possible."  
  
"What happened?" he asked, looking even more puzzled.  
  
"Ask. Her," the little bug growled, pointing at me. Link looked like he was trying to hold back a smile.  
  
"Did you do something mean, Millerna?" he asked, sounding more amused and - to Navi's incredibly obvious dissapproval - flirtatious than he'd probably intended to. I put on my sweet-and-innocent face. Navi sputtered angrily and began to glow with a red aura. I heard Link stifle a laugh.  
  
"That...That...That WOMAN," she spat, "put me into a BOTTLE!"  
  
"That's not true," I retorted. "It was a vial."  
  
"SAME DIFFERENCE!" she roared. You do not want to hear an already shrill voice raised that high, I can tell you that right now. "And THEN she put the bottle-"  
  
"Vial," I corrected.  
  
"-INTO A DRAWER!" she bellowed. "I WAS STUCK INSIDE A BOTTLE IN A DRESSER DRAWER FOR OVER A WEEK!"  
  
"I'm sure it wasn't meant to be taken as a personal offense," Link offered, still looking like he was trying not to laugh at the sight of an angry Navi. This, predictably, pissed her off even more, to the point where I was honestly wondering if she would explode.  
  
"NOT MEANT TO BE TAKEN AS AN OFFENSE?!" she shrieked. "WHAT ELSE COULD IT BE TAKEN AS?!"  
  
***  
  
There's one good thing about Navi, as far as I could tell: time flies when she's in a pissy mood. And, sure enough, she spent the next few days ranting on and on about my personality, manners, and clothing. For such a miniscule being, she certainly had a lot of rage pent up inside her. Of course, it didn't really help that I was constantly testing my "fairies- explode-when-they-get-mad-enough" theory on her, but it wasn't as though the little bitch didn't deserve it. She would never live that "tramp" remark down.  
  
But, thanks to the bug, I found myself entering the castle town again in what seemed like no time at all. And once again, all the little peasants came out of their little homes. But, there was a slight difference.  
  
"I think they remember you, Millerna," Link remarked, smirking. Sure enough, as I turned my head to a group of men in the crowd, they backed away veeeeerrrry slowly, with looks of fright on their faces. I learned long ago that if you can't beat 'em, and you don't wanna join 'em, scare the living shit out of 'em, and all is well. By some odd coincidence, I caught sight of the guy I'd punished last time. As soon as he realized I was looking at him, he did something very strange: he bowed to me.  
  
"Oh, so they respect me now?" I asked quietly.  
  
"You're a pretty girl who can beat the hell out of a grown man. What do you think?"  
  
"I think I may learn to tolerate it here," I replied, grinning evilly. He shook his head.  
  
"One of the many things that makes us different."  
  
"What, my violent nature? If I'm not mistaken, fighting is a pretty big part of your career, Mr. Hero."  
  
"Yeah, but YOU enjoy it."  
  
"You don't?"  
  
"I'm a lover, not a fighter. I just happen to be a little better at the latter."  
  
"You never know until you try," I muttered.  
  
"What was that?"  
  
"Nothing," I replied, starting to blush. "Talking to myself." He looked sceptical, but he let the subject drop as we continued our journey up to the castle. "Does that stupid guard have to lead us again?" I asked.  
  
"That's sort of his job," Link responded. Then he added in a casual tone, "But I know another way in." He was keeping a straight face, but I recognized that gleam in his eyes. He turned to look at me. "Feel like sneaking past a few guards?"  
  
***  
  
"Damn, are these guys blind, or just stupid?" I whispered after we'd gotten past the last two guards, and had started down a dark stone hallway- thing. "We can be so close to them and they don't see us at all!" Link smiled.  
  
"I used to do this all the time when I was a kid," he said, sounding almost giddy. "You know, I don't think they ever did catch me."  
  
"The royal family doesn't train their guards very well," I said, stifling a giggle as we came out into a sunny courtyard (it wasn't as pretty as my courtyard, but it was okay). Link pointed to the window straight in front of us.  
  
"Zelda's throneroom is right inside," he said, looking incredibly pleased with himself.  
  
"You're legendary for a reason."  
  
"Yes I know," he agreed, laughing. "Through the window we go."  
  
"Wouldn't this qualify as breaking and entering?" I asked.  
  
"Yeah."  
  
"Okay. I just wanted to make sure," I replied, stepping through the window into a very dark room. I heard a gasp, and turned to face the source. "Hey there, Princess!" I chirped, my 'I-just-snuck-into-a-heavily- guarded-facility-without-getting-caught-or-beheaded' high having yet to wear off. The busty blonde royal stared at me in surprise from atop a bejeweled purple velvet throne, currently wearing a similarly gold-and- jewel encrusted silk gown in a light pink shade. DIDN'T SHE EVER GET TIRED OF THOSE DAMN PINK CLOTHES!!!??  
  
"How did you get in here?" she demanded. Link poked his pretty head inside, grinned, and waved.  
  
"We were bored and decided to take the scenic route," he explained, climbing into the room.  
  
"You snuck in? Link, that's not very proper and you know it," she scolded. Then she lightened up. "Did you show her the kingdom?" she asked with a nod in my direction. I raised my hand.  
  
"Her name is Millerna," I stated. This went ignored. Well, duh.  
  
"Not all of it," he answered. Zelda put on her puzzled face.  
  
"You had plenty of time."  
  
"We were, uh, unavoidably detained," he admitted. The puzzled look turned into a look of disapproval. Link blushed. "Not like that!" he insisted. "No, there was nothing like that, I just got into a small fight with a Forest Temple inhabitant. And he won, so we couldn't go anywhere for a while." Zelda nodded.  
  
"I see. Well, you both need to get ready for tonight. I suggest that you see her to her room."  
  
"Again, my name is-" Link had pulled me out of the room before I could finish. "MILLERNA! MY NAME IS MILLERNA!" I hollered through the thick door. Link rolled his eyes and guided me down the hallway. "What did she mean about getting ready? What's happening tonight?"  
  
"There's going to be a ball. And we are both going to be in attendance."  
  
"Do I have to?"  
  
"Yes."  
  
"Damn." 


	28. A Dress That Doesn't Suffocate? Like Mag...

And so it was that for the second time in my life, I was sitting in a large, elaborate bedchamber awaiting someone to dress me up in lots of heavy underthings. I now felt empathy for pack animals, really, I did. Ah, well, at least I'd had time to take a bath with actual soap and shampoo, that was always a good thing.  
  
"This is so boring," I muttered, flopping back onto my big, cushy bed, complete with embroidered white silk and lace. I had to admit, if they'd had some fresh air and decent food, the castle might not have been such a sucky place to be. I particularly liked the red silk kimono robe I'd found in the closet (and was currently wearing because it was so damn cool). Yep, if it weren't for the stench and the terrible food, it would have been a pretty nice place. But, this was wishful thinking.  
  
Then, the ever-dreaded knock came. I could either lie down and pretend to be dead, or answer.  
  
"Come in," I called, deciding on the latter as the best course of action. The servant girl from last time came in, holding a large box.  
  
"Good evening, milady," she said, bowing her head. Okay, so legally my status was probably lower than hers, but it's still nice when you get respect from people.  
  
"Uh huh," I replied. "What's the deal with this ball?"  
  
"It's Her Majesty's birthday," she explained quietly.  
  
"Well, happy birthday to Zelda," I said. Once the look of shock disappeared from the girl's face, she handed the box over, and I noticed an envelope on the front addressed to me. Curious, I opened it and read what was inside:  
  
'I thought this would be more your style. And, like I promised, no corset.'  
  
"It's from Sir Link," the girl added helpfully.  
  
"I figured as much," I replied, smiling, as I opened the box. I pulled out a long white dress with gold trim (A/N- think Greecian/Roman goddess), and a gold sash. It was so beautiful! Girlish instincts took over, and I ran to the mirror to hold it up to myself.  
  
"You've forgotten the rest," she informed, holding out stockings (very, very soft ones, at that) and (heel-less!) gold slippers.  
  
"I feel special!" I shouted happily (I had a feeling that my high from sneaking into the castle still hadn't quite worn off yet). She laughed quietly at my antics.  
  
"Shall I help you to dress?" she asked. Too late, I had already discarded my kimono onto the bed and pulled the gown on over my head, and was admiring myself in the mirror. Hey, the draping neckline made it look like I had breasts! I spun around, making the floaty material of the dress fly about.  
  
"Please, milady, this is my job," she said, leading me back to the bed and sitting me down. She began to pull the stockings onto my legs.  
  
"What's your name?" I asked.  
  
"Why does milady want to know my name?"  
  
"Making conversation," I replied. "And you could call me Millerna, no one would strike you dead, you know."  
  
"It isn't proper to address a lady by her first name," she explained firmly. "But, my name is Giselle."  
  
"How old are you, Giselle?"  
  
"Nearly fourteen, milady." I'm sure my jaw dropped. Giselle looked like she was at least my age. EVEN THIRTEEN-YEAR-OLDS HAD BIGGER BOOBS THAN ME!  
  
"Really? So, I guess your parents work here in the castle, too," I said. She shook her head.  
  
"My parents live in Kakariko Village. I came here with my husband, Thomas."  
  
"Husband?!" I cried. "You're just a kid!"  
  
"Our parents arranged the marriage," she explained, as she put on my shoes. "I was betrothed to Thomas on the day I was born. Our parents were close friends, so they decided that it made sense for us to marry."  
  
"How old was he when you were betrothed?"  
  
"I think he was eleven years old." She must have caught the look of utter astonishment I was giving her, because she added quickly, "Oh, he's a wonderful person. We've grown to love each other very much. Our first child was born four months ago." Ah. That explained the huge breasts. My self- confidence returned to its normal level.  
  
"So, um, is it a girl or a boy?" I asked, trying to push all the shock aside. Giselle smiled warmly.  
  
"A daughter. Her name is Noelle."  
  
"That's a pretty name."  
  
"Thank you," she said. She lead me over to the vanity in the corner, sat me on the stool, and began to style my hair up into a complicated weave of tiny braids. "I'd like to have at least four children. How many do you want?"  
  
"I want one son. And I'm naming him Ayden," I said instantly. "Of course, that's if I have children at all." Giselle giggled.  
  
"Well, why wouldn't you have children? You're going to marry Sir Link, aren't you?" she asked. I could see myself blushing furiously in the mirror.  
  
"Why would you think something like that?" I demanded. "We're friends!" 'Yay, Millerna, lie to the girl!' I scolded myself.  
  
"Oh, I'm sorry," she said. "I thought you were lovers. You do look very nice together, though," she added. "You'd have beautiful children." I think I choked on my own tongue right about then.  
  
***  
  
"I admire you," one of the guards said. Link and his acquaintances in the armed force of Hyrule Castle were having one of those little male- bonding periods. Well, the guards were, Link was just bored and had nowhere else to go.  
  
"Why?" Link asked. The guard grinned.  
  
"You found one of the finest looking women I've ever seen to be your traveling companion, that's why," he replied. "I assume you've slept with her, of course."  
  
"If you mean just sleeping in the same bed, then yes."  
  
"'Just'?" another guard chimed in. "What, you slept with her, and there was no sex?"  
  
"Nope, no sex."  
  
"Are you insane?" a third demanded. "How can you sleep with a woman and not fuck her?!" Link shook his head.  
  
"Is that all you care about?"  
  
"Face it, the only thing women are good for is sex and childbearing. They have no other purpose," the first guard explained, as though this were a well-known fact.  
  
"What about companionship?" Link offered. The guards burst out laughing.  
  
"You really are still a boy!" Guard Two snickered. "Companionship, with a woman? And listen to her rattle on about her housework all day? No, thank you!" Now, through all of this, our hero was becoming a little annoyed. But, Guard Three decided to push it a little further.  
  
"Hey," he said, looking pensive. "If you don't want that little minx you're traveling with, can I have a go at her? I mean, once her tits get a little bigger and-" A second later, there was a blade pressed up against his neck.  
  
"Don't you EVER talk about her like that," Link growled. Guard Three looked like he could have fainted.  
  
"No problem," he croaked. "My mistake."  
  
***  
  
I kept admiring myself in the full-length mirror long after Giselle had left. Maybe I'd let Link pick all my formal wear from now on. Conceited as it may sound, I looked absolutely stunning. And as an added bonus, I was about as comfortable as I could possibly be in a dress! There was a second knock on the door.  
  
"Who is it?" I asked. The answer, dripping with sarcasm, came in the form of,  
  
"It's Epona, Millerna, I learned to speak." I couldn't help but laugh as I went to open the door.  
  
"You're spending too much time with me," I informed him. "That sounds like something I would say."  
  
"That is kind of frightening," he agreed. "Do you like the dress?" he added, smiling.  
  
"Of course, I can breathe, and I look beautiful!"  
  
"You're always beautiful," he stated, his cheeks turning pink. "You're beautiful in men's clothes, with uncombed hair." Now I was starting to blush.  
  
"Um...thanks," I said. "You know...everyone seems to think that we're...lovers."  
  
"Yeah, I, uh, noticed that," he replied. He forced a laugh. "Crazy, huh?"  
  
"Definitely. I mean, us? That would be so weird."  
  
"Very weird," he agreed. "So, are you ready to go?" I nodded, and he began to lead me to the ballroom. And I couldn't help but notice that his hand was on my waist. 


	29. Dancing, Gardens, and Good Behavior

(A/N- Yay for me! *huggles the lovely purple belt aquired today* Movin' on up in those Hap Ki Do ranks, I am! My preciousssssssss...... Pretty, pretty purple belt! *Jumps up and down*)  
  
"Too many people," I muttered to Link under my breath as we entered the huge, elaborately decorated ballroom packed with snobby-looking people of all shapes and sizes.  
  
"Deal with it," he responded. "I don't like these things either."  
  
"So why are we both here?" I demanded, in the same hushed tone.  
  
"I'M here because Zelda is a close friend of mine, and I'm obligated to be at every single shindig she throws," he explained. "And YOU are here because I need someone to keep me sane."  
  
"Uh, not the best choice of company, then," I informed, trying to hold back a smile. He looked like he was about to reply, but,  
  
"Ah, good Sir!" The guy who'd spoken looked like your typical rich man. You know, fancy clothes; strange choice in hats, shoes, and facial hair; really constipated way of walking.  
  
"He's a Duke," Link explained before the guy got to us. I nodded.  
  
"Forgive me, Sir Link," the guy said. "But I've heard such stories from the townsfolk, and I had to find out if they were true." Link looked a little apprehensive.  
  
"What kind of stories are they telling you?" he asked warily. Dukey put on this smile that made it perfectly obvious that he was a Grade-A douchebag. But, that's just my woman's intuition.  
  
"Why, stories that you're traveling with a foreign beauty." Then he looked at me. "I assume this is she of whom they speak."  
  
"This is she," I agreed, painfully forcing a smile. I guess I looked sincere, because he smiled back.  
  
"Ah, but the rumors of your beauty hardly do you justice, milady!" Oh yeah. Douchebag alert.  
  
"That's good," I replied, through teeth still gritted in my false smile.  
  
"Could I bother you for a dance, milady?" he asked. Link's grip on me tightened considerably.  
  
"No thank you," I answered, laying the sugary-sweetness on as thick as humanly possible. "I'm very tired from the ride here."  
  
"I understand. Too much time outdoors can do that to a lady," he informed. I nodded, and he finally left.  
  
"That was surprisingly masterful of you," Link awarded. "You actually pretended to be polite."  
  
"Well, I wasn't about to risk being rude, considering that death-grip you had on me," I remarked. "Or, was that because you didn't like the idea of any other male laying a finger on me?" He blushed. I smirked. "Well, aren't we becoming protective, 'Sir Link'. You never told me you were a knight."  
  
"Why does it matter?"  
  
"Oh, just all that romantiscism about knights," I explained. "You know, every girl secretly dreams that one day she'll find her knight-in- shining-armor, who'll ride her off into the sunset." He gave me an interested look.  
  
"Oh, really?"  
  
"Yep."  
  
"What's so great about knights?"  
  
"I don't know. I think it has to do with the legendary chivalry and courage, or something like that. Man, I'm hungry," I complained. Which was worse: the awful castle food, or the dull ache in my stomach? Hard decision. On one hand, I was not in any hurry to eat that shit again, but on the other, I hadn't eaten anything all day, and even disgusting stuff would taste good if you were starving, right?  
  
"Dinner isn't for another hour," he informed.  
  
"Oh great, what do we do until then?" I groaned, the emptiness in my stomach intensifying at the knowlege that I wouldn't be able to eat for an entire hour. Link gave me that oh-so-adorable, little-boy grin.  
  
"Shall we dance?" he suggested. The orchestra had been playing music all that time, I suppose, but I'd been so preoccupied with all the odd- looking people that I hadn't really noticed. And actually the music wasn't bad. Hylians do something right.  
  
"Dance?" I repeated. "I can't dance."  
  
"It's not hard," he assured, suddenly sweeping me into his arms. "Just go with it."  
  
"Easy for you to say," I replied, trying hard not to fall as he lead me in something akin to a quick waltz. "What if I end up stepping the wrong way or something?" He flashed his signature gorgeous smile.  
  
"NOBODY will be looking at your feet," he promised, twirling me around. "They'll all be wondering, 'Who is the beautiful lady dancing with Sir Link?'"  
  
"And what will you tell them, O handsome knight?" I quizzed, as he once again pulled me close.  
  
"I'll say that she is the creation of the Goddesses themselves, for no mortal could create something so wonderful."  
  
"You'll say nothing of her flaws, then?"  
  
"In my eyes, she has none," he answered, as we continued to twirl around the floor. He was so light on his feet, it was like we were floating. And he was holding me so close that I could feel his heart beating against mine. I had a feeling I was starting to blush, if I hadn't been already.  
  
"Really? What about her nasty attitude?"  
  
"She doesn't want anyone to get close to her, because she's been hurt. I don't hold that against her. She may act tough, but she's very sweet."  
  
The music stopped. He made no move to let me go. I found myself noticing again just how beautiful his eyes were. Deep, glittering blue; it was just like looking at the ocean.  
  
"I think-" My voice died, and I tried again. "I think that with an answer like that, they'll all be left with more questions than they had before."  
  
"If they have any others, they can find out on their own," he said, very softly. Once again, I became aware that we kept getting closer, and closer. My eyes began to close, and,  
  
Trumpets blared an elaborate fanfare. We both nearly jumped out of our skins.  
  
"Uh, it's dinner time," he said, studying his hands and trying to hide a deep blush. I was amazed. We'd been dancing like that for an hour? It had seemed like no time at all. But we must have been; everyone was filing out of the room and heading into the next, which I recognized as the dining hall from last time.  
  
"Okay," I said, silently wishing a horrible death unto the trumpeters. Like I said before, good things are always interrupted.  
  
***  
  
The castle gardens were beautiful. There were roses, orchids, lillies, and various other flowers in every color there was, and it was all illuminated by marble lamps carved into elegant statues. I had excused myself for some "fresh air" after the not-as-godawful-as-last-time-but-only- because-my-sense-of-taste-was-dulled-by-starvation dinner. Link had volunteered (read: demanded) to come with me.  
  
"So, now you don't trust me by myself?" I asked, as we walked slowly down one of the many winding cobblestone paths.  
  
"I trust you," he informed. "I just don't trust them," he added quietly, tilting his head toward a guard who was currently walking around aimlessly, 'guarding' the gardens. I smirked.  
  
"Your guard buddies? But aren't they suposed to be men of honor and chivalry?" I mocked. Link rolled his eyes.  
  
"They should be, but you'd be surprised. That one in particular... well, watch out for him, okay?"  
  
"Why? He's just a bonehead like the rest of them."  
  
"Well, he's a bonehead who informed me earlier that he would like to sleep with you," he informed, "and most likely with or without your consent."  
  
"He would, would he?" I growled, shooting a glare toward the guard. I grinned wickedly. "You think he'd still be interested if I cut off his-"  
  
"Millerna," he interrupted. "Please don't remove any of his body parts. I don't want you getting in any trouble for attacking a guard, that would be a very bad scenario. Just stay away from him. And if he gets too close, THEN you can hurt him," he continued, noticing my look of disappoinment. Okay, I was satisfied.  
  
"Fine," I agreed. "If he shows up one day without genitals, you'll know why." Link smiled, and led me to a small bench surrounded on three sides with tall hedges. There was a fountain in the middle of the hedge square, carved in the shape of three women with their arms above their heads, holding up a glass sphere. Each woman had inlaid jewels for eyes: one had rubies, one had emeralds, and the last had sapphires. The castle folk didn't do anything halfway. Except for the half-assed excuse for food, that is, but we won't get into that.  
  
We'd been sitting there a whole minute before I realized that his arm was wrapped around my waist, and that I was resting my head on his shoulder. My heart fluttered nervously, but I made no effort to move. I was much too comfortable. Quite honestly, I wouldn't have minded staying there like that all night.  
  
"This is probably one of those times when we look like lovers," I said. His free hand took mine, our fingers intertwining.  
  
"I know," he murmured. I closed my eyes and let myself relax against him. He let out that soft, gentle laugh. "Are you tired?" he asked. I nodded.  
  
"A little."  
  
"Come on, then," he said, pulling me with him as he stood. "I'll take you back to your room."  
  
***  
  
The trip back to my room was made in almost complete silence. Maybe we were both feeling a little shy about what had gone on at the ball and in the garden - I wasn't too sure myself, so I really can't give a definite answer. All I know is that, for one reason or another, we didn't have much to say until we got inside my room.  
  
"Did I act okay tonight?" I asked, beginning to take off the jewelry that I'd been adorned with prior to the ball. He smiled.  
  
"Not only did you act okay, but you acted perfectly charming."  
  
"Yeah, I was going for 'un-Millerna'," I informed, laughing.  
  
"But you did it very well," he complimented. He sighed. "I just can't wait till we get out of here and get to act like ourselves again." I think I just kind of stared at him.  
  
"Did I just hear that out of your mouth, O Hero of Time?" I teased. "And here, you're the one who wants ME to behave like someone else."  
  
"Hey, you think it never bugs me that I have to be who everyone here wants me to be? I know exactly how you feel."  
  
"Well, it's good to know I'm not alone."  
  
"You're not," he assured. "And I'll make sure you never will be." For the second time that night, I found myself staring into his eyes. He must have been doing the same, because a moment later he coughed nervously and looked away. "Uh, I should probably be going."  
  
"Yeah, I guess so. Goodnight."  
  
"Well, um, seeya tomorrow," he said, heading for the door. He turned back around when he got there. "And, Millerna? If you need me, or anything, my room's near that courtyard you like. I mean, you can't miss it, it's got this big dragon carved into the door."  
  
Okay," I replied, nodding my understanding. He went to open the door. "Um, Link?" I called after him. "What exactly qualifies as 'needing' you?" He failed miserably to hide a deep crimson blush.  
  
"We'll...discuss that when the situation arises. Goodnight."  
  
(A/N-... OMG, that sucked so bad... Sorry, writer's block induced chapter, the only way to get the creative juices flowing again. Please forgive me!) 


	30. Bad Memories

(A/N- Howdy again, y'all! I know it's taken me a while, and I'm still not entirely over my writer's block, but I'm gonna take a whack at it. And a response to The Pebble, who said (I summarize) "Millerna's lost her edge. Is there any way she can get it back?" The answer is yes, and no. Yes, she is still the same fiery and rather bitchy gal at heart, and you'll see it MANY more times throughout the duration of the story; but keep in mind, also, that whether she likes it or not, she's falling in love, and that changes everyone a bit. Because if she just kept acting the same toward Link as she did when they first met, he'd eventually decide "Well, fine, why should I keep trying for a girl who's a bitch to me?", give up on her thus, and my story would have an unhappy ending, ne c'est pas? I'm not insulting you, I'm just explaining to you my rationalization for her gradual character changes. Hope that clears it up a bit. Now, on with the 30TH CHAPTER!)  
  
( WARNING, this segment is another bloody heartbreaker, so all you emotional types may want to have Kleenex handy.)  
  
**The raid had been going on for almost an hour. Enemy thieves had ambushed the camp at midnight, and now here we sat, my sisters and I, in a small grotto, waiting for the danger to pass. Ayden had rushed us into hiding as soon as the attack had begun, then left, despite my desperate pleas, to help with the fight.  
  
"Don't worry about me," he'd said, flashing me a beautiful smile. "I have the eyes of a hawk and the reflexes of a cat, you know that better than anyone." Serenity and Lilliana had had to hold me back to keep me from following him into battle. And now I sat here, in this dark crevice in the mountainside, completely useless.  
  
"I can't stand this," I growled. "What if he needs me?!" Serenity shushed me and put a hand on my arm.  
  
"No, Millerna, I'm sure he'll be fine," she whispered in a voice that was obviously supposed to be comforting. "Ayden is one of the best fighters we have. He can certainly take care of himself without the help of a thirteen-year-old-girl. And besides, it would be unwise for you to go outside. A girl in the middle of thieves' raid will only get hurt, killed, or raped if she-"  
  
"I'm going to be raped anyway!" I snapped, slapping her hand away angrily. "Or have you forgotten what our purpose is? I'd rather be killed by a rival thief helping Ayden than be raped by that fucker Carlos after having been of no use at all!" Dana and Lilliana gasped.  
  
"Millerna, such language is not becoming of a lady!" Serenity scolded.  
  
"It takes honor to be a lady, and ours was stolen the moment we were brought here," I hissed. "I'm not a lady, and neither are you."  
  
"Millerna, that's not-" she was cut off by a cry of pain shooting through the air. My blood ran cold.  
  
"Ayden!" I yelped, jumping to my feet and scrambling out of the grotto.  
  
"No!" Serenity yelled after me. I ignored her, and kept running. Tents were on fire, men were lying everywhere in pools of their own blood, blades and arrows sticking out of their flesh at odd angles. What if Ayden shared that fate?  
  
"AYDEN!" I called, my voice drowned out by the raging battle still going on. "WHERE ARE YOU?!" My heart was pounding as though it might burst out of my chest. I couldn't find him! I spun around, feeling utterly helpless amid the clashing of swords, twanging of bows, and screams of the wounded. But there, in the moonlight, I saw a solitary figure at the water's edge. I knew even before I saw his face that this was Ayden, and I ran to him. He was nursing his left arm, and as I got close enough, I saw why: there was a dagger shoved straight through the upper arm.  
  
"Ayden!" I cried. He looked down at me, and seemed to forget about his pain.  
  
"Millerna?! I told you to stay with your sisters!" he chided. "You could get hurt out here!"  
  
"You're hurt, Ayden, I came to help you," I explained stubbornly, as I administered one of Aunt Miranda's techniques and quickly pulled the dagger out of his arm. He ground his teeth and gave a snarl of pain.  
  
"Couldn't you do these things more gently, Millerna? Wait, nevermind that, just get back to safety, you never know what could happen out-"  
  
Flit!  
  
Ayden didn't even have time to see the arrow before it traveled clean through his chest. A lung shot! I looked behind me, and felt anger boil up inside like a poison. The bowman was Carlos! He shrugged under my glare from atop his stallion.  
  
"A misfire. What a shame," he said easily, turning his mount around and trotting away.  
  
"YOU BASTARD!" I screamed at the top of my lungs to his retreating form.  
  
"Millerna...no." I looked back where Ayden had fallen, and dropped to my knees beside him in the sand, searching for my medicine pouch.  
  
"That bastard!" I hissed, trembling with rage. "That despicable son of a bitch!" Ayden looked up at me, and shook his head.  
  
"If he says it was a misfire, Millerna, it was a misfire. My cousin would not murder me," he said softly. A lie!  
  
"Don't talk like that," I demanded, ripping open my pouch. "You're not going to die. You can't die." He smiled sadly, and pushed the pouch out of my hands. Oh Gods, he was so pale, and his lips had taken on a bluish tint.  
  
"This is...a fatal wound. No one...is...indestructible," he said. He began to cough, and blood trickled out of the corner of his mouth. I wasn't sure when the tears had started, but they were streaming down my face in torrents as I took my friend in my arms.  
  
"I swear, on my life, that I will not rest until I avenge you. Carlos will die by MY hand!"  
  
"No, no, no. Millerna, don't let hatred destroy your soul. The first chance you get, run. Get as far away from here as you can, and start a new life, like we always said we would."  
  
"It won't be the same without you!"  
  
"You know I could never leave you," he assured, running a weak hand through my hair. "My body will be gone, but I swear, my soul will be with you forever. I'll always be beside you. I'll be there on your wedding day, and when you have children. So you see, you'll never be without me, not really."  
  
"I'll still miss you," I nearly sobbed. He took my face in his hands, and the complete lack of strength in them made it all too real that he was dying.  
  
"Don't cry, please," he said, wiping a tear from my cheek. "Promise me that when you think of me, far from now, you won't think only of this night. Promise me that you'll remember happier times as well. Can you do that for me?" I nodded, and he lay back onto the sand, seemingly satisfied. And in his last breath he added three words that almost killed me.  
  
"I love you."**  
  
(A/N- Oh shit, I made myself cry... Stupid Erin.)  
  
***  
  
I shot up in my bed, covered in a cold sweat.  
  
"Just a dream," I muttered, still shaking. I wiped my eyes, only to find that I'd been crying, too. I hated these nightmares, hated being shown the rerun of Ayden's death. Hadn't going through it once been torture enough? Obviously the powers that be didn't think so.  
  
Before I even realized what I was doing, I'd climbed out of bed, slid my feet into some silk slippers that matched my kimono, and exited my room. I wasn't completely sure of what I was doing even as I knocked on the elaborately carved door adjacent to my courtyard, but I found out soon enough. He took one look at me, and the first thing out of Link's mouth was,  
  
"What's wrong?"  
  
"Wow, am I that transparent?" A very weak attempt at a joke, made weaker by the fact that I was perfectly certain that my eyes were all red. "Lame as it probably sounds, I had a bad dream. Or a bad memory, to be more precise." He took me completely by surprise by embracing me warmly. And I took MYSELF completely by surprise by finding some comfort in this.  
  
"Do you want to tell me about it?" he murmured into my hair. I looked up at him and nodded. He sat down on the bed with me, and I began to tell him how Ayden had died.  
  
***  
  
"And, that's what you didn't want to tell me at the Forest Temple, isn't it?" he asked, brushing a few strands of hair behind my ear. Somewhere in the middle of my long tale, I'd ended up being pulled onto his lap. I didn't particularly mind, of course, but under the circumstances, I really couldn't enjoy this as much as I would have otherwise.  
  
"Yeah," I replied. He gave me his sweetest smile.  
  
"Do you feel any better now?"  
  
"Amazingly, yes," I answered. Who would have thought that TALKING about something awful would actually make it feel LESS awful?  
  
"Well, doesn't this seem familiar," he said. I sighed, and leaned my head against his chest.  
  
"I guess it does, doesn't it? Damn, the weight of the world is on your shoulders, and my best friend died in my arms. Our lives just suck, don't they?"  
  
"Sometimes," he agreed, cuddling me close. "But sometimes, I really can't complain too much." I actually smiled.  
  
"No, sometimes things work out okay," I agreed. He kissed my forehead.  
  
"Come on, you probably didn't get much sleep," he said, climbing back under the covers. "You can stay with me if you want." I gave him my best accusational look.  
  
"I thought you said we shouldn't sleep together anymore?" I reminded. He grinned.  
  
"Under the circumstances, I don't think it'll hurt anybody. Besides, I'll be right here if you have that dream again."  
  
"Guess this qualifies as needing you, then," I teased half-heartedly, as I got into the bed.  
  
"I'm fairly certain it falls under that category, yes," he replied. He gave me one last kiss on the cheek, and wrapped a protective arm around me.  
  
You know, I had no more nightmares.  
  
(A/N- yes, I realize it was short, but it's something, and it's for all you romantics out there. Peace and love. Catch ya later!) 


	31. Speechless

(A/N- I write again! I just want to do one review response before I get to the story. Candace, you said you didn't feel like the story was going anywhere. That's because I was working moreso on character development. The story will progress, I don't even know for how long, but character development is more important to me at this juncture. Just because ^_^ )  
  
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I was very reluctant to wake up, even as the sun streamed into the room through stained glass windows, bathing the walls in red, gold, blue, and green. But as hard as I tried, I couldn't fall back to sleep. That sucked, especially since Link seemed to be having no trouble at all staying asleep.  
  
'He doesn't look anything like the warrior he is,' I thought, looking into his peaceful face. Damn, how unfair was it that he was forced to risk life and limb - alone - for the sake of everyone in the world? Where was the point in it?  
  
I absentmindedly ran my fingers through his soft, golden hair. And while we're on the subject of rhetorical questions, why did he make me feel so unhealthy? My heart started pounding whenever I looked at him; my stomach did uncomfortable flips whenever I heard his voice.  
  
'I love him so much.'  
  
I shook my head violently. Where the hell had THAT come from?! That was the most unwelcome thought in my entire list of unwelcome thoughts!  
  
"I do not love people," I reminded myself firmly.  
  
"That's a shame." I almost jumped out of my skin.  
  
"I thought you were asleep!" I hissed, as Link tried rather unsuccessfully to hide his amusement at being able to startle me.  
  
"I was, until you started playing with my hair," he informed. I felt myself blush.  
  
"Uh...sorry," I said stupidly. He smiled.  
  
"Don't worry about it, it felt good." Sexual thoughts. Oh damn. I attempted to banish these images from my head in vain.  
  
"Well, we should probably be getting up now," I said, feeling suddenly very nervous about being in bed with him.  
  
"We don't have to," he stated, pointing to a (ridiculously fancy) clock in the corner. "We have five hours until breakfast." I took a moment to wonder why I'd woken up - by myself, no less - so early in the morning, then concluded that there WAS no rational explanation, other than the fact that hell must have frozen over.  
  
"Five whole hours?" I repeated. He nodded.  
  
"And since it will probably be a while before either of us is in a real bed again, I suggest that you enjoy it while it lasts," he advised. I relaxed again, and lay down on my side, propping myself up on my elbow.  
  
"So, um, do you want to talk about...anything?" I asked awkwardly. He looked thoughtful for a minute.  
  
"You know, there HAS been something bugging me," he began. "You know after that whole incident at the Forest Temple?"  
  
"Yeah?"  
  
"How did you get me back to the village? I mean, I know you're strong, but how did you manage that, and without being attacked?"  
  
"Actually, Saria came along and did this little Sagey-teleporty- whoosh thing to transport us back, so we didn't even have to go past those big gerbil thingies," I explained.  
  
"They're called Moblins," he corrected.  
  
"Yes, and they look like big gerbils," I announced. He smiled, then surprised me by pulling me into a gentle embrace.  
  
"What's that for?" I asked, feeling incredibly shy, and absolutely certain I was blushing like mad.  
  
"No real reason, I guess," he said softly, kissing my cheek. Now, I'm not completely certain why it took so long for me to notice, but at that moment it dawned on me that he'd been shirtless this whole time. And at that moment, my heart skipped several beats. Here we were, cuddling in bed, I wearing only a thin nightshift, and he naked from the waist up. I was quickly developing some very dirty thoughts, most of which would have been a hell of a lot of fun to act upon.  
  
"Oh," I replied. Damn, his eyes were beautiful. Of course, so was the rest of him, but there was just something about those deep blue eyes that was particularly enchanting. You could see all of his emotions in his eyes, even if he didn't show them otherwise. Maybe that was what drew me to them.  
  
"Did you sleep better in here?" he asked. I found myself nuzzling his neck.  
  
"Yes, I did," I murmured. He laughed quietly.  
  
"You know what this would look like to anyone who happened to see us, don't you?"  
  
"People are stupid," I declared, kissing his ear. Now I wasn't the only one who was blushing.  
  
"Be that as it may, I think maybe you had the right idea earlier. We probably shouldn't be doing this."  
  
"No," I agreed, feeling rather disappointed. "We shouldn't."  
  
"You should, uh, probably go back to your room and get dressed," he suggested. I nodded, climbing out of bed.  
  
"Yeah, you're right," I said. "Seeya later, I guess," I added. I was just about to open the door when,  
  
"Millerna...there's one last thing." I took my hand off the doorknob and turned to face him.  
  
"What is it?" I asked. I had never seen him look as nervous as he did at that moment.  
  
"Um, I've been...wanting to do something for a while," he began shyly, "and now seems as good a time as any." Okay, I was very, very confused. I was about to voice my puzzlement, but what happened next left me unable of speech.  
  
Link kissed me. On the lips. 


	32. It's a Bad Idea to Anger the Hero of Tim...

Link kissed me. On the lips.  
  
The butterflies that had been in my stomach before now seemed to have multiplied, and my heart was going a mile a minute. And I really couldn't have cared less. The feel of his warm lips on mine was something I had dreamed about, and now it was actually happening. I wanted this to last forever. But, obviously, it didn't.  
  
"Um...sorry about that," he said once he'd pulled away from me, blushing furiously. "Shouldn't have...not proper to..."  
  
"No, it was...I mean...I didn't mind," I assured, probably feeling just as shy as he did. We seemed to be having difficulty looking each other in the eye. I cleared my throat. "Er...well, I'm gonna...yeah," I finished stupidly, jerking my thumb toward the door. He nodded, keeping his eyes fixed on the floor.  
  
"Yeah...bye," he said. I dashed out into the hallway, shutting the door behind me. I was torn between screaming, laughing, and fainting. He. Had. Kissed. Me! I could hardly believe it was real! Had I not been A) wearing a nightgown, and B) incredibly clumsy when both feet weren't on something solid, I would have been compelled to turn cartwheels all the way back to my room.  
  
I felt more hyper than I ever had - including the hyperness of having drunk an entire pot of Aunt Miranda's wonderful and incredibly strong coffee (which I have done on more than one occasion). I managed to maintain my composure, however. NOTHING could have brought my spirits down!  
  
"Well, what DO we have here?" I jumped at the sound of the voice, and turned to face the intruder, who turned out to be none other than the guard Link had pointed out the other night. He smirked. Hmm, muscle-bound redhead, about six-foot-three...Yeah, no wonder he was looking so cocky.  
  
"Oh, go away," I sighed, rolling my eyes. He ignored this, and proceeded to answer his own question.  
  
"Looks to me like what we have is a little lady in only her nightgown leaving a man's room," he said. "Tsk, tsk. That's just unnacceptable, that is. Of course, it's not like nobody GUESSED you were Sir Link's whore..."  
  
"I'm quickly beginning to dislike you," I informed, silently willing myself NOT to kill him. "And I'm nobody's whore."  
  
"No? Well, my apologies," he mocked, giving an extravagant bow. "You SHOULD be more careful, though. Pretty little thing like you out here by her lonesome, and nearly naked at that. Could prove dangerous."  
  
"Thanks for the advice, asshole, but I'll take my chances," I snapped, making up my mind to just turn and walk away, rather than get myself into a fight with this guy. He had so much armor on, it would have been impossible to get a hit in. Come on, like you thought there was a MORAL reason why I'd refuse to beat the shit out of someone?  
  
"Now that isn't very nice," he informed, grabbing my wrist rather painfully and yanking me back around to face him. "You don't just turn away from a man when he's talking to you," he purred, taking a rather firm hold on my lower jaw with the other hand. 'Where can I hit him?' kept going through my mind, but it was useless: he was COVERED in steel. Now I was EXCEEDINGLY pissed off, but I was also starting to get the slightest bit scared. This guy was WAY bigger than me, and he was completely shielded from any blow I could deal to him. There was only one rational thing to do in this situation, and that was to talk my way out of it.  
  
"Well, that must be the problem, then," I replied nastily, "I wasn't aware that I was talking to a MAN." The guard's face contorted into a very ugly snarl, and he proceeded to slam my back - which, it should be noted, was bare due to the design of my nightgown - particularly hard against the nearest stone pillar. I've never been good at doing the rational thing...  
  
"You are quite the rude one," he growled, much too close for comfort. "And I think you should be taught some manners."  
  
"And YOU are quite the stupid one," I responded, reaching for the knife I kept strapped to my thigh. "And I-" I stopped dead.  
  
"You what?" he hissed. I could feel all the blood draining from my face. My knife was not there. There was, again, only one rational thing to do in this situation. And this time, I did it.  
  
"LINK!"  
  
Now, ninety-nine percent of the time, Link's the sweetest, gentlest person you could ever imagine. But during that one percent when he's not, he is downright scary.  
  
"WHAT THE HELL DO YOU THINK YOU'RE DOING?!" he roared, shoving the guard away from me with more force than I thought possible, given his wiry build. The guard was now on his back on the ground, looking not nearly as confident as he had a moment ago.  
  
"I-I-I'm s-s-sorry-"  
  
"HOW DARE YOU TRY TO HARM HER! I SHOULD KILL YOU RIGHT NOW!"  
  
"I-I-I know-" the guard stuttered, inching away from Link in utter terror.  
  
"But I won't," Link informed, glaring down at the guard with this look of utter contempt.  
  
"Y-You...won't?"  
  
"No."  
  
"Oh, THANK YOU, good Sir, I-" the guard's babbling was cut off by a scream of pain, as Link relieved him of his right hand, by way of very large sword.  
  
"Next time, Raphael," Link stated coldly, "I WILL kill you. As such, I suggest you leave this woman alone, if you value your filthy life. Do we have an understanding?" 'Raphael' nodded, nursing his new wound, and sobbing like a wuss.  
  
"Y-Yes, Sir."  
  
"Come on, Millerna," Link said, his tone having become warm and kind now that he was addressing me. "I'll take you back to your room."  
  
***  
  
"Did he hurt you?" Link inquired as soon as we were inside my room with the door shut. I considered lying, saying I was fine, but I found myself explaining how I'd been slammed so nicely against that pillar instead.  
  
"Let me see your back."  
  
"No."  
  
"Millerna, just let me see," he commanded, sitting me down on the bed. I pouted, but pulled my hair out of the way nonetheless, so he could examine my stinging back.  
  
"You've got some lovely cuts and bruises," he remarked, a hint of the anger he'd displayed earlier evident in his voice. "Millerna, you really should have come back into my room as soon as he threatened you."  
  
"I know," I grumbled.  
  
"Why didn't you?"  
  
"I don't know."  
  
Long, uncomfortable pause.  
  
"Millerna...did it have something to do with...what happened this morning?"  
  
"He accused me of being your whore, if that's what you mean," I muttered. He left his position in behind me for one in front of me.  
  
"Not exactly. I mean, did you stay out there...because you were afraid of me?"  
  
"Why would I be afraid of you?"  
  
"Well...I mean...I kissed you. You could have been afraid that I'd do something more..." Well, that couldn't possibly have been farther from the truth.  
  
"I wasn't afraid. I know you'd never hurt me. I guess I'm just...too stupid to get myself out of trouble before it's too late," I replied, laughing drily. He placed a warm, strong hand on my cheek.  
  
"You're not stupid. You're a little too impetuous and cocky for your own good, but you're certainly not stupid." Now, I'm not sure exactly why, but at that moment I had the intense urge to hug him. And I did, recieving a warm embrace in return.  
  
"I'll always be there for you, Millerna," he murmured into my ear. I snuggled into his chest.  
  
"I know."  
  
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(A/N- dude, that was TOO cute... I swear, my boyfriend's making me go all gushy-romantic. It's all his fault. Let's all blame him! But, hey, at least it's an update, eh, pals? He he, please don't hurt me for neglecting this fic for so long!) 


	33. Zelda's Worries

(A/N- Okay, I know I promised I wouldn't wait too long for the next update, I'm sorry. I actually had a dream about this fic the other night, so I figured it was meant to prompt me toward an update. Plus, my friend Theresa was going into Zelda-withdrawal again. Sorry, Theresa ^_^; I've still got some remnants of writer's block, though, so bear with me, okay? Thank you. I love you all.)  
  
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Millerna: It's about time, dammit...  
  
HealerAriel: Shut up, I've been preoccupied!  
  
Millerna: Yeah, preoccupied with your Legacy of Kain fic, you bitch.  
  
HealerAriel: Hey, it's not my fault! You try to resist leather-clad vampire guys...  
  
Millerna: -_-; You have unusual fetishes, Erin.  
  
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"Link, not that what you did wasn't incredibly gallant, but you really can't dismember everyone who tries to do harm to that girl."  
  
"I know, I know," I muttered, shuffling my feet. Zelda's lectures never failed to make me feel like a little kid being scolded by his mother.  
  
"You'd have done better to report Raphael's actions to me," she informed, pacing back and forth on the room's richly patterned purple-and- gold carpet and looking much older than the twenty-year-old woman I knew her to be.  
  
"Look, I wasn't thinking straight, alright?" I responded, a little more aggressively than was usually wise around royalty. "Din knows what would have happened if I'd let him go! I know Raphael, he'd have tried it again as soon as he got the chance!"  
  
"Link-"  
  
"I mean, damn, think if you were in Millerna's place!" Zelda looked a little shocked by my outburst, then her face took on an unreadable expression.  
  
"I HAVE thought about what it would be like in her place," she replied quietly, staring at a colorful stained glass window on the far wall. "More than you know."  
  
"Then can't you see why I couldn't let Raphael get off unscathed?!"  
  
"Calm down, Link," she said placatingly. "There's no need to shout."  
  
I groaned, but apologized.  
  
"Sorry. It won't happen again," I promised.  
  
"I can understand why you did it, however," she continued, still in that soft, almost mournful tone. "I suppose I can't hold you responsible, really. You were just protecting the woman you love."  
  
"Th-the woman I-"  
  
"Did you think you were being discreet about it?" she asked, giving me a hint of a teasing smile. "I've known you for ten years, Link, you're very easy to read. You adore that girl, and everyone knows it."  
  
"Oh," I responded stupidly, probably blushing my head off. "I...I see." Zelda sighed deeply, and began to look gravely serious.  
  
"But, your relationships aside," she began, starting to pace again, "there have been...rumors of late."  
  
"Rumors?"  
  
"Not even rumors, per se, just whispered suspicions amongst the townsfolk. They think...well, odd things have been happening recently. You know, mysterious happenings that would be overlooked normally."  
  
"As in?" I prompted.  
  
"Livestock disappearing, people going missing from villages, sightings of strange creatures. Sometimes just an inexplicable feeling of uneasiness. Usually people wouldn't write them off as anything serious, but they've been following so closely one after another. Since approximately three weeks ago, I believe."  
  
This wasn't sounding too good. It was about three weeks ago, wasn't it, that I'd had that dream..?  
  
"Nobody wants to say it outright, of course," Zelda continued solemnly, her face having become quite pale and her hands shaking a little, "but I'm sure they have been thinking what I have."  
  
"What do you think is causing this?" I asked, already knowing the grim answer all too well. She looked me straight in the eye.  
  
"I think Ganondorf has returned to Hyrule."  
  
**********  
  
I lay on my stomach on the huge bed, after having taken a long, warm bath to clean the newly-begotten cuts on my back. I had eventually had to call Giselle in to wash my back for me, finding it too hard to reach on my own. Of course, she'd flipped out and demanded to know what happened. I'd lied to her, naturally; I couldn't bring myself to destroy her naive trust in people.  
  
"Oh, you poor dear," she cooed, continuing her self-appointed duty of applying healing balm to my wounds. "You really must be more careful, the staircases can be very dangerous!"  
  
Falling down the stairs. A lame story, but she bought it.  
  
"Yeah," I agreed, trying to relax while she rubbed the cold, stinging balm all over my back. "I'm pretty clumsy."  
  
"We all are when we're half-asleep," she assured, capping the little ointment jar and rising from the bed. "Now, you lie there a bit longer, and don't put a shirt on until the balm soaks in, otherwise it'll just rub off."  
  
"Okay. Thanks."  
  
"You're welcome. I hope you feel better, milady," she said, backing respectfully out of the room and closing the door. I groaned. The situation wouldn't be so bad, but here I was top-naked in an incredibly cold room. And beside that, my back still hurt. And I was bored. And I needed coffee.  
  
And I was kind of worried that Link was getting a killer lecture from the princess about why Raphael and his hand shouldn't have been parted.  
  
It turned out I didn't need to worry about him for long, however, because at that moment said Hylian hero made his grand reentrance.  
  
"Millerna-"  
  
"Finally, I was beginning to think you'd been locked in the dungeon," I joked.  
  
Where his expression had at first been of the preoccupied variety, it quickly changed to an embarrassed one as he blushed and looked away, covering his eyes.  
  
And I belatedly realized I had sat up upon his arrival. With no shirt on.  
  
I grabbed one of the silk pillows and clutched it to my chest, with the distinct impression that I was blushing just as much as Link was.  
  
"Sorry," we said in unison, then instantly replied "Don't worry about it," in the same fashion. He coughed nervously.  
  
"Uh, I should have knocked," he admitted, still bright red and now shifting where he stood as though it was impossible to find a comfortable way to position himself.  
  
"Link? Is there something wrong?" I asked, trying to figure out his movement.  
  
"No, nothing!" he insisted, looking completely and inexplicably mortified.  
  
"You're sure?"  
  
"Yes. I'm positively fine. No, nothing wrong at all, just a little, uh, hard to gather my thoughts. I'll, er, come back later," he added, sprinting out of the room.  
  
"What the hell was that all about?" I wondered aloud.  
  
(A/N- *evil chuckle* Sorry Link, I had to do that...) 


	34. Confessions

(A/N- I'm surprised at you guys, I was expecting a lot of giggles about the cause of Link's behavior ^_~ Be advised, I'm forcing myself to write this chapter out of love for my readers and the characters, not because I have any really great ideas. So, if it's bad... that's why.)  
  
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I fell down onto my bed. Goddesses, how embarrassing had THAT been!? Millerna's reaction - or lack thereof - seemed to imply that she hadn't noticed it, but still... I glared down at myself. Being a eunuch seemed a very attractive prospect at that moment...  
  
'I'm really beginning to hate you,' I silently informed the offending piece of anatomy, which retorted by throbbing painfully. Okay, maybe insulting it wasn't the best course of action...  
  
"Shit," I hissed, staring in the general direction of the ceiling. "I get the point, alright?! You hear me, Nayru?!"  
  
A gust of wind blew through the leaves of the cypress tree outside my window, sounding uncannily like the goddess's response of gleeful laughter. "You know you want her, Link," she was whispering. "And she wants you; We made her for you, the three of Us. Take her."  
  
Well, maybe she wasn't REALLY saying it, but that sure as hell was what it sounded like. Nayru seemed to be having her way with my mind lately; Nayru, the goddess of wisdom, emotion, and sex. Wisdom had certainly been pushed aside...  
  
Everyone knew that each person was born under the protection of at least one of the Golden Goddesses. Some people seemed to be favored by two, or even all of them, but there was always one goddess who liked a person the most. How anyone could really tell early on, I'm not sure, but eventually it always became clear which one loved you more.  
  
Some people were born under Din: goddess of power, battle, victory, and luck. Din's favorites tended to be royalty, generals, politicians, and just about anyone who had unusually good fortune. Nayru protected the sages, artists, musicians, and prostitutes (no, seriously, I'm not making that one up!).  
  
And then there was my patron, Farore, goddess of courage, nature, and healing. Above all, Farore loved the heroic types - and I'm not just bragging, either. Her people were the warriors, the medicine men, and all those who devoted their lives to the protection and well-being of others.  
  
I'd once tried, out of boredom, to decide which goddess was Millerna's patron, without much luck; she had some attributes of each one, so it was kind of impossible to tell. She could fight, she could heal, and if my current physical state was any indication, she sure as hell had sex appeal.  
  
Another ache in that region reminded me that she was, just maybe, not the right person to be thinking about at the moment. I tried to fill my mind with other things: Ganondorf, for example. Ganondorf, or Rauru, or King Zora, or Koume and Kotake. Or perhaps all five, prancing around together.  
  
Horrific as that mental image was, it kept being pushed aside. And it was always replaced by Millerna, naked from the waist up as she'd been, and blushing becomingly. I felt the flesh start to harden again, and seriously considered just ripping the damned thing off to put an end to that problem.  
  
"What, so I can't even THINK about her from now on without...THAT happening?" I groaned, covering my face. "What did I do to piss You off, Nayru? I'd really like to know."  
  
***  
  
I think it might have been a full hour before I saw Link again, and when I did, he was still looking very uncomfortable. He just shrugged it off when I asked him what was wrong, and settled himself in a chair across the room from me. I was a little hurt and confused that he was keeping such a distance, but I tried not to let it show.  
  
"Millerna, I think it would be best for us to leave the castle today," he informed, looking pointedly away from me.  
  
"Why?" I asked, confused, but none too depressed about it. I'd been wanting to leave since we'd gotten there - the sooner, the better.  
  
"Well, you see, there's this...thing going on. And Zelda thinks that the Gerudos might have some information about it. And after we get to Gerudo Valley," he continued, "I think it would be best if you stayed with them."  
  
"You're tired of dragging me around," I interpreted, forcing an unconvincing smile.  
  
"No! No, I'm...never. It's just... Look, Millerna, it's not safe for you to be in the castle-"  
  
"Then let me stay with you!"  
  
"That would be even MORE dangerous," he answered, looking so incredibly serious that you'd think someone had just died. "Millerna, the castle is very, VERY badly protected, and I'm only one man."  
  
"The hell you are, you're the fucking Hero of Time!"  
  
"That doesn't mean anything! Look, whenever something bad happens, the immediate targets are Hyrule Castle, and me. And you know what, so be it, I don't even care anymore what happens to me, or anybody else in the world as long as you're not hurt!"  
  
"But WHAT is going to happen? Link, what the hell is going on?"  
  
He studied his hands in silence for a moment, and took a deep breath before responding.  
  
"Do you... remember what I told you? About Ganondorf?"  
  
"Yeah, vicious psychopath, they locked him in oblivion or whatever, so what?"  
  
"And do you remember how I was having those nightmares?" I nodded. "Well, those dreams of mine have a tendency to be more or less prophetic. And, weird things have been going on lately - the same things that happened the last time he tried out a hostile takeover."  
  
"So, what, he broke himself out of his spirit-prison and is now trying to control the world?" I asked incredulously.  
  
"Zelda and I find it more likely that someone LET him out."  
  
"Who the hell'd want to do that?"  
  
"Someone who thought he'd share the power. Zelda has dreams too, you see, and they're a lot more vivid than mine; she saw the person who let him out, remembers what he looked like."  
  
"So?" I shrugged. "What does that have to do with anything, why would I be in any danger?"  
  
"Because Carlos let him out."  
  
"WHAT?!" I yelled, jumping to my feet. "That bastard, I'll kill him!"  
  
"No, you won't! I'm going to take you with me to Gerudo Valley, and you're going to stay there! They're the only ones I know can keep you safe!"  
  
"Link, I need my revenge! I promised Ayden I'd kill him!"  
  
"And I promised myself that I would never let any harm come to you!"  
  
"WHY THE HELL WOULD YOU GO AND DO A STUPID THING LIKE THAT?!"  
  
"BECAUSE I LOVE YOU, DON'T YOU GET IT?!"  
  
Complete and total silence. I was too stunned to reply. Link had risen to his feet during our yelling contest, and now he just stood there, staring at the floor and blushing.  
  
"I do," affirmed softly, chancing a glance up at me. Seconds later I found myself clasped firmly in his arms, holding onto him with all my strength.  
  
"I love you," I promised into the crook of his neck, not even noticing that his tight embrace was not a very good match for the lacerations on my back. Okay, I lie, it hurt like a mother fucker, but it was dutifully ignored. "I love you so much, Link. I love you more than I've ever loved anyone, that's why I want to stay with you. How can I help you if I'm with the Gerudos?"  
  
"I don't want you to help, I want you to be safe. Millerna, it's more dangerous than you think, and I'd die if anything happened to you. I don't care if the rest of Hyrule goes up in flames, so long as you're safe. If that means I'm a horrible person, then so be it, but you're all that matters to me."  
  
"And what if you die, just like Ayden did? What am I supposed to do then? Just live with the fact that I could have helped you, and didn't? Goddammit, Link, how am I supposed to go through life knowing that?" I demanded, willing myself not to cry, even as tears started to form behind my eyes. He tilted my chin up, and gave me a cocky grin.  
  
"Me, die? I'm the fucking Hero of Time."  
  
"Arrogant bastard," I accused, kissing him full on the lips. 'All things considered,' I mused to myself as he returned the gesture all too willingly, much more assured of himself than he had been that morning, 'this hasn't really been such a bad day for us so far...'  
  
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.  
  
(A/N- there, you got a plot point, fluff, sexual innuendos, and a declaration of love in the same chapter. Who do you love, I hope?) 


	35. Sprites' Grotto

(A/N- well, this has come relatively sooner than all my other updates, so I think that deserves a celebration, lol. Oh my God, they're making a new Zelda game! AND LINK LOOKS SO HOT!!! fangirl scream I can't wait for it to come out, those graphics KICK ASS! Oh, er, on with the story...)  
  
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After having breakfast (gag) in Zelda's private parlor, Link and I started on the two-day ride to Gerudo Valley. I was still a little annoyed that he was going to drop me off with them while he went off to fight BOTH our battles... but then that vehement declaration of love would come back to me, and I'd just kind of sit there with a fluttery feeling in my stomach. I guess maybe deep down inside I knew he'd be safe, because I didn't feel too terribly worried; just kind of cheated of my promised vengeance.  
  
"I still think you should let me kill Carlos," I told him grumpily for probably the hundredth time that day. He smirked.  
  
"You know, young ladies such as yourself shouldn't be so preoccupied with murder. It isn't healthy."  
  
"I do a lot of things that aren't healthy, but as you can see, here I am, alive and well."  
  
"Alive, yes. Well is debatable," he added, winking. I made a face at him.  
  
Amazing. Even after admitting we were in love, we still acted the same as we had before. Funny thing was, I couldn't really remember FALLING in love with him. Maybe it really isn't possible to fall in love with someone at any particular moment. Maybe it's just one of those gradual things that hit you one day, much like an oncoming stampede would do. Hell, I could hardly remember NOT loving him. Crazy.  
  
We were both still a little apprehensive about sleeping outside after what had become known as the Forest Temple Incident. But, in all honesty, we did need sleep, so Link managed to scout out an underground grotto (he has this little rock thingie that vibrates, or something like that). Said grotto was floored with plush grass and featured a couple of trees and a little pond. I've said it once, and I'll say it again: Link can really pick the spots.  
  
With Navi nowhere in sight, we decided there was no point in sleeping on seperate bedrolls to appease her. Ironically though, we still felt shy about seeing one another getting undressed, so we hung the sheet from the unused bedroll between two of the trees as a sort of screen. After having stripped out of my clothes, I noticed I'd gotten my period again. Two months now I'd known Link, I mused to myself as I tried to wash the bloodstain off of the underwear I'd had on. Futile, of course; menstrual bloodstains are all but impossible to remove.  
  
He was already settled into the bed by the time I was finished dressing. But then, I reminded myself, all he had to do was take stuff off. Speaking of which, he was shirtless again, causing my heart to perform its customary leap as I cuddled up to him.  
  
"Hey, no weapons," he remarked, as his hand "accidentally" brushed against my thigh.  
  
"No need for them," I yawned. "It's just you and me down here. Kinda romantic, actually."  
  
"Mmm," he replied, combing his fingers through my hair. He laughed. "Never thought I'd hear you say the word 'romantic'."  
  
"Hard to believe, huh?"  
  
"Yeah. But nice," he assured, wrapping me securely in his arms. "I can't really imagine what my life would be like without you in it." I shook my head.  
  
"And starting out, we couldn't go five minutes without bickering. Go figure."  
  
"So much for that age-old notion of love at first sight," he agreed. "Attraction at first sight, however, is extremely possible."  
  
"I wanted you the second I saw you," I informed, kissing his cheek.  
  
"I just have that effect on women sometimes," he responded, giving me a wicked little smirk. It should be noted that all manner of wicked or cocky looks in Link's repertoire are rendered completely useless once one gets to know him. After that, they just make him look cute.  
  
I heard a particularly menacing howl from directly above us. I think I must have shivered, because he tightened his grip on me.  
  
"It can't get down here," he promised. I understood that, of course, but it's kind of a reflex to be nervous when you're really close to something that once tried to eat you. I had the fleeting desire to yell out "Haha! You can't get me!", but I refrained. I smiled to myself; this little grotto looked like one of those secret hiding places you dream of as a kid, where nothing and nobody can bother you.  
  
"Can these little holes in the ground be our method of camping from now on?" I asked hopefully, as the creature outside gave another frustrated howl.  
  
"I can't see why not," he said. "It is nice, isn't it?" I nodded. Now, of course I was mildly curious as to HOW all these grottoes got here, but I didn't care too much at the moment because I was tired - and because the sexiest man alive was barechested and in bed with me, but that's a whole different story.  
  
I woke up sometime during the middle of the night; there was a thunderstorm going on, so I figured the thunder must have woken me. I could see the trees and the pond from my vantage point - and they were glowing. As soon as I was a bit more lucid, however, I realized that they were not glowing at all: there were elemental sprites all around them, each giving off its own bright aura.  
  
I didn't dare move, afraid that I'd scare them all away if I let on that I was awake. 'No wonder this place felt magical,' I thought, watching the tiny beings flitting around tending to the grotto. Without any warning, a woodsprite stopped inches from my face and regarded me with jewel-like eyes, lightly fluttering her gorgeous gossamer wings. I felt myself smile.  
  
The sprite spoke, though I couldn't understand her; her words sounded like nothing more than bell chimes. I could hardly believe this was happening, I'd heard stories about sprites and nymphs all my life, and now I was seeing them!  
  
I was somehow compelled to sit up, and I was glad that none of them disappeared when I did so. A watersprite with crystalline blue wings came over and landed in my palm, sitting down cross-legged to look up at me. After studying me for a bit, she turned her huge sapphire eyes on Link's sleeping form. She said something to me in the same bell-chime voice as the first sprite. I shook my head and shrugged to indicate to her that I didn't understand what she was saying.  
  
She then took me completely by surprise by resorting to pantomime. In succession, she pointed to me, placed her hands over her own heart, and then pointed to him. I took that to be translated as her asking if I loved him, and I nodded. She replied with an approving smile, and returned my nod as if to say that such had been a good choice.  
  
I had to laugh - even SPRITES found Link hot! I had the brief understanding that maybe that accounted for Navi's behavior, but then again, she was a fairy, not a sprite. Fairies are fundamentally more obnoxious, and quite a bit less useful, but I'll go over the various differences between fairies and sprites and nymphs later on if I feel like it.  
  
The little watersprite now adopted a motherly expression and pantomimed that I must go back to sleep - which consisted of pointing at me, then resting her head on her folded hands. I nodded again, and she flitted back into the pond with the tiniest of splashes as I lay back down.  
  
Still smiling widely, I snuggled back up to Link, and he unconsciously wrapped an arm around me. Sure, at that exact moment an evil maniac was plotting world domination with my worst enemy at his right hand, but I was spending the night in a magic grotto with Hyrule's greatest hero, who had only hours ago pledged his love to me. From where I was standing, life was looking pretty good.  
  
(A/N- No plot points, no action. Pure fluff chapter, and I loved writing it. Suck it up.) 


	36. Gerudo Valley

(A/N- ::dodges random pointy things thrown at her head:: Um, I love you guys! You still love me, right? Right?! DON'T KILL ME!

It seems has made the lovely impromptu decision to veto the existence of asterisks - or, however you spell the name of those little star-looking thingamawhatsits - hence the screwed up formatting of the previous chapter. I am too lazy to fix that one, but all future chapters will be sans asterisks. But on the upside, ITALICS SHOW UP! W00T!)

_I could get used to this_, I thought. Somehow, waking up in the morning didn't suck when I was wrapped up in Link's strong arms. His lack of shirt at the moment didn't exactly hurt either, I decided.

"Good morning," he said, reaching a hand up to stroke my hair. I sighed. Yeah, I could _definitely_ get used to this.

"'Morning," I returned, opening my eyes to look at him. I smiled, and combed my fingers through his sleep-tousled, baby-soft hair. He started to blush, which made him look even more adorable.

"I love you," he said in that shy tone of voice that makes me totally melt everytime he speaks, let alone professes his love to me.

"I love you back," I replied, pulling myself up to kiss him.

Only seconds after our tender moment, Navi chose to drop in and demand that we get up, get dressed, and get going. Personally, I wouldn't have minded cuddling with Link for another couple of hours, but my eagerness to finally meet the (in)famous Gerudos won out on me, and Link and I were soon getting dressed on our respective sides of our impromptu privacy screen.

I blushed as I remembered he'd seen me topless the previous morning. He hadn't said anything about it since. Maybe he was just being a gentleman about it... but what if he'd been really disappointed? Now there was a sinking feeling in my stomach. _Oh, come on,_ I scolded myself, _this is such a stupid thing to worry about!_

* * *

We arrived in Gerudo Valley right before sundown, to a hell of a welcoming party composed entirely of beautiful women clad in harem garb - which they somehow managed to look utterly badass in.

"It's about time you visited, we were getting pretty damn anxious," said a woman with a constant self-assured smirk on her tanned face.

"Nice to see you, too, Nabooru," he said, grinning and hopping off Epona to shake her hand. In stark contrast to, like, every other person I'd met in Hyrule, Nabooru noticed me as soon as she'd finished greeting Link. Her smirk grew.

"Cute girl, kid, good job," she remarked, nudging him in ribs. I think I was blushing just as much as Link was at that particular moment, as I slid off Ebony's back. Nabooru, being the very extroverted person she'd shown herself to be already, came right up to me and conducted our brief introductions, which were basically the same as any until she happened to add that it was "cool that the kid finally found himself a woman."

"Nabooru, that's kinda-" Link didn't have the chance to finish saying whatever he was about to, because the rest of the Gerudos were busy loudly agreeing with Nabooru's sentiments, and at the same time making plans to throw a party to celebrate. (Personally, I got the impression that they were looking for any reason to party, and we were simply convenient.)

"Oh, now these clothes won't do at all," a Gerudo wearing bright red remarked, examining the sleeve of my left arm. "C'mon, girlie, let's get you dressed for a party!"

I managed to shoot a desperate glance at Link before I was led into one of the sandstone buildings by Red Clothes and three other women, who immediately started babbling about which color and size they should dress me in.

"By the way, darlin'," Red Clothes said, "my name's Kali. That's Toki, Freya, and Ishtar," she added, gesturing in turn to the woman with tattoos, the woman with dreadlocks, and the woman wearing a particularly large machete at her waist. The one called Freya briefly looked me over, before crossing to the opposite wall and flinging open a large wardrobe full of brightly colored clothing.

"What color, ladies?" Freya asked, her voice muffled as her entire head was inside the wardrobe.

"I think green would suit her well, Freya," Kali suggested, as the dreadlocked woman continued to root through the wardrobe.

"Aha! Got it!" Freya called, tossing out a bundle of diaphanous emerald green fabric which Kali caught easily, and shook out to reveal a Gerudo outfit with gold trim. I felt my face getting hot.

"You expect me to wear that?" I asked, horrified.

"Why not? This is the desert, you won't catch a cold," Ishtar pointed out.

"Well, no, but..."

"Aww, she's shy!" Toki cooed. "How cute!"

"Oh, is that it?" Kali asked. "There's nothing to worry about, kid, we're all women here-"

"-With the exception of Link," Freya interjected helpfully.

"And I'll bet _he's _seen you in less anyway," Toki finished, winking. I wanted to protest, but they kinda had a point there. Yes, Link had seen my breasts, so why was I so reluctant to let him see me with a bare midriff? Well... because I'm weird like that.

"I still don't wanna wear it," I grumbled, blushing like hell. I'd hoped for them to leave me alone. I got the opposite reaction.

"Ooh, so he _has_ seen you in less?" Ishtar asked eagerly, looking like she wanted nothing more than to hear every detail. Now that I saw her up close, she might actually have been a year or so younger than me (the heavy makeup the Gerudos wear makes no age distinction possible from a distance of more than a few feet). I crossed my arms and looked away.

"It was completely accidental," I assured firmly. There was a round of giggles, which indicated that they didn't believe me for a minute. I growled.

"Oh, just wear the thing," Kali laughed. I shook my head. "C'mon, Link'll really like it, it'll be worthwhile..."

If possible, I think I blushed even more.

* * *

"So, what brings you to this neck of the woods, Hero Boy?" Nabooru asked, flopping carelessly onto one of the silk-upholstered lounge chairs in her private quarters.

"Honestly, Nabooru," I cried, my hand flying over-dramatically to my heart, "whenever I'm here, you act like I have some kind of hidden agenda! I'm hurt by your suspicion!"

"Don't give me any bullshit, kid; you're not the type of guy who just drops in for a visit," she stated flatly, looking dead serious now that we were alone. "You might get it past the other girls, but I've learned not to take anything for face value. You're here because something's up. I want to know what it is, and how the Gerudos can help."

One thing you could definitely say for Nabooru - the woman was sharp, one of the smartest people in Hyrule, and a military genius to boot. She instantly saw the big picture behind everything; it was possibly why I valued her so highly as an ally.

"Zelda thinks that Ganondorf is planning another attack," I explained quietly (There was no need for it, really, as the thick stone walls were basically soundproof, but I've gotten a little paranoid over the years).

"Shit," Nabooru hissed. "That's all we need, that maniac returning. But the girls are loyal to me, at least. I can assure you he'll have no backing by my people."

"He doesn't need it, Nabooru," I said. "He has a new helper, one with plenty of minions under him. Name's Carlos, he leads a group of thieves from the land beyond the mountains."

"How many?"

"Close to a thousand," I answered.

"I can rally the girls for battle."

"No. You have only three hundred warriors, it would be a slaughter."

"A hundred and fifty now, actually," she said, smiling wryly. "That's the downside to female armies; the warriors always get pregnant at the worst possible times." I gave her an incredulous look.

"You're offering to go into battle knowing you have only a hundred and fifty fighters? Every Gerudo warrior will die if you go through with this, Nabooru, yourself included!"

"And we will die with honor. I could ask for no better death for myself and my warriors."

I thought for a while, trying to figure out a way to make the outcome more favorable.

"Maybe we could improve the odds a little," I suggested. "I'm sure Darunia and Ruto would send their armies if asked. That would bring us up to about eight hundred and twenty-"

"-And with Zelda's soldiers in the mix, we would make an even thousand," Nabooru finished, grinning.

"Ganondorf's sure to have monsters with him as well as men, though," I reminded. Nabooru waved her hand dismissively.

"We have an advantage over monsters: they're stupid, we're not. We can deal with them very easily. Now come on, I believe we have a party to attend," she reminded, her grin broadening as she stood and went for the door.

"Wait, Nabooru, I have a favor to ask."

"Yeah, kid?"

"Look... if this whole matter with Ganondorf goes down like we think it will, I might... I mean... would it be possible for Millerna to stay here in the valley? I want to keep her as safe as possible."

Nabooru gave me an 'aww, how sweet' look that would have been infuriating under different circumstances.

"She's welcome here for as long as she'll stay," she assured, before letting herself out of the room.

* * *

The party was already in full swing when Nabooru and I finished our meeting, and I swear the Gerudos have as much wine and rum around for their parties as the Gorons do, possibly more. They also have annoyingly high tolerances to alcohol, as I discovered once when Kali roped me into having a drinking contest with her - of course, I'd been only seventeen at the time, so I had an excuse for my inability to imbibe as much as she did without vomiting. Well, in my opinion, anyway.

I sat down across from Nabooru on one of the big logs surrounding the bonfire as the majority of the tribe continued to dance around, sing, and chug their drinks. Kali was suspiciously absent (usually she kept herself situated by a keg), but I realized that she and a few others had earlier abducted Millerna in the name of fashion.

_Damn, what could they possibly be doing that would take this long?_

There was a sudden commotion coming from the closest ground-floor door of the Gerudos' stone city. I recognized the voices of Kali and Toki, and then came the distinct sound of Millerna threatening them with physical violence involving a spoon if they didn't allow her to change clothes.

"You picked a feisty one," Nabooru noted with a smirk. I grinned sheepishly and scratched the back of my head.

"That's Millerna for you," I said weakly, as Toki and Kali seemed to have somehow managed to force Millerna outside. I glanced over to see what they'd dressed her up in that could get her so angry.

I think I stopped breathing.

Her long hair had been let out of its usual ponytail and fell down her back in a sheet of glistening obsidian, and her white skin had taken on that lovely moonlit glow. But it was when I looked down that my heart skipped a few beats. They'd put her in an iridescent green number that, between the barely-existant shirt and the harem pants that rested incredibly low on her hips, showed quite a bit more of her than it concealed. Which wasn't to say she wasn't putting up a valiant effort, with one arm crossed over her breasts and the other hand hiding her navel.

"Breathe, kid," Nabooru suggested helpfully a few seconds before Millerna sat down next to me, arms still crossed about the pieces of her anatomy she wished to conceal. If I hadn't been blushing before, I certainly was now.

"They made me wear this," she grumbled unhappily, shooting a glare at the four red-haired women in a giggling cluster by the door. "Urge to kill rising..."

"Oh, something's rising right about now," Nabooru stated, looking pointedly at me, "but it sure as hell ain't the urge to kill." I coughed and sputtered a few moments before managing an embarrassed

"Nabooru!"

"Couldn't resist," she admitted, laughing at my obvious discomfort like a particularly cruel older sister. Millerna continued to grumble about her clothing. I slipped my arm around her waist and pulled her closer to me, kissing her on the forehead, cheek, and earlobe. Nabooru had the decency not to comment, satisfying herself with a knowing smirk instead. _I'm gonna spar with her later..._

"You look nice," I whispered reassuringly into Millerna's ear. I felt her shiver. Was she cold? It did get a little chilly in Gerudo Valley at night... I held her even closer.

"I'm gonna kill Kali," she declared. "I can't believe the bitch dressed me this way..."

"Just be thankful Navi isn't around to share her opinion on it," I teased, wondering briefly where Navi _had_ gotten to.

"I'm thankful _whenever_ she isn't around," Millerna growled, modesty seemingly forgotten as she utilised both hands in making a violent gesture demonstrating what she'd like to do to Navi. My eyes fell on her wonderfully soft-looking belly, then up to her small, round breasts. I gulped. _Thin fabric, cool breeze, oh goddesses!_

I cleared my throat, embarrassed, and looked away, silently cursing Nayru for putting more impure thoughts in my head, and imploring Farore for guidance. My only response was a now-familiar physical reaction.

This was going to be a long night...


	37. Nayru's Plan

(A/N- ::cringe:: Only in retrospect do I realize how much the last few chapters sucked... ::groan:: I'm considering just taking this fic down and discontinuing it, if you want the honest truth, because there's maybe three people who are actually reading it anymore. If you want me to continue writing and posting it, please tell me so, because I'm getting a little discouraged here. Plus, I have a lot to do with school and work and martial arts, so if you want me to continue using my increasingly limited free time to write this, some moral support would be uber.)

WARNING: LIME CONTENT (up to and including third base) IN THIS CHAPTER. If this offends you... well, you probably wouldn't be reading this fic, now that I think about it. But don't read unless you're sure nobody who cares will be looking over your shoulder. This is for all of you who've been wanting to beat Link and Millerna over the heads with a frying pan for spending thirty-plus chapters blushing at each other. I know Theresa, Erika, and Heidi can't be the only ones. But you know what, if you don't like it, don't flame - just stop reading it, and don't review at all, because flames piss me off, and my self-esteem is low enough as it is.

* * *

"Wow, you are definitely a mediocre swordswoman," Link teased as he effortlessly blocked my swing for the millionth time. We'd gotten a little bored of the Gerudo party, and decided to spar in the big archery range behind the city after a brief excursion to the armory to find me a sword to use.

"Hey, I'd like to see _you_ try to battle in this get-up!" I growled, frustrated, as I continued to slash at him, and he continued to parry every blow flawlessly. He grinned.

"Your clothing is not your problem," he informed. "Your problem is that you fight by swinging your sword around like a drunken madwoman; swordfighting takes strategy, not just hacking away at your opponent," he added. Fed up, I threw the sword down and landed a turning side kick to his stomach. I didn't put much power behind it, I just wanted to wipe the cocky smirk off his face for a few seconds.

"I never liked using swords anyway," I snapped, crossing my arms and turning my back to him, my ego severely bruised.

"Sore loser," he said, chuckling. I felt my cheeks flaming in anger, but he was right - I hated losing to anyone. "You can't win all the time."

"That does nothing to change the fact that I despise being bested, particularly by _you_," I huffed. He hugged me from behind, and my heart melted instantly. "Don't do that, I'm trying to be mad at you."

"I know that," he said, kissing my temple. "I'm creating a diversion."

"I hate you."

"No, you don't."

"No, I don't," I agreed after a few seconds, as I turned around to return his embrace. I'm not sure how long we stayed like that, wrapped up tightly in each other's arms, but it was interruped far too soon, and far too loudly.

"Aren't they _cuuuuuute_?"

We jumped apart to see Nabooru standing a few yards away, smirking her head off.

"Can I help you, Nabooru?" Link ground out between clenched teeth. Nabooru waved her hand dismissively.

"Nah, just felt like checking up on you kids, you've been away from the party for a while, and we were getting a little worried," she explained. "Though honestly, you two go off alone for a few hours, nobody knows what you're up to... Damn, I was hoping to at _least_ catch you kissing."

"At least?!" I cried indignantly, an embarrassed blush rising in my face.

"Voyeur," Link accused, his own cheeks scarlet at the implications. The Queen of Thieves's grin widened.

"Guilty," she admitted, then sighed. "Well, since there's nothing interesting going on up here, I suppose I'll be heading back now. Enjoy the rest of your night," she called, sauntering off back down the hill. Suddenly self-conscious again, I wrapped my arms over my bare stomach.

"She's not exactly subtle, is she?"

"Not by a long shot," he replied, looking as uncomfortable as I felt. He cleared his throat. "It _is_ getting kinda late, though, maybe we should get to bed."

"Yeah," I agreed.

* * *

After returning my ill-used sword to the armory, Link and I found our way to what Nabooru and Kali had sworn vehemently was the _only_ available room in the village. Neither of us particularly believed that story, however, and although we slept together more often than not, it was embarrassing to think that other people actually _knew_ about it. Like they were presuming we did things that we didn't do.

All complaints aside, though, it was a gorgeous room, decorated in rich purples, pinks, greens, and oranges with a low bed in the center surrounded by a silk canopy. Even more, there were countless exotic plants in hand-painted clay pots scattered around the room, giving it a flowery smell.

"It's so pretty!" I exclaimed happily, letting myself fall backwards onto the bed.

"I swear, you're so girly sometimes," he said, taking off his boots before joining me on the bed, propping himself up with an elbow.

"Yeah, well, I blame that on you," I replied. He gave me an understandably confused look.

"How so?" he asked, grasping me about the waist with his free arm and pulling me closer to him. Commence warm, fuzzy feeling and fluttering in my stomach.

"Well, I mean... most of my life I've kinda acted like a boy," I explained, cringing inwardly at just how cheesy my next words were bound to sound. "I never really even _felt_ like a girl... until I met you. I know how dumb that sounds," I added hurriedly.

"It doesn't sound dumb all, stop doing that," he scolded gently, bringing his hand up to fingercomb my hair. "Nothing you've ever said has been dumb."

"Even the whole thing about that tree in the forest mocking me?"

"That was insane, not dumb," he corrected, laughing, as he bent to kiss me.

"Your belt buckle is digging into my stomach," I winced. Normally I doubt it would have bothered me, but metal edges against bare skin isn't too comfy.

"Oh, sorry about that," he said, quickly removing the belt, and kissing my stomach apologetically.

_Okay, this is not supposed to turn me on_, I chided myself as warmth started spreading through me. _Damn you, body._

"I still haven't figured out how they talked you into wearing this," he said, gracing me with his beautiful smile. I looked away, blushing, not at all in the mood to admit that I'd been coaxed into said outfit with the promise that he'd enjoy seeing me in it.

"They're evil, manipulative bitches," I answered truthfully. "Particularly Kali."

"Well, no arguments there," he chuckled, lightly stroking my midriff with his fingertips and making me blush even more. "But personally, I kind of like it." Alright, so the slutty costume wasn't a complete waste after all...

"I still don't like anybody seeing my stomach," I grumbled.

"Why not?"

"I have no idea, I'm just shy about it," I confessed.

"I just kind of figured... you know, after the other morning when I accidentally saw..." he trailed off, blushing and refusing to look me in the eye.

"Yeah, about that, um..." I swallowed nervously, but decided now was as good a time as any to put my mind at ease. Or lack thereof, depending on his answer... "Did it totally disappoint you? Seeing my breasts, I mean. I know they're too small-"

"Will having small breasts keep you from nursing a child?"

"No, but-"

"Then there's no problem with them, so stop complaining. Plus, if you want my opinion, smaller breasts are more attractive anyway," he added quietly, running his knuckles along the underside of my left breast, and glancing at me as though he half expected me to smack him for it. If he'd been anyone else, I _would_ have smacked him, but as it were...

"Your hands are warm," I sighed. Seemingly emboldened by my lack of physical violence in response, he took the entire breast in his palm. "And they're shaking like crazy," I added teasingly, failing to restrain a giggle. Looking embarrassed, he pulled away, sitting up and crossing his arms.

"I've never done this before, alright? Excuse me if I'm a little shy," he said defensively, looking pointedly away from me.

"You're so cute when you're pouting," I cooed. He turned his head toward me, and I expected him to come up with a smart-assed retort (I _had_ been rubbing off on him, after all). Instead, he pulled me astride his lap and gave me the kind of kiss Nabooru would probably have sold her soul to walk in on and tease us about. I yanked his hat off and threw it in the general direction of the door before wrapping my arms around his neck, and he put his hands on my hips in response. I almost fainted when I felt his tongue in my mouth, but in my defense we'd never kissed with our mouths open before. It was nice - made me feel tingly.

I took my arms from around his neck in favor of sliding my hands up his shirt and massaging his incredibly yummy chest and stomach. I felt him shiver before conceding and just helping me to pull his shirt off. I ogled him shamelessly for a second (okay, he's hot, leave me alone) before returning my lips to his. I shifted my weight slightly, and he hissed. I broke the kiss.

"Did I hurt you?" I asked, wondering how I'd managed that.

"You didn't hurt me," he assured, though once again he seemed incapable of looking me in the eye, and was blushing furiously. "It's just a little uncomfortable for you to be moving around in my lap right now, considering..." Very slowly, it dawned on my exactly why. And I started blushing even more than he was.

"Maybe I can help with that," I offered. Where the hell I got the nerve from, I have no clue, but I found myself slipping one hand down his chest and into his pants to stroke him. My breath caught at the feel of him in my hand, and I couldn't help but picture the other things that could be done with that particular piece of anatomy.

"Goddesses, have you always been this bold, and I just failed to notice it?" he breathed, his eyes closing in pleasure.

"Hey, I'm surprising myself here, so just enjoy it until my modesty returns." Was it bad of me to get so much joy from the fact that I had reduced the Hero of Time to groaning and panting? Because I was really getting off on the power, and was practically high off it when he came, calling my name before collapsing onto the tall pile of silk brocade pillows behind his back. Ayden hadn't been lying, apparently, when he'd told me how much an orgasm took out of someone.

"Damn," he said, still breathing heavily. "That was... wow." I felt my cheeks burning, and smiled shyly.

"Glad you liked it," I replied, rubbing his stomach again, "because I don't know where it came from, or if I can summon the guts to do it again. I think maybe I let Freya and Ishtar give me too much mead," I joked nervously, now that my modesty was, in fact, returning in full force. He laughed.

"Strong stuff, but I don't think that's the case," he responded. "You seem perfectly sober to me."

So much for convincing myself that the delicious honey wine was to blame for my actions. I didn't have the opportunity to worry about it for long, though, before he lay me on my back, kissing my neck and collar bone. The throbbing between my legs was becoming almost painful at that point, but I couldn't really complain. He gave me a mischievous smile that made my heart skip a few beats.

"So," he began, trailing a finger down my body, beginning at my clavicle and ending at the ridiculously low, gilded waistband of my pants. "Can I...?"

"No!" I cried, horrified.

"No?" he repeated, looking confused and, honestly, a little hurt. I decided to elaborate.

"I have my period," I explained, more than slightly peeved at the monthly side-effect of being female. As if there could have been a worse night for me to be bleeding from the womb...

"If you think I'm at all squeamish about that, you're mistaken." Okay, valid point. Still...

"I don't wanna get blood everywhere," I said, biting my lip.

"Millerna, this entire city is made up of women. They all get their periods, and they will understand." Why was he making so much sense tonight? And why the hell was I second-guessing this?

"If you're sure it doesn't gross you out..."

"Not in the least," he assured, slipping his hand under the waistband. I held my breath as his fingers carressed my outer folds, before gently separating them to trace my opening. "There was something I kept hearing being mentioned in stories," he said over the sighs and moans I was sure were coming out of my mouth, "if only I can find where it is..."

"I think you found it," I gasped as his thumb brushed over the exact place I'd felt the throbbing, and it sent an intense shock through me. He continued to massage the same place, and I felt like I might burst. "Oh, yeah, no question. God, that's nice..." He kissed me softly.

"You're so beautiful like this," he whispered in my ear, at the same time as he slid two fingers into me, moving them slowly in and out. It felt strange and startled me for a second, but damn, it felt good. Moments later all the built-up tension basically exploded, hitting me with the best feeling I'd ever had, and I had to bite my tongue for fear that I'd scream, thus allowing everyone in the vacinity to know what we'd been doing.

"How the hell did you learn to do that?" I demanded, still panting, and enjoying the all-over relaxation I was now experiencing. He blushed and flashed a gorgeous smile.

"Would you believe me if I said I had no idea?"

* * *

Meanwhile...

"Farore, come on, couldn't you have let me take it a _little_ farther?" Nayru nagged, tugging on the sleeve of the Goddess of Courage's green yukata. Farore rolled her eyes.

"Nayru, I think you've manipulated Link's mind enough in the past few days. Play with your own Triforce-Wielder," she replied. Nayru pouted.

"But Zelda's _booooring_, and I wanted them to make love," she complained.

"You wanted to _watch_ them make love," Din corrected, glancing at her sister overtop the scroll she was in the process of reading.

"Unfortunately, however, not all of us share your penchant for watching mortals copulate," Farore added.

"Excuse me, Miss 'I-have-a-huge-collection-of-dirty-romance-scrolls-that-I-keep-hidden-under-my-bed', at least I'm an honest pervert! And you know that if it were any other pair of mortals, you'd let them have sex. You're just overprotective of Link," Nayru accused, sticking her tongue out.

"He's mine, and I'm allowed to be," Farore answered stubbornly, crossing her arms. Nayru made a face.

"Din, make her wrong!"

"Can't do, she has a point," the Goddess of Power informed, shrugging. Nayru grumbled, fell into a cushy chair, and pulled the box of donuts on the end table into her lap.

"Fine, then these are all mine. I'll bite anyone who tries to eat one."

"If she didn't keep hogging all the donuts, maybe the Sages would actually start _coming_ to staff meetings," Din speculated, primly rearranging her red yukata over her knees.

"How the hell did you get named the Goddess of Wisdom, Nayru?" Farore asked, shaking her head. Nayru simply snapped her teeth, and bit into a donut.

"She really is smarter than she acts, though," Din said fairly. "Sometimes."

(A/N- As I said earlier, if you don't like it, just don't review it. Flames me no likey.)


	38. An Unlikely Advisor

(A/N- Squee, you DO still like me! Aww, I love you guys:hugs, kisses, and cookies to all reviewers: Well, I can't very well discontinue the fic now, can I? It's summer now, so I'll try to write more often. Thank you for all the support, it's very appreciated, and incredibly reassuring…. And I blame this particular lack of update on A) the fact that we had to move everything in the house into weird places to get the remodeling done, and B) the fact that my computer ate a floppy disk, and my friend just recently fixed it to allow other disks to enter.

….I make too many excuses for myself.)

Note: From now on, dreams will be written in italics.

* * *

_ I was in the theives' camp again, and it was completely empty. Immediately, I was afraid that Carlos and Ganondorf had their army on the move, and began frantically forming a plan to protect the castle against invasion. _

_ "Hey, relax, I just like it better this way," a voice called out from behind me. I unsheathed my sword and spun around to face the newcomer. He looked slightly older than me; one of those tall, dark, and handsome types women go crazy about, with his curly black hair pulled into a ponytail. He was dressed in nondescript cloth pants and a sleeveless leather jerkin that showed off the kind of arms I would have killed for, but had never managed to obtain by any amount of sword-swinging. Bastard._

_ "Who are you?" I demanded. He held up his hands to prove he was unarmed, the good-natured grin never leaving his face._

_ "Put that away, man. Honestly," he continued, "do you swing your sword at _everyone_ you meet? How is it you're still a virgin?" He laughed merrily at his own joke. I scowled._

_ "That was terrible, and it's none of your business," I replied, reluctantly returning my sword to its sheath. "And you still haven't told me who the hell you are." He sighed._

_ "Here I was hoping you'd figure it out on your own. Way to ruin my fun, Link." I decided not to ask or care why he knew my name. In a flash, we'd returned to the room Millerna and I were sharing in Gerudo Valley. She was still lying there, asleep. Before I could stop him, he'd knelt on the bed next to her, stroking her hair affectionately. I felt a surge of anger. He was most definitely _not_ allowed to touch her, even if it _was_ a dream._

_ "She's something, isn't she?" he said, the wistful sound of his voice completely throwing me off._

_ "Yes," I agreed cautiously, wondering exactly where he was going with this one._

_ "She has a good heart. I know how much she tries to hide it, but she does. That with her strong spirit, it really drew me to her, you know?"_

_ I was suddenly hit with recognition._

_ "Ayden?"_

_ "In the flesh. Well, not exactly," he corrected, giving me a half-hearted grin. "I persuaded Farore to let me barge in on your dreams for a little while. There are some major restrictions on your means of communication when you're dead. It really sucks sometimes."_

_ "I can imagine."_

_ "There are times I just wish I could _talk_ to her, tell her not to worry about me anymore," he went on, looking haunted as he regared Millerna's sleeping face. "But I know even if I could, it'd just make her cry. I hate seeing her cry. I've never told anyone, but I would have married her if I'd had the chance." _

_ I tried to ignore the gnawing little twinge of jealousy that comment inspired - after all, Ayden was dead, it was ridiculous to be jealous of him when I was so obviously better off..._

_ "Why are you telling me all this?"_

_ "I want you to promise me you'll take care of her," he said seriously, looking me in the eye. "She can't do it herself nearly as well as she thinks she can. I don't care how strong she is, she needs to be loved and protected."_

_ "I would die before I let anything happen to her," I swore. He smiled, and shook his head._

_ "The best thing you can do for her is _not_ die," he said with a dry laugh. "I already let her down in that department, remember?"_

_ "That wasn't your fault."_

_ "We'd been planning to escape Carlos for three years before I died, did she ever tell you that? Hell, if I hadn't wasted my time, then maybe... But, you can't change the past." He stood up and walked toward the door. "My time limit's about up, but if I could make a suggestion?"_

_ "What?"_

_ "I know you're planning to go to the camp when you wake up and try to sneak up on Ganondorf, and I can tell you right now it won't work. He and Carlos have their tents heavily guarded, there's no way you could get in. But here's a fun fact: the tent Millerna's little sisters share is virtually unprotected at night, now that the King of Evil and my bastard cousin have more pressing matters to attend to. Think about it," he finished, flashing a grin before he vanished._

_

* * *

_

I was instantly awake, though slightly disoriented. I turned my gaze to Millerna, still sleeping in the same position as she had been in my dream. A position which, I noted with a blush, caused the fabric of her nightgown to fall in a way that left quite a bit of one breast exposed. I was incredibly tempted to utilize that easy access, but instead I reached down and pulled our quilt up over her shoulders before climbing out of bed and getting dressed.

Ayden's spirit wanted me to change my sneak-attack to a rescue mission; easier said than done. Getting one person in and out of a guarded area was tricky, but it was possible, and I was highly practiced at it. Trying to smuggle three people out without being noticed... that was going to be a logistical nightmare. Even if I managed to get them out, they wouldn't all fit on Epona, and a few more missing horses would be obvious - not to mention, fairly noisy to obtain.

"How the hell am I gonna work this out?" I wondered, raking a hand through my hopelessly messy hair.

"You could use a comb, like normal people," came the groggily mumbled response. Millerna was capable of wiseass comments only seconds after waking. It should have been offensive, but I found it oddly endearing.

"I wasn't talking about my hair," I said.

"What _were_ you talking about?"

"Nothing important," I lied Well, I couldn't very well tell her the truth – she'd insist on going with me. "I just have some tricky business to take care of for Zelda. I have to leave tonight; I'll be back in a few days."

"I'll come with you," she said instantly. _Dammit…_

"No, it's… it's a boring thing, really, you'd hate it. You'll have much more fun here with the Gerudos. Speaking of, I need to go talk to Nabooru about this whole thing – it won't take too long."

Whether or not she believed me, I hurried out the door before she could protest. I hated lying to her – hated lying in general, actually. But if it was for her own good, there was no harm done, right?

I reached the door to Nabooru's chamber and knocked loudly; I'd learned years ago that it was the only way to wake her from the alcohol-induced comas she regularly put herself in. Seconds later she opened the door, rubbing her eyes and reeking of booze. Yep, that's my Nabooru.

"What the hell, kid, it's not even noon yet," she grumbled, starting to close the door again. I caught it and held it open.

"It's important, Nabooru," I said. She seemed to be considering this for a moment, then let out an over-dramatic groan and allowed me inside.

"Fine. Make it quick, though, would you? I have some sleeping to attend to."

As per her request, I recited my plan as quickly as possible, and to her credit, she magically regained sobriety the second she heard the name 'Ganondorf'. Funny the kind of impact vicious mass murderers have on people…

"I don't know, kid, this sounds like a suicide mission," Nabooru said flatly. "I get that you want to save your woman's sisters, but it's a hell of a risk to take."

"Don't worry about me, I've been in much more dangerous situations," I said dismissively. "All I need you to do is keep Millerna here, safe, while I'm gone."

"She's welcome here for as long as she'll stay," she replied. I let out the breath I'd been holding.

"Thanks, Nabooru."

"Hey, anything for you, kiddo," she said, grinning and patting me a little too roughly on the back; yeah, she was still fairly drunk, but I trusted her ability to keep Millerna safe over anyone else's.

_ So, there's one less thing to worry about…_

* * *

(A/N- I know, short transition chapter. But the next one should be sufficiently more action-oriented. Toodles, lovies!) 


	39. A Heroic Stunt

(A/N- I need to stop doing this to my stories, I really do. Thanks be to Vime for the much-needed intervention which brought this chapter to be. But first, some frivolity to jump-start my Millerna-writing ability: character specs, sort-of à la Hana Kimi (which is highly recommended, by the way).

Millerna Baccu

Age: 16

Race: Human

Zodiac: Aries, year of the Dragon

Height: 5 feet 6 inches

Weight: 154 lbs

**Relevant Skill Levels**

Good: close-range weapons; martial arts; balancing on narrow surfaces

Fairly Good: potion-making; hand-thrown projectiles

Mediocre: horsemanship; cooking; archery; sword fighting

Abysmal: planning ahead; dancing; being quiet

Also, I hear conflicting opinions as to how long after Ocarina of Time (in which period this story is obviously set) Twilight Princess takes place – from "a decade" to "a few hundred years", but it seems to me all in-game indicators point to, at the very least, a couple of centuries having passed between the two games, which is the assumption I would like you to accept for the sake of this story. I'm just throwing that out there in case anyone who starts reading this after having read said conflicting opinions about the TP timeframe gets confused by me.

Also-also: Erin + algebra no, so if you don't agree with my idea of how long it would take to catch up to someone on a horse… just have a chuckle at my expense and let it go. Or, like, if it really bothers you: do the math yourself and tell me the answer so that I can put real, legit data in this chapter.)

* * *

_Business for Zelda, my ass_, my inner voice snarled as Epona's hoof beats faded into the distance. 

Okay. So it was by no means the first time I'd been lied to, but it was sure as hell the first time I'd been lied to so _badly_, which I intended to bring to his attention once I caught up with him. And though I didn't know where he was headed, I had a pretty good idea of how to find out.

"Nabooru! I know you're in there!" Well, actually I wasn't positive, but I'd taken a wild guess and pounded on the most extravagantly decorated door I could find. In my experience, that seemed to be the surefire way to find whoever was important at any given place in Hyrule: just look for the fanciest door. It was a good theory; a solid theory; and a _proven_ theory, because Nabooru was, indeed, the one to answer.

"Hey, girlie! What can I do you for?" she asked cheerfully, the big grin on her face almost certainly due to the half-empty bottle of rum in her grasp, which was disconcerting enough to make me temporarily lose my train of thought and just stare at her.

"You're drinking again? Already? I watched you take out the better part of a keg last night!"

"Yeah… I like to think of it as living life to the fullest," she said, with the air of one imparting divine wisdom to the unenlightened. She held the bottle out to me. "You want some? I have more."

"No, thanks."

"Aw, no rum? I could get the girls to ply you with mead again," she offered, which… made me blush about how I acted under the influence of mead, which made me think of Link, which reminded me that Nabooru's unhealthy drinking habits were not what I had come to talk about. Hah! Train of thought regained!

"Nabooru, where's he going?"

"Oh, Link? I don't know. Probably off to do some obligatory hero… thing," she said, taking a swig of her rum. I narrowed my eyes.

"He never mentioned anything to you? Nothing at all?"

"Not a thing."

"Really? Because according to him he discussed it with you this morning."

Nabooru opened her mouth; then closed it again. Then she smiled. "Well, guess you caught me. _Very_ tricky, I'm impressed."

"Where is he going?"

"Why didn't you ask _him_?"

"I _did_," I answered, barely containing the urge to slam my fist into the wall (solely because… well, it would have broken my hand and done no harm to the wall, so how productive would it be?). "And he swore to me – while arming himself to the teeth and carefully avoiding looking me in the eye – that he was going off on unimportant, completely non-dangerous business for the princess, and would be back in a few days."

"First order of business: teach Hero of Time to _lie_," Nabooru groaned, looking as though her very soul were being crushed under the weight of such a disappointment.

"Where is he?" I repeated.

"Hmm… I'm forbidden to tell you," she responded airily, with the sort of self-satisfied, shit-eating grin that had me forgetting about composure, twisting her around, pinning her to the wall, and pressing a knife to her throat. And even then, she looked like she was enjoying the situation far too much.

"Dammit, Nabooru, this isn't funny," I growled. "Tell me where he is!"

"Why do you want to know?"

"So I can go and back him up, why do you think?"

"Ooh, see, that won't work. He specifically requested – twice – that I keep you right here and out of harm's way –"

"And you agreed?!" I raged, wholly pissed off at both of them.

"Actually, both times I more or less said that you could stay as long as you wanted, but dear, sweet Link has never been good at picking up on loopholes, so he took it as my solemn vow to hold you captive, yes," she explained with a shrug. I paused and considered that.

"…Wait. So, if I'm free to go, why the hell won't you –?"

"He's headed to Carlos's camp to try and spring your sisters, but frankly he doesn't seem to have a damned clue how to pull it off. He's got about a twenty-minute head start on you, so if you hurry, you should be able to catch up and pitch a few ideas before he actually has to execute whatever plan he's going on – two heads are better than one, and all that."

I stared at her, confused. "Why didn't you just tell me that in the first place?"

"Well, think about it," she said, smirking once again. "Here I am with lots of able-bodied warriors at my beckon-call – possibly armed myself, for all you know – and yet you had the nerve to pull a knife on me because you thought your man might need your help."

And _then_ it all clicked. I released her.

"The hell, Nabooru, were you fucking _testing_ me?" I spat. Not altogether unexpectedly, she did not look to be feeling the slightest bit of guilt.

"Yes. And you passed. Congratulations, you're worthy; now go make sure he doesn't get his stupidly brave ass killed."

* * *

"You are a _profoundly_ stupid man," was the first thing out of my mouth when I caught up with Link two hours and one very tired horse later – which was _just_ in time, as he was nearly to the mountain trail that led to the camp. Funny thing: he actually looked surprised to see me. 

"What are you doing here?"

"Oh, come on! You honestly thought I fell for that 'official business' story? You are the _worst_ liar in the history of bad liars; how the hell do you survive as a public figure?"

"Never you mind! The last time I checked, we were both in agreement that you would stay in Gerudo Valley."

"I wasn't thinking clearly when I agreed to that, and I certainly had no idea you were about to go and do something _this_ dumb! New rule: I'm staying with you no matter what happens, whether you like it or not. That… didn't come out how I expected it to, but either way, if you take off again, I'll find out where you're going and follow you again."

He looked at me for a few moments, like he was trying to figure out exactly how he felt about that, but ultimately he must have resigned himself to the fact that he was stuck with me, because he proceeded to fill me in on The Plan. The Plan basically consisted of waiting for Navi to find out the positions of the guards; sneaking in; and sneaking out without any of us dying, but it was a plan nonetheless. I suggested blowing something of Carlos's up (as a diversion, I swear), but Link declared that counter-productive ("I understand the concept of unadulterated loathing, Millerna, but we're going for stealth, here."), so it was left out of The Plan.

In the interest of being as quiet as physically possible, we left the horses at the start of the trail. Navi soon showed up and, after shooting me the customary hateful glare, reported two Moblins guarding the entrance gate and a few men asleep around the fire pit by the shore, but otherwise no security for about fifty yards. We only needed to go thirty yards, so as long as we didn't actively draw attention to ourselves, it seemed that getting in, getting out, and not getting killed was actually a more than reasonable plan.

The Moblins had their backs to us and were easy to take out with a longshot and a throwing knife, respectively, and the guys asleep by the fire… well, judging by the empty bottles, they'd just imbibed enough alcohol to impress the Gorons and Gerudos combined, so I doubted they'd be a viable threat any time soon. By the time we made it to my sisters' tent, I was honestly feeling very optimistic about the whole situation – and kind of stupid for having worried so much. Granted, Carlos had never been this lax with security, so I'd had reason to worry, but… hell, who was I to question his change of heart?

We slipped into the tent to find Dana and Lilliana asleep in their beds. Serenity was nowhere in sight. Her absence struck me as a little odd because she'd never been 'required' this late into the night before, but I didn't have time to worry about it; I had to figure out how to _quietly_ wake the two loudest young girls I'd ever met. On the one hand, I could do it the old-fashioned, completely non-scary way and just pray that they made no sound. Or…

I caught Link's attention and pointed to Lilliana. "You cover her mouth, I'll get this one," I whispered. He gave me a look.

"Won't that be the _slightest_ bit unsettling?"

"Yes, and they're much less noisy after they've had a good scare," I explained, simultaneously clamping a hand over Dana's mouth. Her eyes flew open, and she started squirming. "Dana, it's me, you idiot!" I hissed. Either her eyes had adjusted to the dark, she'd recognized my voice, or she'd remembered that there was only one person who frequently called her an idiot, because she stopped trying to escape, and instead glared at me and attempted to pry my hand away from her mouth. I pressed it down more firmly. "If you promise to be _quiet_, I will let go."

She glared harder, but I caught a muffled "I promise," so I took my hand away from her mouth before she decided to bite it.

"Why are _you_ here?"

"We're rescuing you," I said. Dana looked puzzled by my use of the plural, before catching sight of Link (who appeared to have ignored my instructions and woken Lilliana in a kinder, gentler fashion). She looked back at me, eyes wide.

"I _knew_ it!"

"Where's Serenity?" I demanded, ignoring her outburst.

"She never comes back before almost daybreak, anymore," Lilliana replied.

"Carlos shares her with the scary red-haired man now," Dana chimed in.

I was about to suggest that we set fire to Carlos's tent on principle, but the look of recognition on Link's face caused a particularly large knot to begin forming in the pit of my stomach. If that look meant what I knew it must, then trying to free Serenity would more likely than not end in all of us getting killed. Carlos was one thing; the King of Evil was quite another.

_Karma is going to destroy my ass for this…_

"Let's get out of here," I said. "Right now. Dana, Lil… we don't have time to take your things, just get your shoes on and let's go."

"But Serenity –" Lilliana began to protest.

"It's not worth the risk."

"Millerna, she's our _sister_!"

"And she'll be fine for now, Dana. For once in your life, just do as I say."

And by some strange miracle, they both stopped questioning me and started pulling their shoes on. I happened to glance over at Link, and I instantly regretted it. He had on this 'I know how much it hurts, but you're doing the right thing' look, which made me feel even sicker and angrier than I already did. I exited the tent before I could give in to the overwhelming desire to punch the man I love in the face, and went about two steps before smacking into something solid.

You ever have one of those days where, apart from a few glitches, everything seems to be working out perfectly, to the point where you get a little too confident and The Powers That Be decide to punish your lack of suffering by reaching into the jaws of Contentment and ripping out the Worst Case Scenario with a side of Doom?

Well, the solid object in question was a six-and-a-half-foot oaf named Tobin, and this was clearly one of those days.

"_Intruders!_" he bellowed, nixing my feeble hopes that maybe he was _just_ dumb enough to believe I'd returned with no ill intentions.

"Fuck," I stated, distracted enough by the truly unpleasant sight of hundreds of armed men rushing out of their tents that I didn't notice Tobin's sword swinging in a downward arc towards the top of my head until after the blow had been countered by Link of The Amazing .001-Second Reaction Time.

"_Pay attention_, Millerna!" he admonished, hacking away at Tobin and two other hulking humanoids – the first out a long trail to reach us. I pulled out my knives and started hurling them at the closest of the approaching enemies, sending a silent prayer of thanks to Ayden that the majority hit and felled their marks; Link was already fairly well surrounded (taking them out quickly, but they replaced themselves almost as fast), so the fewer new guys to reach him, the better.

"What's going on?" Dana demanded, at the exact moment I ran out of knives and swore accordingly.

"What does it _look_ like, Dana?!" I snarled, getting my whip chain uncoiled in time to shoot it out at two guys standing side by side, get it caught it around both their necks, and yank it, knocking their heads together with a loud crack.

"You two get out of here," Link instructed, slamming the flat of his sword against a guy's face hard enough to crush it into a bloody mess. "Millerna and I will hold them off for as long as we can."

"There's no way out," Lilliana cried. "They've set a fire around the gates!"

Link echoed my earlier sentiments of, "_Fuck!_" and started tearing more viciously into the pack of guys around him.

"I have an idea!" Dana squealed, dragging Lilliana by the hand past the falling body of a guy I'd just caught in the throat. As far as I could tell in the split second I was able to devote to watching them, they weren't followed, which lifted my spirits ever-so-slightly. Maybe they _would_ be able to find a way out on their own, and would make it to somewhere safe.

As for me, I was coming to the grim realization that the chances of Link and me getting out alive were dwindling from slim to none with each new wave of blade-wielding bastards. We'd started out hugely outnumbered; now we were hugely outnumbered and getting tired, and the stream of fresh, fully-energized enemies looked like it could go on for hours.

Not that we would survive that long, unless –

"Guys! Over here, quick!"

I had never appreciated it before, but there really _was_ something to be said for a ten-year-old girl with a voice capable of piercing the sound of a battle. Running as fast as we could manage, we followed Dana's voice to the end of the dock, where she and Lilliana had rigged the sails of the smallest boat. Torch in hand, Dana motioned for us to climb aboard. I noticed an unusual smell coming off the dock, but I chose to ignore it as we freed the boat.

…And drifted all of three inches with the current.

"There's no wind!" I yelled. Which, you know, made me feel horribly stupid when the breeze immediately picked up and started propelling us into open water. When we'd gotten ten feet away, Dana tossed her torch onto the dock. Flames shot outward from the torch, and in a matter of seconds the dock, along with every remaining boat, was completely engulfed. Link and I stared at my youngest sister. She smiled.

"Lamp oil. There were barrels of it on the dock."

I was just considering actually hugging my siblings when Carlos chose to step outside and behold the destruction we had caused. The look of absolute rage on his face would have been enough for me, but he sweetened the deal by glaring straight at me and shaking his fist.

"I will kill you if it's the last thing I do, wench!" he screamed in a wholly undignified manner, looking millimeters away from a full-on tantrum.

"Good! I like you better as someone who wants to kill me than someone trying desperately to fuck me!" I answered, as the little boat picked up even more speed from that sudden wind, and carried us out to sea.

* * *

Meanwhile… 

"…What?" Farore asked, putting on her most innocent expression. Nayru glowered.

"Way to interfere."

"That wasn't inter_ference_, it was inter_vention_. There is a difference."

"Oh, I see: if _I_ do it, I'm interfering, but if _you_ do it, you're intervening."

"Why, Nayru! You _are_ smarter than you let on!"


End file.
